Justfor1

I've decided to take the Dr.'s advice and wean off the anti-anxiety med. I never took more than prescribed but realize I have become very agitated & aggressive when I go more than a few days of not taking it. I think they call it "rebound anxiety". I take klonopin and indeed it is a powerful drug. I just don't know how I'm going to deal with the panic attacks. I have relapsed on vodka & crack /heroin because of the agitation. I would count the pills at the pharmacy to make sure they didn't short me & they had the right generic version.
Contrary to what many will probably say, I did not ever get "buzzed" or high off them. I will not restart my sobriety count & hope others don't bother trying to convince me otherwise.

MrTumble

Hang in there j41, don't worry about resetting counters, just work on getting clean. That mix of booze, crack, heroin and medication sounds like living hell to me, you're doing the right thing by getting out of that nightmare.

Xune

There alternatives to benzos for anxiety, such as ssri's.

Talk to your Doctor.

MemphisBlues

Weaning is very counter intuitive but highly recommended. Benzo.org is a great site with weaning information. Many shrinks and GPs think weaning isn't necessary, or opt for a taper program that is fast. The prevailing wisdom out there is to take it slow and titrate very small amounts.

There are several tapering schedules out there, some more aggressive than others. Klonopin has a very long half life, but Valium is actually much longer. Many professionals suggest a switch to Valium and tapering that drug.

I had a friend who was taking two milligrams ever other day or so, and his doctor said to just quit. He did, went through a couple of anxious days, and then hit a freak wall at about 10 days out. I had another friend who was prescribed three to four milligrams a day, quit cold turkey and didn't have a problem at all.

The first friend found a new doc who totally bought into the weaning idea, prescribed Valium and took four months to titrate Valium. Wasn't easy, but at six months she was doing great. She came clean with her new doc totally. Said she was in recovery, said the anxiety was a major contributing factor to using and drinking, and the doctor worked with her the whole way.

Klonopin never got me high, either.

Justfor1

memphis, I'm like your first friend taking 2mg every couple of days. But it seems when it's running out in my system I get anxious & extremely agitated.

MemphisBlues

Benzos are just known to do that to some peoplet. Without getting too technical, from what I understand benzos replace the calming neurotransmitter GABA. Benzos clog up the neurons that absorb GABA, totally replacing GABA, creating that warm calming feeling benzos provide. Benzos work stronger, quicker and more efficiently than GABA. Benzos work, and that became a real problem for me.

When you remove the benzo it's not just as if the neurons start absorbing GABA for some reason. GABA just flits about with no place to land, and upon complete withdrawal, it just takes time for the neuron to learn how to absorb GABA again.

So we sort of freak out.

I'm not sure if that's what happens in inter dose withdrawal, that time between dosage when we start to feel more anxious than when we took the drug in the first place. I think that's part of the whole rebound anxiety thing.

Benzo.org is a great site for this information. But I think the problem with the site is that on the forums, people who are just really, really suffering post, and it can be some scary stuff. I suspect for the majority of people, they just don't have the complications others experience, and for me, the power of suggestion that I would experience everything I read about became overwhelming.

It's really best to maybe talk to the doctor who was wary of refilling your prescription for help. Read the material on line about taper programs. I think Benzo.org even has a file to print out suggested to be given to doctors.

Many doctors are just going to think we are drug seeking when we ask for help and desire to stick to a stringent tapering program. Printing out the material and showing that you are serious about it, that you have studied about it, and that your are damned dedicated to recovery might sway them to help you.