dipso

And I am just coming out of a pretty severe, debilitating depression/funk. Don't know if my wife can deal any longer, she is simply too tired of having something (it's always something) broken, difficult, or not 'right' with my head.
Don't really want to drink, but don't really want to rejoin AA, either, it never really 'took' with me that much anyway.
Oh, well....life can be a bitch sometimes.

Recovery1983

Sorry to hear that you are in a funk dips. I've done AA before too, but it never really attracted me. I'm currently going to NA on a regular basis, and I seem to be able to relate to NA a lot better. Something I hear in the meetings a lot is that no matter how many days, year, decades you have been sober, life continues to happen. When I hear this, I get really depressed because I figure that if i'm sober, all the good things should start happening, however, it's definitely not like that for me. For now, I just concentrate on the fact that I know where drinking/using will lead me, so I need to avoid that at all costs.

A rut or a funk can be very dangerous to recovery. It was the topic of discussion in one of the meetings a few days ago. I think you are aware of complacency, or otherwise you wouldnt have gone through the trouble of posting in here. Do something about this rut or funk. I'm not sure how tight your finances are, but reward yourself by doing something fun or enjoyable. Treat yourself to dinner, sporting event, movie, etc.. I hope you get out of it.

Dee74

not a diagnosis - but do you think you might be clinically depressed Dipso?
ever seen a Dr or a therapist?

D

2granddaughters

Did your wife complain while you were going to meetings?

Is the pain of severe debilitating depression less than going back to AA and committing?

My life didn't improve until I committed to AA. You know the difference between committed & involved?

It's like a bacon & egg breakfast ... the chicken is involved and the pig is committed.

You are going to have to "took" with AA, don't wait for it to take to you. Get a Home Group and a sponsor .. get active.

All the best.

Bob R

Anna

I hope that you will talk to your dr.

It could be possible that antidepressants would help you, or maybe a therapist.

dipso

Oh, believe me, kids, I have been/done/tried/am trying all of the above.
No particular therapy or recourse is being particularly effective. AA isn't magic, pharmaceutically, this is stronger juju.

paul99

I am not a doctor, so can't say what it is. If you've tried everything then I am not sure what else to say. AA or any other program isn't pharmaceutical, of course, but I know that AA helped with some of my low level depression and anxiety, which was caused from my untreated alcoholism. Anyway, best of luck...hope you find what you need.

Wookie85

congrats on getting 3 years

whiskeyman

AA is the omnly thing that worked for me.
Did you work the program. Sponsor, steps, step study. ALL OF IT.
Rarely have they seen a person fail.

It saved my life, and i didnt want it to work.
They i really committed to everything they had to offer, going to meetings was only a small part of the program.

I still get down/blues but i know they will go away. one way to make them go away is to get out there and help someone else

nfijules

For me....my life works well and I am happy when I am mostly working a program....(I attend AA and CMA). A few months ago, I was tired of the meetings, people etc.....and within weeks, I was flat on my back stuck in a depression and crazy thoughts coming back......I prayed and prayed and overnight, I woke up and I knew what I had to do.....get a new sponsor....call my buddies and get involved again. I have never felt better....AA didn't work for me at one time, only because I didn't want it to work. "If we thouroughly follow the path" This is just my experience....goodluck and hope it gets better for u!

laurie6781

I was like you the first 9 years of my recovery and YES I did use AA, however, this was way too deep for AA and I only got discouraged more when it seemed to me that nothing I did relieved either the very DEEP abyss I was in or those absolute horrible highs I would get.

It took a really GREAT Psych Dr that had a lot of experience working with sober alcoholics to finally figure out that I was Bi Polar.

Then it took several years of literally 'trial and error' to find the correct combination of Anti D's to get me on the correct tract. I, of course, was expecting them to work as soon as I put one in my mouth and swallowed with water, roflmao

Please see a good Psych Dr and be honest with said doctor. It can only help and not hurt your recovery.

Love and hugs,