What to do.
 

Hello again all. Last year, Feb 23rd was my last trip to the hospital. after five days, I was released. I didn't have a drink for 9 months and 3 days after that. Then on a SUnday, I started again. Out of the blue and for no reason.

Since then, it has been 2+ months of drinking every day.

I can't let this continue. I am already back to feeling like crap if I don't have a drink by early afternoon. I keep telling myself 24 hours, time takes time, one day at a time, but I am lost.

My next visit won't be to the hospital, it will be to the morgue.

I'm stuck and can't get out of this rut.

Help.

Maybe one more visit to the hospital for a safe detox is in order.

If you are truly desperate, I suggest AA. It has been known to work when nothing else does.

Are you open to face to face support?

see your Dr? counseling?
a recovery group be it AA or something else?

It seems like it might be time to call in some reinforcements?

D

What initially got you to stop was it the hospital scare?
I think Lexie's advice is key. Perhaps get a safely detoxed and admit yourself into a rehab program and get to the root of why you would just start again for no reason out of the blue. Something had to trigger your desire to drink.

Dee, I have just been reading over my past posts and you have always been there. Thank you.

There are some things I can't do. One is make it anywhere. I don't have any transportation. The closest meeting is more than 30 miles away.

I can't go to the doctor. I don't have a personal Doc and the hospital won't let me back in. My last bill for the 5 days was for 186 THOUSAND DOLLARS. So, no help there.....

I know I'm making what seem to be excuses, but I have put myself in the position I'm in. I don't know why I turned the switch back on. I don't know what changed.

You guys are the closest thing I get to attending a real meeting anymore.

I'm reading the Big Book every day. I know I need to repair before I return to who I was. Thankfully, I am not back to the same place I was, but if I don't do something soon, I am in for it.

Is there anyone in South Florida here who can reach me? But that is just me being selfish again.

17 minutes. 1 more beer. Then the 24 hours starts. I can make it for one day, right?

I don't know if I have any good advice, but wanted to wish you the best. I find your candidness refreshing. There is a lot of support here, as you know. There have also been many that have found success utilizing SR and other similar resources.

Thank you Ghostly. I need to be back here. I guess that is why I showed up again this evening. It is proving to be a wise choice so far. I appreciate you all so much more than I could ever express.

If nothing else, SR is a great place to be.
I credit the community here with helping me find my way, and helping me stay true.

Post and read regularly - you can do this :)

D

You might also check out the Salvation Army. I've heard that they have a good rehab program.

Do all that you can, if you want to live. We're all in the same position as you, maybe not exactly alike, but we all know we need/needed to change if we wanted to have a good/healthy life. It's not too late...try to find help. Things will get better...don't give up.