nfijules

Hello! I am new to this but thought I would try here. I am sober 2+ years and just now sponsoring a girl. She is a meth addict ...she is sober about 30 days but continues to hang out in bars and has taken a drink, "only because someone handed it to her" I am confused on how to take her sobriety date...I myself feel that "its all or nothing" and if she drank, that next day would be her first day of being sober. What do you have to say about this? Thank you for all your support!

robgt350

AA was not really for me..i am close to 11 weeks sober now. to me you are going to get sober no matter what type of support you have, in the end you did it. to me a sponsor is like a mentor/professor in desperate times of need.
think of a math teacher teaching correctly teaching math formulas or incorrectly. you might make or break. so be careful please.

DoubleBarrel

Sobriety date starts from the time of your last drink. Sometimes, people are just not ready yet, as heartbreaking as it might be.
Good luck. Try and answer questions. At the end of the day, she has free will.

bbthumper

Its all or nothing for me. Abstinence from all mind altering chemicals.
Sounds like she's not ready to commit. Remember you can only carry the message you can't deliver it. Dont try to fix her. If she wants what you have then show her how you got it. If she's not willing to do what you did then send her on her way until she is ready.

nfijules

Thank you....I have to keep reminding myself this! I can't make her think what I think! Thanks all for your advice. This helps tremendously!

Bigndfan175

jules - as my sponsor has said to me " hang out in a barbershop long enough eventually you're going to get a haircut"

until she's ready to change her lifestyle there's nothing you can do, my sponsor dropped me til I was serious about changing (year later)

PreciousKitty

I think it's great that you are sponsoring someone and care for advice. Don't be soft on her but don't get too hung up on the sobriety date. Good Luck!