Is Sobriety Really Worth It...????
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: highland beach, florida
Posts: 649
[QUOTE=Justfor1;3784859]
Well that was just lovely Just4one
----What exactly are you looking for?
You ask the question "Is sobriety really worth it" ? then when you get answers you don't agree with, you DISMISS the poster in a very snarky way.
Aren't you the one who believes alcoholics are criminals and do not deserve to be given "the disease" out? Yet you think it would be a good Idea to go back to that lifestyle, because all your problems don't go away now that you are sober. How does that make sense?
Furthermore if you do not want the input from this forum, don't ask for it.
Frankly IMO, I think you need a pscyhiatrist to prescribe you something for your attitude, since I agree with you that you are in a depressed state. Alcohol won't cure that, neither will sobriety--meds will help. Why not try it again with a doctor you don't want to sue.
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters 
Literally all of my "mental health" issues are dealt with in the 12 Steps
That is literally the most dangerous advise I could have read. That statement you made could get people killed. Thankfully, now that I am sober I can dismiss this advice & move on.
That is literally the most dangerous advise I could have read. That statement you made could get people killed. Thankfully, now that I am sober I can dismiss this advice & move on.
Well that was just lovely Just4one
----What exactly are you looking for?You ask the question "Is sobriety really worth it" ? then when you get answers you don't agree with, you DISMISS the poster in a very snarky way.
Aren't you the one who believes alcoholics are criminals and do not deserve to be given "the disease" out? Yet you think it would be a good Idea to go back to that lifestyle, because all your problems don't go away now that you are sober. How does that make sense?
Furthermore if you do not want the input from this forum, don't ask for it.
Frankly IMO, I think you need a pscyhiatrist to prescribe you something for your attitude, since I agree with you that you are in a depressed state. Alcohol won't cure that, neither will sobriety--meds will help. Why not try it again with a doctor you don't want to sue.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,949
[QUOTE=Justfor1;3784859]
take everything with a grain of salt Justfor1
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters
Literally all of my "mental health" issues are dealt with in the 12 Steps
That is literally the most dangerous advise I could have read. That statement you made could get people killed. Thankfully, now that I am sober I can dismiss this advice & move on.
That is literally the most dangerous advise I could have read. That statement you made could get people killed. Thankfully, now that I am sober I can dismiss this advice & move on.
take everything with a grain of salt Justfor1
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: highland beach, florida
Posts: 649
[QUOTE=caboblanco;3785021]
take everything with a grain of salt Justfor1 .......but Cabo aren't you the one that posted you knew people who were alcoholics and still were able to drink "in Moderaton".
That sounds like information that could get alcoholics killed also.
You are right to take all posts with a grain of salt, as it is the "opinion" of the poster, but you do not have to be dismissive about it. Right?
Originally Posted by Justfor1
take everything with a grain of salt Justfor1
That sounds like information that could get alcoholics killed also.
You are right to take all posts with a grain of salt, as it is the "opinion" of the poster, but you do not have to be dismissive about it. Right?
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,435
Ok, everyone stop....breathe.
as far as I can see, noone has given any dangerous advice in this thread.
opinions have been expressed & experience has been shared... but that's what we do here, right?
D
as far as I can see, noone has given any dangerous advice in this thread.
opinions have been expressed & experience has been shared... but that's what we do here, right?
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Whenever I have thoughts like this, I make it a priority to think from a different angle.
For example its about -4 here and snowing.
I'm not a huge fan of snow, I don't like driving it.
But......there are people in this world who live in third world countries who would give their high teeth for a bit of ran. They do not have enough to eat, they and their babies and children have little water and its not always clean. Their livestock might be dead. They are victims of disease, extreme poverty.
There are also homeless people who have to sleep out in this.
They have no warm bed, blankets, hot drinks when ever the want, a warm bath, cosy clothes, entertainment from the television, laptop and radio. Family members or friends to chat to.
Someone has always got it a lot worse.
I can feel sorry for myself a lot, but thinking thoughts like that makes me realise I have no real reason to think like that.
Distraction always works best for me. Getting out of my own head.
I do a bit of self hypnosis before I go to sleep or if my thoughts are driving me mad.
If I feel angry I do something energetic. This might only be aggressive hoovering, or sorting the recycling by flinging it the bin with force at speed! But after a while I do feel better.
For example its about -4 here and snowing.
I'm not a huge fan of snow, I don't like driving it.
But......there are people in this world who live in third world countries who would give their high teeth for a bit of ran. They do not have enough to eat, they and their babies and children have little water and its not always clean. Their livestock might be dead. They are victims of disease, extreme poverty.
There are also homeless people who have to sleep out in this.
They have no warm bed, blankets, hot drinks when ever the want, a warm bath, cosy clothes, entertainment from the television, laptop and radio. Family members or friends to chat to.
Someone has always got it a lot worse.
I can feel sorry for myself a lot, but thinking thoughts like that makes me realise I have no real reason to think like that.
Distraction always works best for me. Getting out of my own head.
I do a bit of self hypnosis before I go to sleep or if my thoughts are driving me mad.
If I feel angry I do something energetic. This might only be aggressive hoovering, or sorting the recycling by flinging it the bin with force at speed! But after a while I do feel better.
High on Life
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Been to Hell and Back
Posts: 1,157
Originally Posted by Justfor1
The question popped into my mind, "sobriety isn't helping so why not buy a six pack?"
Originally Posted by Justfor1
I'm going to be honest with my group tonite. I had a horrible slip yesterday again. It's like the "monster" is on my back again. I hate it. I hate the feeling of needing alcohol to cope with life. I know these slips will eventually lead me back to everyday drinking/drugging. I'm not afraid of dieing in my addiction, I'm more afraid of living in the hell of addiction for another 10-20 years.
It doesn't seem like drinking was working out for you either
Originally Posted by Justfor1
Well SR friends after 15 months of having the awful alcohol machine device on my car, I have got the approval to remove it!! It was suppose to be 18 months but they said it's okay to remove now & I can get my full drivers license. This is after 3 DUI's & a few fender benders driving intoxicated. Of course, now the true test will begin. All this is because of hard work & jumping through "the hoops" of the system. Of course, I have to give credit to God, AA, friends & SR.
It does seem like things were going better for you though.
You decide, the choice yours.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I think the key is just what nandm said. My own depression and anxiety were directly attributable to my drinking. They have gone away with my recovery from alcoholism and with my continued sobriety. BUT I know many people with serious mental health issues for whom the Steps alone were not enough. Their medications and other treatments could not work, however, as long as they were drinking.
Hope you find some relief, and peace, soon, Jf1. Hang in there. I think that in your heart of hearts you know that throwing away your sobriety would not be worth it.
Hope you find some relief, and peace, soon, Jf1. Hang in there. I think that in your heart of hearts you know that throwing away your sobriety would not be worth it.
Life the gift of recovery!
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Home is where the heart is
Posts: 7,061
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters
Once I began to address the fear, selfishness, selfpity and stubbornness, and started to work my program ..... my depression and suicidal thoughts commenced to drift away.
Literally all of my "mental health" issues are dealt with in the 12 Steps
All the best.
Bob R
Literally all of my "mental health" issues are dealt with in the 12 Steps
All the best.
Bob R
That said there are many very real mental health conditions that the 12 Steps can not and do not address. Schizophrenia, Bipolar disorder, PTSD, chemical depressions to name a few. Even the Big Book states that it is not a cure all for mental health problems.
From The Big Book "The Family Afterward" page 132.
Now about health: A body badly burned by alcohol does not often recover overnight, nor do twisted thinking and depression vanish in a twinkling. We are convinced that a spiritual mode of living is a most powerful health restorative. We, who have recovered from serious drinking, are miracles of mental health. But we have seen remarkable transformations in our bodies. Hardly one of our crowd now shows any mark of dissipation.
But this does not mean that we disregard human health measures. God has abundantly supplied this world with fine doctors, psychologists, and practitioners of various kinds. Do not hesitate to take your health problems to such persons. Most of them give freely of themselves, that their fellows may enjoy sound minds and bodies. Try to remember that though God has wrought miracles among us, we should never belittle a good doctor or psychiatrist. Their services are often indispensable in treating a newcomer and following his case afterward.
Now about health: A body badly burned by alcohol does not often recover overnight, nor do twisted thinking and depression vanish in a twinkling. We are convinced that a spiritual mode of living is a most powerful health restorative. We, who have recovered from serious drinking, are miracles of mental health. But we have seen remarkable transformations in our bodies. Hardly one of our crowd now shows any mark of dissipation.
But this does not mean that we disregard human health measures. God has abundantly supplied this world with fine doctors, psychologists, and practitioners of various kinds. Do not hesitate to take your health problems to such persons. Most of them give freely of themselves, that their fellows may enjoy sound minds and bodies. Try to remember that though God has wrought miracles among us, we should never belittle a good doctor or psychiatrist. Their services are often indispensable in treating a newcomer and following his case afterward.
I know of several other people whom this has happened to. One is dead from suicide. One went from being independent and productive to now living back home with her parents and not able to hold down a job. Several others have made suicide attempts or not been able to find any stability again with medication after stopping it for that period of time.
That said, I do have to say that yes, the 12 Steps do help with situational depression and anxiety but I don't consider myself or anyone else in AA qualified to determine which type of mental health issue someone is having to tell them that they should only use the 12 Steps and not seek outside help. I would rather see them alive and seeking help than dead from suicide because I decided to play God with their life.
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Originally Posted by LexieCat
I think the key is just what nandm said. My own depression and anxiety were directly attributable to my drinking. They have gone away with my recovery from alcoholism and with my continued sobriety. BUT I know many people with serious mental health issues for whom the Steps alone were not enough. Their medications and other treatments could not work, however, as long as they were drinking.
Hope you find some relief, and peace, soon, Jf1. Hang in there. I think that in your heart of hearts you know that throwing away your sobriety would not be worth it.
Hope you find some relief, and peace, soon, Jf1. Hang in there. I think that in your heart of hearts you know that throwing away your sobriety would not be worth it.
Nonetheless, once I recovered, I no longer needed the meds. But I know one or two of the guys I am working with need them still. Whether it's long term or not, it's their doctor's call, not mine. So while I can share my experience with them about the depression and anxiety, that is where I stop. They will find their own way with this in conjunction with their doctor, as long as they are completely honest with them and with themselves.
And yes, to answer the OP - it's sooooooo worth it
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Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
Justfor1, I was brought up in the Catholic Faith, my parents died a long time ago but to them the Church, prayer and all of that was the answer to everything. They could never fathom why it did not have the same effect on me.
I kind of think AA is much lke that, those whose lives were transformed by it can't comprehend the fact that it doesn't have the same effect on everyone. Of course this isn't true of all AA members, some do understand that it's just not everyones cup of tea.
Anxiety, depression and all of those issues are very complicated problems to try to deal with. What works well for one person might not help another. When I threw in the towel on drinking and drugs it took a good 2 years for the anxiety and depression to completely lift. It was a gradual thing for me but for most it seems to happen a lot sooner. I used so many different things, I took the takes what works and leave the rest approach.
I used a lot of AA stuff even though I haven't been to a meeting in over 20years. I probably listened to every speaker tape Sandy Beach ever made. I could really relate to His story. I think the essence of it all is that we all have to find our own path, dance to our own music.
One of the tricks I found was to just quit fighting everything. If I was depressed, anxious, angry or whatever I would become one with it and acknowledge it without letting it take full control. It's hard to really explain but when you accept that what is, is it gets a lot easier.
It should never be forgotten, as nandm alluded to in her post, that there are a metric ton of mental health issues that have nothing to do with alcoholism. All mental health issues are not simply "untreated alcoholism" and anyone who claims they are is very ill-informed. I very seriously doubt that even the most ardent of the AA crowd would make such claims.
The only universal truth I have found, the only thing really written in stone is that there is absolutely nothing, no situation so dire that adding alcohol and drugs to the mix won't make it even worse in the long run. This thread has a lot of solid gold responses, the post nandm made 2 doors up says it all so well. I would nominate her response for an academy award, she covered the issue so well, hard to add much to what was already said.
Hang in there and stay strong Justfor1, it can be tough going at times. It's now 8 degrees here in PA and the thought of having to go thru all of the alcohol withdrawal nonsense even one more time is not in my deck of cards. I really hope you come to the same conclusion. All my best.
I kind of think AA is much lke that, those whose lives were transformed by it can't comprehend the fact that it doesn't have the same effect on everyone. Of course this isn't true of all AA members, some do understand that it's just not everyones cup of tea.
Anxiety, depression and all of those issues are very complicated problems to try to deal with. What works well for one person might not help another. When I threw in the towel on drinking and drugs it took a good 2 years for the anxiety and depression to completely lift. It was a gradual thing for me but for most it seems to happen a lot sooner. I used so many different things, I took the takes what works and leave the rest approach.
I used a lot of AA stuff even though I haven't been to a meeting in over 20years. I probably listened to every speaker tape Sandy Beach ever made. I could really relate to His story. I think the essence of it all is that we all have to find our own path, dance to our own music.
One of the tricks I found was to just quit fighting everything. If I was depressed, anxious, angry or whatever I would become one with it and acknowledge it without letting it take full control. It's hard to really explain but when you accept that what is, is it gets a lot easier.
It should never be forgotten, as nandm alluded to in her post, that there are a metric ton of mental health issues that have nothing to do with alcoholism. All mental health issues are not simply "untreated alcoholism" and anyone who claims they are is very ill-informed. I very seriously doubt that even the most ardent of the AA crowd would make such claims.
The only universal truth I have found, the only thing really written in stone is that there is absolutely nothing, no situation so dire that adding alcohol and drugs to the mix won't make it even worse in the long run. This thread has a lot of solid gold responses, the post nandm made 2 doors up says it all so well. I would nominate her response for an academy award, she covered the issue so well, hard to add much to what was already said.
Hang in there and stay strong Justfor1, it can be tough going at times. It's now 8 degrees here in PA and the thought of having to go thru all of the alcohol withdrawal nonsense even one more time is not in my deck of cards. I really hope you come to the same conclusion. All my best.
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I sure hope no one here would try to say AA is the only thing that one needs as a cure for mental health issue like major depression. I sure hope that isn't what I just read from some ardent AA supporters. What terrible advice that would be.
High on Life
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Been to Hell and Back
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Originally Posted by 2granddaughters
Once I began to address the fear, selfishness, selfpity and stubbornness, and started to work my program ..... my depression and suicidal thoughts commenced to drift away.
Literally all of my "mental health" issues are dealt with in the 12 Steps
All the best.
Bob R
Literally all of my "mental health" issues are dealt with in the 12 Steps
All the best.
Bob R
Originally Posted by Justfor1
That is literally the most dangerous advise I could have read. That statement you made could get people killed. Thankfully, now that I am sober I can dismiss this advice & move on.
But just remember whoever’s advice you decide to follow, that you actually follow it or it won’t work. When your doctor says they can’t treat your depression, because you are still drinking, you can’t get mad at them for this. That’s the way it works, you can’t get a clear diagnosis from someone who is actively using. You have to be willing to actually take the recommended treatment or you are just wasting everybody’s time.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
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Plenty of inspirational messages here. But the real answer is "I don't know". I don't know if sobriety is worth it. But, I'm sure as hell not going back to the way I was when I was drinking. If I did, I'd be dead by now. And being alive is a positive thing. I'd prefer it to death. If I was dead I wouldn't have seen the mountains in Costa Rica, the beaches in Bali, or the plazas in Spain. If I was dead I wouldn't have seen the birth and childhood of my wonderful niece. If I was dead I wouldn't be just coming home from a nice cup of coffee at a coffee shop on a snowy Chicago morning.
So yeah, I guess sobriety, to me, is worth it. It's hard to see the big picture sometimes. I hope you can find out what works best for you. Good luck.
So yeah, I guess sobriety, to me, is worth it. It's hard to see the big picture sometimes. I hope you can find out what works best for you. Good luck.
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