Would appreciate your perspective from the other side of the fence
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Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: WI
Posts: 195
Would appreciate your perspective from the other side of the fence
My stbxh has abused alcohol for several years and denies he is an alcoholic. He believes he just drinks too much at times to which he has no problem with. As part of our divorce (though not yet finalized), I give him a breathalyzer before and after he is with our two teens. Today at 12 noon when our son was going to visit he blew a .04 (though I am not sure of the accuracy of the breathalyzer). Nontheless, my stbxh claims he hadn’t had a drink since going out shooting pool the night before. My question is does anyone know how much a 5’7” 210 pound individual would need to drink if he hadn’t had a drink for 11 or more hours (approximately)?
I believe the answer will help me decide how I am proceeding from here since the ball is in my court. Any advice is appreciated as well.
The rest of the story is he agreed to be evaluated by an addiction counselor if this were to occur. The long and short at this point is he states now he knows he can’t drink the night before so will I please give one more chance since he is not willing to cooperate with an addiction counselor because he doesn’t believe he is an addict. He believes he made a mistake in judgement that won’t occur again. Also, he adds he has already been to an addiction counselor (true) and doesn't want to throw away thousands of dollars for nothing.
I believe the answer will help me decide how I am proceeding from here since the ball is in my court. Any advice is appreciated as well.
The rest of the story is he agreed to be evaluated by an addiction counselor if this were to occur. The long and short at this point is he states now he knows he can’t drink the night before so will I please give one more chance since he is not willing to cooperate with an addiction counselor because he doesn’t believe he is an addict. He believes he made a mistake in judgement that won’t occur again. Also, he adds he has already been to an addiction counselor (true) and doesn't want to throw away thousands of dollars for nothing.
From what I know, he could still have a BAC of that level assuming he drank until like 3am. Here's an article: How Long Does it Take for Alcohol to Clear Your System?
No doubt he could have that in his system from the previous night. I blew that in jail in the morning after sitting all night, and I quit drinking before midnight, so yeah.
If he can function at that level, he's a drunk. Its up to him to decide if he's an alcoholic, but I can tell you most normal people would be wrecked with that level of consumption.
If he can function at that level, he's a drunk. Its up to him to decide if he's an alcoholic, but I can tell you most normal people would be wrecked with that level of consumption.
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Colorado
Posts: 43
No doubt he could have that in his system from the previous night. I blew that in jail in the morning after sitting all night, and I quit drinking before midnight, so yeah.
If he can function at that level, he's a drunk. Its up to him to decide if he's an alcoholic, but I can tell you most normal people would be wrecked with that level of consumption.
If he can function at that level, he's a drunk. Its up to him to decide if he's an alcoholic, but I can tell you most normal people would be wrecked with that level of consumption.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Pine Grove, PA
Posts: 146
I was a daily drinker at the end and I would not have had a .00 BAL ever. Not knowing his habits I can only say as my liver was overwhelmed with alcohol it stayed in my system at higher levels than if I drank occasionally.
I would be more concerned about the denial that there might be a problem.
I would be more concerned about the denial that there might be a problem.
Yes he could blow that, however, if the wording is as you stated then he should
have been denied visitation.
As JF1 said there have been quite a few folks that have received DUI's on their
way to work after drinking the night before.
As to him seeing an 'addiction counselor' it would depend on how willing he is to
be HONEST with said counselor to get an 'accurate' qualified opinion.
He is in denial about his alcohol problems. Since your children are in their 'teens'
and if one or both have cell phones, you can instruct them to call you if he chooses
to drink during the visitation and you can pick them up. Or to call you if he is be-
coming verbally abusive. They are old enought to know when their father's be-
havior might be jeopardizing them.
I know you are worried about the amount of time your teens spend with their father,
based on their father's past actions. I believe that your teens are more 'aware' of
the whole situation than you may think they are. After all they too have lived with
his alcoholism and I do believe that if something was 'off' with the visitation they
would call 'mom' to come and get them.
Sending healing thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
Love and hugs,
have been denied visitation.
As JF1 said there have been quite a few folks that have received DUI's on their
way to work after drinking the night before.
As to him seeing an 'addiction counselor' it would depend on how willing he is to
be HONEST with said counselor to get an 'accurate' qualified opinion.
He is in denial about his alcohol problems. Since your children are in their 'teens'
and if one or both have cell phones, you can instruct them to call you if he chooses
to drink during the visitation and you can pick them up. Or to call you if he is be-
coming verbally abusive. They are old enought to know when their father's be-
havior might be jeopardizing them.
I know you are worried about the amount of time your teens spend with their father,
based on their father's past actions. I believe that your teens are more 'aware' of
the whole situation than you may think they are. After all they too have lived with
his alcoholism and I do believe that if something was 'off' with the visitation they
would call 'mom' to come and get them.
Sending healing thoughts and prayers for you and your family.
Love and hugs,
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