Advise? Dear Friend Relapsing
 

Hello everyone. First off I want to say thank you to everyone on here. Sober Recovery has been a HUGE help for me while learning about and accepting myself as an alcoholic. I read on here every day, sometimes several times a day, and it helps me greatly. I have kept up on just about every post for at least the last 6 months and have been mostly sober the entire times with just a couple slips. Twice I have made it 2 months then had a little slip but quickly got back on my feet.
The reason I am posting today is because a very dear friend of mine is in the midst of a relapse, 3 days in. She has been a huge help to me also, even taking me to my first (and only) 10 AA meetings starting back in April of 2012. She has been very supportive of me seeking a life without alcohol. I am very worried about my friend because she has a couple duis, has been fired from her job and has attended a few outpatient programs and one inpatient. She had just shy of 15 months sober, and has been working at a new job for about 2 months now. But, she bought some beer so now its definately not looking good for her. I am worried that she is definately going to end up losing this new job that she has worked so hard this last year to get.
Anyways, I know there isn't really a whole lot that I can do, and I need to continue to focus on myself, but this is pretty upsetting for me. If this would have happened a month or two ago I am sure I would be drinking right now too. But I feel pretty strong in my own sobriety and really want to get some advise on how I can help her, if it's at all possible.
Thanks

i wish i knew what to say,, but i will watch the responces.

All we have to give is our experience, strength and hope. Does your friend want to get back on track?

There are no magic words, just you being honest about your own experience, and only if your friend is interested in hearing it.

I hope you soon have your sober support buddy back. It is SO hard when someone we know in recovery takes a tumble, when they were someone we looked at as an inspiration. We are all human, and need one another.

Ultimately, only she can save herself. But as a valued friend, you could sit down with and say something to the effect, I really appreciate all you did to help me get my life in order, to find sobriety. I get the sense that you are slipping away as a friend. Is there any way I can return the favor you gave me, and help you get back sober? I don't want to see anything happen to you. I know it's your choice, your life. But I just want to know I'm concerned. No judgment. Just concern. And I'm willing to help if you'll accept it.

I agree with the others here. We can't save anyone else.

We can share our experience, we can share our concern - but do remember Patty it's up to your friend to walk her journey not you.

You have your own journey to walk :)

D