Icant seem to get it...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: inland empire ça
Posts: 71
Icant seem to get it...
Hey guys how are all u doing? I made it i believe 5 or 6 days sober and now i have been drinking heavily.. I keep tellin my self tomorrow will be different.. Well tomorrow never is its the same thing every day wake up hung over blurry vision ears ringing shaking and losing my mind.I have a really supportive family they all know what im fighting.. Im drinking 3/4 of half gallon a day.. My right side hurts i have no money for dr.. Im scared because i know im killin my self ... I keep tellin my self its a choice make the right choice plain and simple... I just cant get it right. Im 39 yrs old i was BIG TIME METH SMOKER from the age of 21 to around 29.. I have 2 kids i have never seen because i lost them due to my drug habit.. My parents spent close to 50 40 thousand dollars on drug rehab and all i did was meet more people to use with...I stole from my entire family for drugs.. One day i woke up crying and have never used a drug since i was 29.. Well about 6 yrs ago i started abusing alcohol..I never woulds believed i could stop usin speed but alcohol proceeds to ravage my life and body..I feel helpless ashamed and disgusted.. I went to salvation army rehab n seattle for a month and left.. I might a guy who have sinc become good friends with.. We still talk and hes sober still there doing great..I feel bad evening talking to him cause i have been drinking and feel like im not beingUN fair to his recovery.. Because mine is a total lie..Sorry for the rant GOD BLESS U ALL..
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,378
Sorry you're still struggling bnmbh.
There are a lot of free or low cost clinics around - if there's one in your local area you might get some medical advice there?
Free/Low-Cost/Sliding-Scale Clinics
211 may be helpful too.
2-1-1 Call Center Search
Have you thought about a recovery group - like AA or some other group like that?
Sometimes just a little change can create a lot of ripples, y'know?
D
There are a lot of free or low cost clinics around - if there's one in your local area you might get some medical advice there?
Free/Low-Cost/Sliding-Scale Clinics
The 10377 clinics in this database are free, low cost, low cost with a sliding scale based on income, or offer some type of financial assistance.
2-1-1 Call Center Search
2-1-1 provides free and confidential information and referral. Call 2-1-1 for help with food, housing, employment, health care, counseling and more. Learn more about your local 2-1-1 by looking it up here.
Sometimes just a little change can create a lot of ripples, y'know?
D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by bnmbh 
Hey guys how are all u doing? I made it i believe 5 or 6 days sober and now i have been drinking heavily.. I keep tellin my self tomorrow will be different.. Well tomorrow never is its the same thing every day wake up hung over blurry vision ears ringing shaking and losing my mind.I have a really supportive family they all know what im fighting.. Im drinking 3/4 of half gallon a day.. My right side hurts i have no money for dr.. Im scared because i know im killin my self ... I keep tellin my self its a choice make the right choice plain and simple... I just cant get it right. Im 39 yrs old i was BIG TIME METH SMOKER from the age of 21 to around 29.. I have 2 kids i have never seen because i lost them due to my drug habit.. My parents spent close to 50 40 thousand dollars on drug rehab and all i did was meet more people to use with...I stole from my entire family for drugs.. One day i woke up crying and have never used a drug since i was 29.. Well about 6 yrs ago i started abusing alcohol..I never woulds believed i could stop usin speed but alcohol proceeds to ravage my life and body..I feel helpless ashamed and disgusted.. I went to salvation army rehab n seattle for a month and left.. I might a guy who have sinc become good friends with.. We still talk and hes sober still there doing great..I feel bad evening talking to him cause i have been drinking and feel like im not beingUN fair to his recovery.. Because mine is a total lie..Sorry for the rant GOD BLESS U ALL..
All the best.
Bob R
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
Thought I'd post because I'm in your age range and recently kicked alcohol. I'm 38 and have been completely alcohol-free for 8+ months and it has been a crazy ride.
I also spent time in a treatment facility and it really helped. I also use a number of strategies, including some AA, some AVRT reasoning, and I try and surround myself with common people and friends who I can use as allies in my fight. One of the first thing I did was tell all my drinking friends that my problem was serious and I needed their support. Some have been great, others not so great, but in the end it's been helpful because they all know my situation - embarrassing a bit, but it's a good thing. Have you been able to talk to your family and friends about this? That might be a good first step - and yes an AA meeting might help you here in your early goings for starters. Good luck, brave of you to post.
I also spent time in a treatment facility and it really helped. I also use a number of strategies, including some AA, some AVRT reasoning, and I try and surround myself with common people and friends who I can use as allies in my fight. One of the first thing I did was tell all my drinking friends that my problem was serious and I needed their support. Some have been great, others not so great, but in the end it's been helpful because they all know my situation - embarrassing a bit, but it's a good thing. Have you been able to talk to your family and friends about this? That might be a good first step - and yes an AA meeting might help you here in your early goings for starters. Good luck, brave of you to post.
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