Black Outs
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 32
Black Outs
This is one aspect of alcoholism that drives be bananas! It is embarrassing
to wake up the day after, look at the caller id, and see a plethora of numbers that called during my black out. What did they want? What did they say? WHAT DID I SAY?
A couple of weeks ago I had a friend call me on a sober night and reverted back to a conversation I did not know I had with him 2 nights
earlier. I told him I must of been in a black out. He said he could tell I
was drunk over the phone. Anyway he proceeded to tell me what I said
in the conversation. All were intelligent responses I made but he could
not jog my memory into remembering anything. So, "who," was talking
to him? This reconstruction of black out conversations drives me crazy.
There is also an old Latin saying, " in vino veratas," which means, "in wine the truth." Basically a drunk man or woman may say things, secrets, they would never say sober. When people know you are drinking ... they will call you and pick you for information. I notice when
I have a long period of sobriety the late night phone calls slow down
a lot. Food for thought!
to wake up the day after, look at the caller id, and see a plethora of numbers that called during my black out. What did they want? What did they say? WHAT DID I SAY?
A couple of weeks ago I had a friend call me on a sober night and reverted back to a conversation I did not know I had with him 2 nights
earlier. I told him I must of been in a black out. He said he could tell I
was drunk over the phone. Anyway he proceeded to tell me what I said
in the conversation. All were intelligent responses I made but he could
not jog my memory into remembering anything. So, "who," was talking
to him? This reconstruction of black out conversations drives me crazy.
There is also an old Latin saying, " in vino veratas," which means, "in wine the truth." Basically a drunk man or woman may say things, secrets, they would never say sober. When people know you are drinking ... they will call you and pick you for information. I notice when
I have a long period of sobriety the late night phone calls slow down
a lot. Food for thought!
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Central America/Florida USA
Posts: 4,064
When I was drunk, the truth didn't come out - but a lot of hateful trash sure did spill from my pie-hole. My drunk phone calls and texts tended to be either mean or overly friendly, neither of which made the recipient comfortable! Thanks for the post and giving me this topic to ponder.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Ontario Canada
Posts: 77
I don't believe that. I was also hateful, nasty and evil. This is not my personality and I used to worry that it was. I also did the late calls, emails etc. I have learned to accept that the person drunk is not me.
I find it hard to separate the two but you have to in order to stay sane.
I find it hard to separate the two but you have to in order to stay sane.
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Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 27
I've lost a lot of friends and girlfriends that way, through drunk texting. A lot of my comments were mean-spirited and irrational. They often did stem from some truths deep down that I felt on the inside but as a sober person I would be understanding, forgiving, and RATIONAL about it. There were many many mornings Id wake up and not know what I texted to these people but I did remember it not being good so I would be scared to go back to look at what transpired the night before. I felt too embarrassed. Of course, whether i look at the drunken texts or not, it doesn't make them go away in the eyes of their recipients. sometimes, i would text the person back admitting i was drunk. other times, i would be too embarrassed to say so and the person just ended up thinking i was just insane.
Man, I always hate when someone refers back to something i said before and i have no memory of that conversation taking place. its very embarrassing. sometimes so embarrassing that i would try to find a way of pretending i knew what they were talking about
Man, I always hate when someone refers back to something i said before and i have no memory of that conversation taking place. its very embarrassing. sometimes so embarrassing that i would try to find a way of pretending i knew what they were talking about
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by fishisms 
I've lost a lot of friends and girlfriends that way, through drunk texting. A lot of my comments were mean-spirited and irrational. They often did stem from some truths deep down that I felt on the inside but as a sober person I would be understanding, forgiving, and RATIONAL about it. There were many many mornings Id wake up and not know what I texted to these people but I did remember it not being good so I would be scared to go back to look at what transpired the night before. I felt too embarrassed. Of course, whether i look at the drunken texts or not, it doesn't make them go away in the eyes of their recipients. sometimes, i would text the person back admitting i was drunk. other times, i would be too embarrassed to say so and the person just ended up thinking i was just insane.
Man, I always hate when someone refers back to something i said before and i have no memory of that conversation taking place. its very embarrassing. sometimes so embarrassing that i would try to find a way of pretending i knew what they were talking about
Man, I always hate when someone refers back to something i said before and i have no memory of that conversation taking place. its very embarrassing. sometimes so embarrassing that i would try to find a way of pretending i knew what they were talking about
black out. The following morning I would check my computer and see
emails I had sent and it was like who typed those emails?
Now when I drank tequila or mezcal I could be very mean. Usually the person I was talking to would pick at me just to get me riled up. I just
hope I can continue to leave it alone.
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,949
I never blacked out during al lmy heavy drinking, but i still said or typed stuff i wish i hadn't even when sober. I think even being taken over by emotion can be a lot like being drunk. You have unresolved conflicts in your head, hidden anger that you can't express. when someone or something triggers you the brain chemistry changes and your judgment goes out the window. I think you have to forgive yourself of these things. I believe everybody is guilty of it to an extent.
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: KC MO
Posts: 980
There is some truth to saying what one really feels when drunk. But it's also true the imagination takes over,and blows what you really feel out of proportion.
So common sense goes out the window sooner or later. I drank to blackout almost every night.
I'm soo glad I don't have to worry about that sort of thing anymore.
Fred
So common sense goes out the window sooner or later. I drank to blackout almost every night.
I'm soo glad I don't have to worry about that sort of thing anymore.
Fred
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: highland beach, florida
Posts: 649
Good Thread!
I never have been able to resolve that issue to my satisfaction. I was (does it surprise anyone) the mean "Go F--- Yourself" drunk! I am still that way but it takes so much more to pull the trigger on that kind of behavior.
All I know is I am eternally gratefull--the internet, texting, and emailing--oh and phone cameras did not exist in the 80"s when I was at my peak as "the Evil Spawn".
No proof exists as to what an A--H--- I was God got me anyway, I married the constant reminder of that behavior, and my husband never misses an opportunity to remind me what he had to put up with!!!
Oh! don't feel sorry for him, he is no "box of chocolate" himself, thank God we ended up with each other, we saved two unsuspecting innocents from a fate worse than death. Been together 28 years and never happier--who knew???
I would love to know if there has ever been a study about how and why "Drunk" vs Sober" personalities manifest themselves.
Anyone done any reading on this?
I never have been able to resolve that issue to my satisfaction. I was (does it surprise anyone) the mean "Go F--- Yourself" drunk! I am still that way but it takes so much more to pull the trigger on that kind of behavior.
All I know is I am eternally gratefull--the internet, texting, and emailing--oh and phone cameras did not exist in the 80"s when I was at my peak as "the Evil Spawn".
No proof exists as to what an A--H--- I was God got me anyway, I married the constant reminder of that behavior, and my husband never misses an opportunity to remind me what he had to put up with!!!
Oh! don't feel sorry for him, he is no "box of chocolate" himself, thank God we ended up with each other, we saved two unsuspecting innocents from a fate worse than death. Been together 28 years and never happier--who knew???
I would love to know if there has ever been a study about how and why "Drunk" vs Sober" personalities manifest themselves.
Anyone done any reading on this?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 32
Black Outs con't
A lot of people that are non drinkers or teetotalers think a black out and passing out as the same thing. Passing out usually follows a black out
if more alcohol is consumed. When you are in a black out, you are conscious and can interact with others. It is usually after you come to
the next day and try to remember the night before that you have gaps
in memory. As discussed in above posts people have to fill in the gaps for
you as to your actions during the black out. Unless they know how alcohol
works they will be incredulous of your lack of memory. Food for thought.
if more alcohol is consumed. When you are in a black out, you are conscious and can interact with others. It is usually after you come to
the next day and try to remember the night before that you have gaps
in memory. As discussed in above posts people have to fill in the gaps for
you as to your actions during the black out. Unless they know how alcohol
works they will be incredulous of your lack of memory. Food for thought.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: inland empire ça
Posts: 71
Originally Posted by Swampfox1963
This is one aspect of alcoholism that drives be bananas! It is embarrassing
to wake up the day after, look at the caller id, and see a plethora of numbers that called during my black out. What did they want? What did they say? WHAT DID I SAY?
A couple of weeks ago I had a friend call me on a sober night and reverted back to a conversation I did not know I had with him 2 nights
earlier. I told him I must of been in a black out. He said he could tell I
was drunk over the phone. Anyway he proceeded to tell me what I said
in the conversation. All were intelligent responses I made but he could
not jog my memory into remembering anything. So, "who," was talking
to him? This reconstruction of black out conversations drives me crazy.
There is also an old Latin saying, " in vino veratas," which means, "in wine the truth." Basically a drunk man or woman may say things, secrets, they would never say sober. When people know you are drinking ... they will call you and pick you for information. I notice when
I have a long period of sobriety the late night phone calls slow down
a lot. Food for thought!
to wake up the day after, look at the caller id, and see a plethora of numbers that called during my black out. What did they want? What did they say? WHAT DID I SAY?
A couple of weeks ago I had a friend call me on a sober night and reverted back to a conversation I did not know I had with him 2 nights
earlier. I told him I must of been in a black out. He said he could tell I
was drunk over the phone. Anyway he proceeded to tell me what I said
in the conversation. All were intelligent responses I made but he could
not jog my memory into remembering anything. So, "who," was talking
to him? This reconstruction of black out conversations drives me crazy.
There is also an old Latin saying, " in vino veratas," which means, "in wine the truth." Basically a drunk man or woman may say things, secrets, they would never say sober. When people know you are drinking ... they will call you and pick you for information. I notice when
I have a long period of sobriety the late night phone calls slow down
a lot. Food for thought!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: highland beach, florida
Posts: 649
Originally Posted by Swampfox1963
A lot of people that are non drinkers or teetotalers think a black out and passing out as the same thing. Passing out usually follows a black out
if more alcohol is consumed. When you are in a black out, you are conscious and can interact with others. It is usually after you come to
the next day and try to remember the night before that you have gaps
in memory. As discussed in above posts people have to fill in the gaps for
you as to your actions during the black out. Unless they know how alcohol
works they will be incredulous of your lack of memory. Food for thought.
if more alcohol is consumed. When you are in a black out, you are conscious and can interact with others. It is usually after you come to
the next day and try to remember the night before that you have gaps
in memory. As discussed in above posts people have to fill in the gaps for
you as to your actions during the black out. Unless they know how alcohol
works they will be incredulous of your lack of memory. Food for thought.
If your discussing the Alcoholic Blacout--Elizabeth 888 mentioned a new book out titled--The Alcohol Blackout by Dr. Donal Sweeney, Pobert A. Liston
the discussion is on Alcoholics thread Page 4-- .
FYI
Galatians 5:13
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Tampa Bay
Posts: 329
Black outs are under studied. I know this by trying to find sound research on them. There seems to only be theories. Most of which didn't seem to jive with my experience. I seemed to black out nightly, get up go to work, and start the process over again. No real loss of function or memory, except during the black out ;- )
I blacked out almost every time I drank. The last few years of my drinking time I never remembered the last few hours of the night. Because I hid how much I drank, I could never admit my blackout.
The worst was promising my young nieces and nephews something and not remembering it. To see the disappointment or hear it over the phone, "Aunt Tammy, where are you? You said you'd be here by 6:00." I'd be 3 sheets to the wind and unable to do what I promised.
When my mom would stay over, I'd often say, "hey let's finish that movie we started." She'd be like, "we did last night!" I'd play it off and watch it another time.
I think I act completely normal during a black out. The only thing out of the ordinary is if I became angry. I would go beyond angry and get into a rage - it has happened a few times and a couple of occasions cost me loved ones (not death, just the relationship).
The worst was just not knowing what I said or did - just seeing broken stuff and small flashes of the incident. I would always feel justified in my sobriety because I couldn't remember all of the fight, only pieces of what set me off.
I think black outs were the #1 symptom to lead me to a sober path.
I've driven small children while blacked out. I've held conversations with complete strangers at restaurant bars blacked out; then run into them another time and have NO IDEA who they were even though they were all smiles and happy to see me. For years I don't remember going to sleep. I'd wake up in the spare room or on the couch and wonder if I had fought with my husband. I'd always wait for him to speak first in the morning to see what level of trouble I was in - if he was happy and flirty (yea, me), if he was quiet and withdrawn (oh crap, how do I get out of this one).
Well, back to my opening line... black outs are under researched. It isn't clear what they are, why they happen, and what the long and short term damage can be. There is only some studies and some speculation - no hard facts.
Doctors always try to scare you and make black outs sound so serious and fatal, but then they couldn't back the warnings up with hard data. Just what a beast needs to keep feeding! :- )
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I blacked out almost every time I drank. The last few years of my drinking time I never remembered the last few hours of the night. Because I hid how much I drank, I could never admit my blackout.
The worst was promising my young nieces and nephews something and not remembering it. To see the disappointment or hear it over the phone, "Aunt Tammy, where are you? You said you'd be here by 6:00." I'd be 3 sheets to the wind and unable to do what I promised.
When my mom would stay over, I'd often say, "hey let's finish that movie we started." She'd be like, "we did last night!" I'd play it off and watch it another time.
I think I act completely normal during a black out. The only thing out of the ordinary is if I became angry. I would go beyond angry and get into a rage - it has happened a few times and a couple of occasions cost me loved ones (not death, just the relationship).
The worst was just not knowing what I said or did - just seeing broken stuff and small flashes of the incident. I would always feel justified in my sobriety because I couldn't remember all of the fight, only pieces of what set me off.
I think black outs were the #1 symptom to lead me to a sober path.
I've driven small children while blacked out. I've held conversations with complete strangers at restaurant bars blacked out; then run into them another time and have NO IDEA who they were even though they were all smiles and happy to see me. For years I don't remember going to sleep. I'd wake up in the spare room or on the couch and wonder if I had fought with my husband. I'd always wait for him to speak first in the morning to see what level of trouble I was in - if he was happy and flirty (yea, me), if he was quiet and withdrawn (oh crap, how do I get out of this one).
Well, back to my opening line... black outs are under researched. It isn't clear what they are, why they happen, and what the long and short term damage can be. There is only some studies and some speculation - no hard facts.
Doctors always try to scare you and make black outs sound so serious and fatal, but then they couldn't back the warnings up with hard data. Just what a beast needs to keep feeding! :- )
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Blessed Man
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Brookline, MO
Posts: 13
The truth is my words today that when I was drinking I only felt that I had to be buzzed to be loose enough to share certain truths. Today after sixteen years of one day at a times sometimes even less then that one minute at a times. I have become an open book. The truth is found when I do a fourth step there is such a freedom in finding the roots of why I am who I am.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: highland beach, florida
Posts: 649
I think balckouts were the #1 symptom to lead me to sober path
Tammy,
Maybe they are not such a bad thing after all--blackouts have led many people to sobriety. Maybe that is what a blackout is for-- to scare us into quitting.
They were always my worst fear after a night out--WTH did I say or do last night? I am going to have to deal with today. I do know I NEVER once admitted I was drunk and couldn't remember. I was like you and always seemed to justify my behavior.
I am so happy those days are over--now when I can't remember I know it's just senility.
Tammy,
Maybe they are not such a bad thing after all--blackouts have led many people to sobriety. Maybe that is what a blackout is for-- to scare us into quitting.
They were always my worst fear after a night out--WTH did I say or do last night? I am going to have to deal with today. I do know I NEVER once admitted I was drunk and couldn't remember. I was like you and always seemed to justify my behavior.
I am so happy those days are over--now when I can't remember I know it's just senility.
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: South central USA
Posts: 11
My AW was caught having sex with a man in a car in a restaurant parking lot. She blamed it on an "alcoholic blackout." I'm skeptical. Also, I wonder - how many times has this happened. 5 times, 10 times ... who knows?
Black Outs con't Galatians 5:13
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Tampa Bay
Posts: 329
Bob936 - she should have blamed it on the alcohol, not the blackout. I don't think people act differently during a blackout than they would with too much alcohol in their system. Alcohol can bring suppressed feelings out - whether those feelings are glee, anger, fear, etc.
I'm with swampfox - did she know this guy? It is hard to believe it was random unless that was just her nature to do something like that.
I'm with swampfox - did she know this guy? It is hard to believe it was random unless that was just her nature to do something like that.
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