New here. Just wanted to say hi
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 109
Originally Posted by ZombieAttack 
Day 10. Feel OK ish.
Managed to ride home from work at about 60% capacity, which is better than before
Managed to ride home from work at about 60% capacity, which is better than before
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Haha, I have been at work since day 2. Thinking back, I was definitely around 8% capacity that day!
I am sure I will laugh when I look back on all this. Maybe.
The whole time while drinking I managed to maintain serious BMX, weight training, and road bike racing activities, which in retrospect probably mean I am a lot healthier than I could be, considering all the booze!
Anyway, I will keep at it, and keep boring you with my updates!
If anybody else is reading this, and is thinking about doing it, please DO! It is not easy, and needs constant work, but you will feel a lot better.
I am sure I will laugh when I look back on all this. Maybe.
The whole time while drinking I managed to maintain serious BMX, weight training, and road bike racing activities, which in retrospect probably mean I am a lot healthier than I could be, considering all the booze!
Anyway, I will keep at it, and keep boring you with my updates!
If anybody else is reading this, and is thinking about doing it, please DO! It is not easy, and needs constant work, but you will feel a lot better.
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Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Day 12.
Feel like having no alcohol has become almost normal for me. Not totally better either physically or emotionally, but compared to what I was like before, I certainly am better.
Got told I looked 'refreshed' yesterday by somebody, out of the blue, which must be a good sign.
Related to the booze saving of money I was going on about in another thread, I have a Google Drive spreadsheet on the go, which I update everyday with how much I decided I used to spend on alcohol. Even only 12 days in, I have saved a hell of a lot.
Sweet.
Will post again soon, with more tales of sobriety!
Cheers, and thanks for helping me this far. This website is utterly invaluable.
Feel like having no alcohol has become almost normal for me. Not totally better either physically or emotionally, but compared to what I was like before, I certainly am better.
Got told I looked 'refreshed' yesterday by somebody, out of the blue, which must be a good sign.
Related to the booze saving of money I was going on about in another thread, I have a Google Drive spreadsheet on the go, which I update everyday with how much I decided I used to spend on alcohol. Even only 12 days in, I have saved a hell of a lot.
Sweet.
Will post again soon, with more tales of sobriety!
Cheers, and thanks for helping me this far. This website is utterly invaluable.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Day 13.
Not a lot to report, which is probably a good thing. Felt a bit grumpy when I got to work this morning, but that may have been due to some **** driver nearly taking me out on my bike. I think that one is allowed!
Liver area is feeling better; it does feel like it is still there sometimes, but this is becoming more and more infrequent, which is good. Skin feels OK; I had a few days where I got a lot of spots around my nose and back, but that has calmed slightly.
I have been invited to the usual round of new years parties, and have accepted; these are always massive ****-ups so it will be interested to see them from the other side. Of course, I will not be drinking.
Evenings; I notice I have been getting naturally sleepy around 10.30pm every night now. Perhaps this is the natural time my body sleeps! I will keep monitoring it and get back to you when I find a pattern.
Cheers!
Not a lot to report, which is probably a good thing. Felt a bit grumpy when I got to work this morning, but that may have been due to some **** driver nearly taking me out on my bike. I think that one is allowed!
Liver area is feeling better; it does feel like it is still there sometimes, but this is becoming more and more infrequent, which is good. Skin feels OK; I had a few days where I got a lot of spots around my nose and back, but that has calmed slightly.
I have been invited to the usual round of new years parties, and have accepted; these are always massive ****-ups so it will be interested to see them from the other side. Of course, I will not be drinking.
Evenings; I notice I have been getting naturally sleepy around 10.30pm every night now. Perhaps this is the natural time my body sleeps! I will keep monitoring it and get back to you when I find a pattern.
Cheers!
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: FL
Posts: 1,072
Hi Zombie, you are doing great! Keep up the good work. Join us crazy runners, swimmers, cyclists over in the Kicking Asphalt thread. Its amazing the support you get here.
You sound like you would fit right in! I am just over one year sober. I never thought I could ever go without drinking. It consumed my every thought. I also ran, worked out and did triathlons the last few year while drinking...granted I stunk...but I did it.
I must say I feel amazing. It tools several months to "figure out who I am." I had to find new friends really. Now I run with two groups and joined a new gym with a triathlon club. Right now I started training for a half marathon in Feb. I NEVER could have made a commitment like that.
I guess the point I want to make is it just keeps getting better and better. Every day and every month. The anxiety passes and peace comes. It is amazing.
This site has been a life saver. Keep reading and posting.
You sound like you would fit right in! I am just over one year sober. I never thought I could ever go without drinking. It consumed my every thought. I also ran, worked out and did triathlons the last few year while drinking...granted I stunk...but I did it.
I must say I feel amazing. It tools several months to "figure out who I am." I had to find new friends really. Now I run with two groups and joined a new gym with a triathlon club. Right now I started training for a half marathon in Feb. I NEVER could have made a commitment like that.
I guess the point I want to make is it just keeps getting better and better. Every day and every month. The anxiety passes and peace comes. It is amazing.
This site has been a life saver. Keep reading and posting.
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Posts: 157
Day 14.
Felt very low last night- may be because it was friday night, and I have a week off work. Usually I would have been getting drunk, but I felt at a loose end all evening and kind of lonely.
Still, didnt drink.
Felt very low last night- may be because it was friday night, and I have a week off work. Usually I would have been getting drunk, but I felt at a loose end all evening and kind of lonely.
Still, didnt drink.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 109
Originally Posted by ZombieAttack
Day 14.
Felt very low last night- may be because it was friday night, and I have a week off work. Usually I would have been getting drunk, but I felt at a loose end all evening and kind of lonely.
Still, didnt drink.
Felt very low last night- may be because it was friday night, and I have a week off work. Usually I would have been getting drunk, but I felt at a loose end all evening and kind of lonely.
Still, didnt drink.
It all sucks.
Stay sober if you have no women involved. it seems relationships make everything 10 fold worse.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Sorry you feel that way dude.
While I was indeed feeling low last night, I took an emotional step back and realised that it was all part of the recovery process, and I just need to stick with it.
Had a good morning so far, which I would not have been able to do if I was hungover, so alls well that ends well.
While I was indeed feeling low last night, I took an emotional step back and realised that it was all part of the recovery process, and I just need to stick with it.
Had a good morning so far, which I would not have been able to do if I was hungover, so alls well that ends well.
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So thinking back over the past 14 days (can't believe I have got this far, to be honest) something occurred to me;
A lot of the habit of drinking for me was just that; a habit. The first few days, I had to consciously walk myself past the convenience store where I would ordinarily have dropped in on the way to the train station for a beer. I then had to consciously tell myself it was normal not to have a stomach full of activating alcohol as I stood on the train for the 16 minutes into town, etc.
First few times were hard, odd, paranoid, curious, self-conscious, etc., then it got easier, for all manner of experiences.
I realise what I am doing is basically re-programming my behaviour not to include alcohol. Since realising this, I have kind of made a semi-conscious list of actions and experiences that I have to 'reset' to their pre-alcohol state. There are also perhaps more difficult things which have no pre-alcohol version that I will need to create sober memories and habits for; this may be more difficult, or it may be a laugh. I will just have to find out.
Anyway, I am coming to the end of day 14 now, and can see light at the end of the tunnel, to a degree.
Obviously I am also having the standard feelings of "why did I do that to myself / why did I start in the first place / I have a lot of catching up to do" etc., but I guess that happens to everyone.
So there you go.
A lot of the habit of drinking for me was just that; a habit. The first few days, I had to consciously walk myself past the convenience store where I would ordinarily have dropped in on the way to the train station for a beer. I then had to consciously tell myself it was normal not to have a stomach full of activating alcohol as I stood on the train for the 16 minutes into town, etc.
First few times were hard, odd, paranoid, curious, self-conscious, etc., then it got easier, for all manner of experiences.
I realise what I am doing is basically re-programming my behaviour not to include alcohol. Since realising this, I have kind of made a semi-conscious list of actions and experiences that I have to 'reset' to their pre-alcohol state. There are also perhaps more difficult things which have no pre-alcohol version that I will need to create sober memories and habits for; this may be more difficult, or it may be a laugh. I will just have to find out.
Anyway, I am coming to the end of day 14 now, and can see light at the end of the tunnel, to a degree.
Obviously I am also having the standard feelings of "why did I do that to myself / why did I start in the first place / I have a lot of catching up to do" etc., but I guess that happens to everyone.
So there you go.
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Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Day 15.
Feel pretty normal today, which is where I wanted to be.
Things I have noticed over the past few days;
-Mentally I have been up and down a bit. Nothing massive, but definitely not 100% stable. This comes in waves. Conversely, at times I feel very good.
-Physically, my liver area which was aching has been giving me less bother. Now, I am no doctor, but I can assume this is basically a 'cooling' down of things as my body rids itself of all the crap. I am not getting any increasing discomfort, so am treating this as a good sign.
-I have regained some of my sporting prowess. Left a guy for dead yesterday on the 10km route back to my apartment from where I was riding. Would not have had the spirit or power to do that before yesterday.
-Eating; I have been getting increasingly hungry, and have been craving all manner of healthy food, which I have been allowing myself, of course. Tonnes of vegetables, raw fish, fresh meats, etc. Not felt like any processed foods or anything like that.
-Have had the occasional, 'hmm, a beer would be good right now' feelings which I have had to fight. Not really a huge battle, but did need to stop myself.
-Still finding myself getting irked by small things; when this happens, I seem to revert in symptoms to the early part of my detox; aching body, and very agro / paranoid. This lasts for an hour or so then fades. Weird, and no doubt a psychological reaction which leads to a currently programmed physical response.
-Smells; I am finding my sense of smell and pheromone responses have been heightened / restored. This is both a blessing and a curse; catching the edge of a beautiful woman's perfume as she drifts past is having more of an effect, if you get my meaning!
I will post more as it happens.
Wishing all of you doing the same as me all the luck in the world. I can't say it has been exactly easy so far, but certainly has been interesting.
Feel pretty normal today, which is where I wanted to be.
Things I have noticed over the past few days;
-Mentally I have been up and down a bit. Nothing massive, but definitely not 100% stable. This comes in waves. Conversely, at times I feel very good.
-Physically, my liver area which was aching has been giving me less bother. Now, I am no doctor, but I can assume this is basically a 'cooling' down of things as my body rids itself of all the crap. I am not getting any increasing discomfort, so am treating this as a good sign.
-I have regained some of my sporting prowess. Left a guy for dead yesterday on the 10km route back to my apartment from where I was riding. Would not have had the spirit or power to do that before yesterday.
-Eating; I have been getting increasingly hungry, and have been craving all manner of healthy food, which I have been allowing myself, of course. Tonnes of vegetables, raw fish, fresh meats, etc. Not felt like any processed foods or anything like that.
-Have had the occasional, 'hmm, a beer would be good right now' feelings which I have had to fight. Not really a huge battle, but did need to stop myself.
-Still finding myself getting irked by small things; when this happens, I seem to revert in symptoms to the early part of my detox; aching body, and very agro / paranoid. This lasts for an hour or so then fades. Weird, and no doubt a psychological reaction which leads to a currently programmed physical response.
-Smells; I am finding my sense of smell and pheromone responses have been heightened / restored. This is both a blessing and a curse; catching the edge of a beautiful woman's perfume as she drifts past is having more of an effect, if you get my meaning!
I will post more as it happens.
Wishing all of you doing the same as me all the luck in the world. I can't say it has been exactly easy so far, but certainly has been interesting.
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Day 16
Felt pretty trashed this morning. I think I may have attempted to go a bit hard on my bike too soon. I did 50km on day 14 and another 50km on day 15, with some pretty intense sections throughout. Nothing compares to what I was doing earlier in the year, and I have been eating normally, but combined with the cold I picked up last week, I think I made a mistake to go out like I did.
My body aches a bit, and I feel a bit down. No idea if this is to do with hitting the training too hard, the cold I have, or the fact that I am in the middle of the early days of recovery, but whatever it is, I am definitely not 100%
Completely do not feel like any alcohol though, and haven't had a single twinge of a craving for the past 2 days which is positive, I suppose.
Just going to have to sit this one out and rest more than I think I need to, I suppose.
Hope the rest of you are enjoying fulfilling your genetic potentials as members of the toughest club out there, the 'Stay-Cleans'!
Felt pretty trashed this morning. I think I may have attempted to go a bit hard on my bike too soon. I did 50km on day 14 and another 50km on day 15, with some pretty intense sections throughout. Nothing compares to what I was doing earlier in the year, and I have been eating normally, but combined with the cold I picked up last week, I think I made a mistake to go out like I did.
My body aches a bit, and I feel a bit down. No idea if this is to do with hitting the training too hard, the cold I have, or the fact that I am in the middle of the early days of recovery, but whatever it is, I am definitely not 100%
Completely do not feel like any alcohol though, and haven't had a single twinge of a craving for the past 2 days which is positive, I suppose.
Just going to have to sit this one out and rest more than I think I need to, I suppose.
Hope the rest of you are enjoying fulfilling your genetic potentials as members of the toughest club out there, the 'Stay-Cleans'!
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Day 17;
Woke up feeling a bit better. I suspect my ill-feelings yesterday were indeed a culmination of everything.
Again, not feeling perfect today, but better than yesterday.
More stuff I have noticed;
-Skin feels good.
-Eyes look a lot more sparkly.
-I have found myself becoming a lot more willing to go out and meet people for stuff that doesn't involve getting drunk. This used to always have me mentally planning when I could get away and find a drink, but not now.
I have been considering making a finely detailed diary of the times when my emotions go up or down, if anybody would be interested? I might just go ahead and make it anyway, but if anyone is interested in seeing it for research / reference purposes, I would be happy to put it in Google Drive. Thought it might be interesting to see if there were any patterns.
Woke up feeling a bit better. I suspect my ill-feelings yesterday were indeed a culmination of everything.
Again, not feeling perfect today, but better than yesterday.
More stuff I have noticed;
-Skin feels good.
-Eyes look a lot more sparkly.
-I have found myself becoming a lot more willing to go out and meet people for stuff that doesn't involve getting drunk. This used to always have me mentally planning when I could get away and find a drink, but not now.
I have been considering making a finely detailed diary of the times when my emotions go up or down, if anybody would be interested? I might just go ahead and make it anyway, but if anyone is interested in seeing it for research / reference purposes, I would be happy to put it in Google Drive. Thought it might be interesting to see if there were any patterns.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by ZombieAttack
More stuff I have noticed;
-Skin feels good.
-Eyes look a lot more sparkly.
-I have found myself becoming a lot more willing to go out and meet people for stuff that doesn't involve getting drunk. This used to always have me mentally planning when I could get away and find a drink, but not now.
-Skin feels good.
-Eyes look a lot more sparkly.
-I have found myself becoming a lot more willing to go out and meet people for stuff that doesn't involve getting drunk. This used to always have me mentally planning when I could get away and find a drink, but not now.
Amazing how much alcohol can rip your body apart and how much the human body can tolerate.
Congrats on 17 days!
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Posts: 157
Yeah, I am amazed by how well my body has bounced back. It is incredible just how much abuse the human body can take and still function.
Other observations;
-I am drinking a LOT of fizzy water. Seems to hit a similar mouth sensation point that beer used to (and has the added benefit of being, well, water!)
-I crave vegetables more than before.
-My waves of feeling down are accompanied by anxiety / paranoia and also physical discomfort. This seems to flow over me in waves. When I don't have this feeling, I feel fine. I am attempting to monitor this to see if I can put a finger on any triggers.
-I am getting a lot of memories from when I was young coming back; almost as if the alcohol was suppressing things for a long time. This is not entirely unpleasant, but I do get moments of longing and sadness.
Other observations;
-I am drinking a LOT of fizzy water. Seems to hit a similar mouth sensation point that beer used to (and has the added benefit of being, well, water!)
-I crave vegetables more than before.
-My waves of feeling down are accompanied by anxiety / paranoia and also physical discomfort. This seems to flow over me in waves. When I don't have this feeling, I feel fine. I am attempting to monitor this to see if I can put a finger on any triggers.
-I am getting a lot of memories from when I was young coming back; almost as if the alcohol was suppressing things for a long time. This is not entirely unpleasant, but I do get moments of longing and sadness.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 157
Day 18.
Yeah, feel OK today. Feel like I have resigned myself to the fact that it is going to be a very long time until I feel 'superb', but going on OK,
Bumped into a guy I had not seen for getting on 4 years this morning, in a convenience store. I was buying a fancy coffee, some fizzy water and some eggs while he was on his way to work.
Last time I saw him, I was in the middle of my drinking, and used to work with him, so he probably knew I was on the bottle (can). This morning however, we had a perfectly normal exchange, and he mentioned that I looked well (seemed genuine about it, rather than a mere pleasantry). That cheered me up a bit, despite having conflicting feelings about what his memories of me may have been.
Onwards and upwards though, eh!
Yeah, feel OK today. Feel like I have resigned myself to the fact that it is going to be a very long time until I feel 'superb', but going on OK,
Bumped into a guy I had not seen for getting on 4 years this morning, in a convenience store. I was buying a fancy coffee, some fizzy water and some eggs while he was on his way to work.
Last time I saw him, I was in the middle of my drinking, and used to work with him, so he probably knew I was on the bottle (can). This morning however, we had a perfectly normal exchange, and he mentioned that I looked well (seemed genuine about it, rather than a mere pleasantry). That cheered me up a bit, despite having conflicting feelings about what his memories of me may have been.
Onwards and upwards though, eh!
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Toronto, Ontario
Posts: 2,408
I found emotionally I was up and down like a rollercoaster for the first 3 months or so. Those feelings or loneliness, longings, sadness....they happen, and it's how we react to them is what is important. Stopping the booze entering the system is just the beginning. I found early on a journal helped me document how I was emotionally, and to get it out of my mind. It's quite funny (now) reading back then what I was going through. It was scary at the time, but now I realize I was just going through what we all go through - fear. Fear of a new way of living, fear of going back out, fear of what if I fail, etc.
The body does recover, for sure, and with it a sense of being more alive. The liver area used to throb all the time - I like the fact I don't have to put ice packs on there any more!
Good luck - keep posting
The body does recover, for sure, and with it a sense of being more alive. The liver area used to throb all the time - I like the fact I don't have to put ice packs on there any more!
Good luck - keep posting
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