Joe Nerv

Spoke at a meeting last night. Before the I meeting talked with some people I had seen around for many years, but never really got to know. One older guy said he had 40 days today. But he had 34 years up until thanksgiving. He told me he wasn't thinking about drinking, it wasn't on his mind... he was at a party, and poured himself some coke. There was a bottle of vodka next to the coke and he said the hell with it, and without a second thought poured some in and drank it. Then another. Then straight vodka, and went almost instantly into a blackout. Woke up the next day and went to a meeting. Hasn't drank since.

I asked if he stopped doing anything, stopped going to meeting, and he said, no. Was doing the same thing he's been doing to stay sober for 34 years. Didn't have time to get into the nitty gritty as I'm sure there must have been something going on... but dang!

Reminds me that despite what some people believe, we really do only have a daily reprieve.

Xune

Don't over complicate things.

He made the choice to drink alcohol.

Yeah, for real...it was a choice.

Boleo

I was stuck in a relapse cycle for over 2 years. I don't ever once remember making a choice to go back to drinking. Alcohol was simply a Higher Power for me. We it tempted me - I drank, pure and simple.

After having a Spiritual Awakening that gave me a new Higher Power, I realized I still have no choice. Drinking Alcohol never even enters my head. I don't think about drinking. I don't think about not-drinking. There is nothing to choose between.

My guess is the guy quit doing doing whatever attracted a Higher Power into his life for 34 years without realizing it. He simply was resting on his laurels.

paul99

I think his alcoholism made the choice for him. An alcoholic like me has lost the power of choice. If I could choose, I wouldn't be an alcoholic.

I was thinking on this, and for me, I know that I often have to do more than I regularly do at times to say sober, especially if I am resting on my laurels. But obviously something was missing there, to have 34 years and then jump on the vodka....a lesson there for sure.

Sapling

Just like the book tells us...You can add patient to baffling. I would say your guess is right.

Zube

Reminds me of the story of the AA who went through a divorce, but did not relapse, then lost his child, but did not relapse, then got fired, but did not relapse, then put on his shoe and broke a shoestring, and relapsed.

I agree with Sapling, Alcohol is VERY patient. And if you are not spiritually fit, it will win.

Zube

Fernaceman

Cunning, baffling, powerful indeed.

freshstart57

I wonder what he might have told you the day before Thanksgiving had you asked him about the state of his spiritual condition? To think really hard, and answer if he had stopped attracting his God into his life?

He chose to have a drink, just as any of us could do. Nothing baffling here.

bbthumper

Indeed. I do not have the power of choice when it comes to drink. The choice I have now is to die an alcoholic death or live a spiritual life. The better choice seems obvious to me. By doing my best to live according to the will of my Higher Power, I need not worry about making a choice to drink or not. It is not my issue to deal with.

The Book tells us we will drink again if we fail to enlarge our spiritual life. There are plenty of folks who are active in the fellowship and going to several meetings a week who are failing to enlarge their spiritual life. I dont see any other reason an alcoholic in AA would drink. In my experience, a spiritually fit person will not drink alcohol.

Sapling

I guess you would would have to be living in the solution for 34 years to know if it's baffling or not.

soberlicious

Yeah, I told the cops that something came over me. I was in the store, I saw the ring, picked it up and put it in my purse, and left the store without paying. Really no fault of my own, can't figure out how it happened (?!)
Or my other infamous line "I have no idea what happened....all the sudden I was naked". My husband seemed to think I should have had some control over that, but he doesn't understand.

It would seem scary to live in such a way that no matter what you do, you could be ambushed at any given moment by a rogue bottle of vodka that put a gun to your head and forces you to drink it.

Sapling

That would seem pretty scary....I'm glad I don't have to deal with that.

freshstart57

I think that is soberlicious' point right there. Not only do you not have to deal with that rogue vodka bottle that happens to be fully armed, nobody does, despite the claims made of behaving without conscious choice.

It is a choice we each of us have over that first drink.

Xune

I don't drink, will not drink and have only the self to rely on. I've no HP to speak of.

I am soulless, yet I choose to not drink. The only time alcohol has any power over me is when I choose to have that first drink.

I am not a victim, but a complicit party in this addiction.

When not under the chemical influence of intoxication and we are physiologically sober, it is a choice of human will to drink.

A choice to drink or not drink.

Sapling

You're not in AA right?..So you wouldn't know this promise comes true...If we work for it.



And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone - even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

I know it comes true...I'm living proof.

soberlicious

I am not spiritual, but indeed the bolded things have happened to me as a result of eliminating alcohol from my life.

Except that, for me, rather than: "That is how I react so long as I keep in fit spiritual condition." Would be : "That is how I react regardless of whether I keep in fit spiritual condition." That way my addiction can't catch me on a "bad spiritual day" and ambush me. Spirituality is the cornerstone of a happy, healthy, full life for many people, but consider that making it a condition for sobriety can be a set-up for failure.

bbthumper

This may be your truth, but it is not the truth for many of us.

TheEnd

I thought you were only powerless after you put the alcohol in your body. Until then, you do have a choice, you can go to a meeting, call your sponsor, pray to your higher power, call another sober person, read the Big Book, etc...If there was no choice, then any of us could be ambused by a bottle of Vodka at any minute as Soberlicious put it..The only baffeling part about the whole thing is that he drank after 34 years of sobriety. When people make excuses such as this, it makes absolutely no sense.

bbthumper

There is often a misunderstanding with this concept. The part of alcoholism that really gets us, according to the Big Book, is the mental obsession. THe insaniity which proceeds the first drink. This is the thing that causes me to take a drink even after I have told myself " I will not drink today." It creates the illusion that I just changed my mind and decided to take the drink when in reality it is just plain insanity. An alcoholic like me has no mental defense against the first drink. That defense had to come from a Higher power. In and of myself I am still powerless over alcohol, but I have tapped a source of power which is not mine, but available to me which provides the defense against the first drink. I am not sober today because I chose not to drink. I am sober today because I did what was necessary for me to grow spiritually.

soberlicious

I respect that.

For me, if I make my sobriety contingent on anything other than "not drinking no matter what", then my sobriety is tenuous. Contingences like spiritual fitness can be subject to change, and my sobriety with it. No thanks.

No matter what means no matter what. I can be a lazy heathen...but never a drunk lazy heathen. Or I can be an enlightened yogi, but never a drunk enlightened yogi. Either way, or any which way, will not determine my alcohol comsumption, because I don't drink. Ever.

That's just how I roll. I recognize that others feel differently.