letuslove

I wasn't quite sure whether to post this here, or in the friends/family of alcholics section. I decided I would benefit from the opinions of those who experience alcoholism themselves..

I come on this forum mostly for support about my mom - who is a severe alcoholic (she has cirrhosis). I will be turning 21 in April, so the thought of being "legal" to drink is on my mind. I don't drink much to begin with (maybe 1-3 times a month) but I have noticed a pattern when I do. I never casually or socially drink. I drink to get drunk, never in between. The last time I drank, I was with some friends casually drinking, and when they left, I continued drinking by myself to keep the buzz going.. that included taking two straight shots. I have kind of freaked myself out a bit. I haven't been able to control my drinking, even though it has only been a few times. I'm not just a normal college kid who enjoys partying.. I am very aware of alcoholism and never want to mess with it. So I am wondering, am I at risk? Am I acting abnormally?

Dee74

Hi letuslove

I think there's some definite red flags there - and I think you know that too.
Have you tried not drinking?

D

letuslove

Yes, like I said, I rarely drink. I turn down going to parties quite a bit. It's just when I do, I don't control myself. I have told myself "Oh I won't drink a lot" but I do anyway, and I get very sick the next day (vomiting, even after a night of only 4-5 drinks). Thank you for your response.

laurie6781

From what you have posted I see 'red flags' also.

You do know that alcoholism runs in familys.

You might be better off just not drinking at all. What concerns me is that you admit that
you drink to get drunk. I know that feeling well even all these years later.

You ask if you are at risk. I have to answer, YES a very GREAT RISK!

Just my humble opinion.

Love and hugs,

DAB

Yes, you are at risk. Alcoholism can start even with a casual drinker, then progress into something uncontrolable. It may take many years, sometimes sooner. You sound
like a raging alcoholic lacking frequency. Good on you for recognozing this enough to come here and ask questions. Welcome!

DoubleBarrel

Sounds a lot like me in the early days. I would continue drinking long after everyone else had gone home, and then I'd go home and drink there too.

In my humble opinion, stop drinking now. There is nothing to be gained, and everything to lose.
This is what I intend to tell my children when they get a bit older, never to start.
Plenty of people just don't drink, and its much easier to never do it, or quit when you are younger.
You can avoid looking back on 20 years of regrettable predictable nonsense.
Even if not, there is really nothing good to come out of it. You have already admitted that once you start, you don't stop.
Once that pattern begins, so many things can happen, all of them bad.

LadyinBC

The bottom line for me is that I can't stop at one.

julez

Red flage for sure. Please take our wards seriously, as we know what we are talking about. Take care of you, and be gentle to yourself

LexieCat

I'll chime in, too--yes, you are at risk.

The good news is, if you rarely drink now, it might not be that difficult for you to simply become a non-drinker. I know people who don't drink for other health reasons, or just because they don't like the way it makes them feel. They are not social outcasts. They just don't drink. If you continue to stay away from it and work on having a good time without it, I think your future self would thank you.

Tamerua

I drank like that. Not everyday, but after one, there was no off button until I passed out and my dad was an alcoholic, he passed about thirteen years ago from cirrhosis. I would listen to the folks here. Best of luck,

mm222

Definitely red flags. That sounds a lot like me in college-Deep down I knew there was a problem then and I so wish I had listened to myself and stopped then!

Take care of yourself!

instant

I think what is inherited is the capacity to develop "cravings" and having a faulty off switch. Love of the buzz rings alarm bells.

Many people dislike the feeling of intoxication. Not me. I love it. I chased it for too long then I was hooked.

Fernaceman

You could very well be at a crossroad. You don't HAVE to cross over the line into alcoholism, despite the tendencies being there. If/when you feel that you cannot control it and you cannot stop, despite being faced with consequences you no longer desire, maybe you should reevaluate. Maybe that time is now, I don't know your whole story, so I really don't know.

TimD

Ten years ago I didn't drink all the time. When I did, I usually got drunk. Ten years ago I told other people, "I'll never be an alcoholic because I can't stand the taste of whiskey or hard liquor. I just like beer."

8 months ago this week I was drinking a half gallon of whiskey every two days and found myself in detox followed by 21 days of rehab.

Boleo

Bad news is - you are on the road that leads to alcoholism.

Good news is - you are at a very low mile marker.

Now is the time to ask yourself how far you intend to go?

Xenshe

Hey letuslove -

Two phrases I noticed in your post:

"I drink to get drunk, never in between"
"I am very aware of alcoholism and never want to mess with it"

Hmm. I believe you have already self-identified! Listen to your gut - you've watched your Mom all these years, lived with her disease. I'm certain that has been very painful for you.

I am an alcoholic. I grew up watching my Dad, also an alcoholic. It's weird - you'd think that experience, watching someone you love circling the drain, and taking you down with them, would be enough to keep you from ever even considering picking up a drink. But it's not, since addiction is a disease which runs in families.

The frequency of your drinking is not what really matters - it's what happens when you do. And you already know that. Maybe you just needed to hear it from someone else. You have the power to stop this cycle from perpetuating itself. I wish you luck.

RightLAine

Yes some say that Alcoholisim or the addictive personaility does have some genetic traits. My grandmother was an alcoholic, my mom recently passed away from cirrohis..she was an alcoholic and now I am worried I am going dow the same path. I just joined this website today. Right now it sounds like you are just drinking recreationally but just keep in mind that it alcoholism starts somewhere and you drinking on the weekends with friends can easily turn into you drinking everydayby yourself....do you need to avoid alcohol all together just because your mom is an alcoholic.....no but you need to be careful b/c it can easily happen to you. Good luck