eldorado9288

Hello my name is Dustin and im an alcoholic LOL, ive been a daily drinker since the age of 14 used to just smoke weed and then got put on probation so i turned to the drink. im 24 now ive had 3 duis in the last 5 years should be more like 300x3 haha not funny but its the truth i rarely ever drove without drinking unfortunately.. anyways i quit drinking on 2/21/2011 soon after my grandfather died which i thought was odd cause i woulda thought the opposite im currently in a custody battle for my daughter who is 3. i think the custody my gpa passing and just being tired of feeling like **** lead to my quitting. my problem is nothing seems fun anymore.. drinking played a major part of everything i did. i basically have no friends besides my mother an father and daughter ofcourse lol. ive always had a problem making friends as im pretty shy and tend to think alot about what i say before i say which normally leads to me saying nothing i just have a problem meeting an getting to know ppl women and men. i think a gf would be nice but as i said i have problems in that dept.. basically what im asking is what can i do to keep myself interested in sobriety? im not craving the alcohol but im not enjoying the sobriety either

sorry if this is confusing im not really sure how to word what i want to say but any help or suggestions are greatly appreciated

trailrunrbyday

you seem very sweet and genuine and you have put your daughter as priority and stopped drinking. You should be so proud!!!! I am a super extrovert (not good...life of the party type of thing so giving up drinking is giving me unique challenges that way). What are your interests? What do you do for work?

DAB

Try AA meetings, you can meet new friends there.

eldorado9288

Thank you! that made me feel good lol and yes i am proud of my self i made up my mind to quit something that i couldnt imagine living without and have kept up with it. as far as intrests go i like to fish camp being outdoors computers. ive gone fishing a few times this year and it just wasnt the same i didnt get that sense of enjoyment without drinking like i said i started at a young age so most everything ive been in to also revolved around drinking. right now im unemployed which i know doesnt help matters i am looking for work but not having any luck currently

" Try AA meetings, you can meet new friends there. "

i am not into the 12 step programs i do currently attend aa tho. like i stated i have problems getting to know ppl. i takes alot for me to considor someone a friend. Not that its such an honor or anything lol im just not an outgoing person i am very nice but i dont think i come off as friendly and i dont trust ppl easily which i must be able to do to considor someone a friend.. anyways the ppl at the meeting i go to are mostly older ppl the younger ppl there come off as phoney to me like they are just there playing the game saying what ppl want to hear or something

Dee74

Hi and welcome Dustin

Congratulations on your sober time

Recovery was two parts for me - one was not drinking...the other was building a life I was happy in and where I didn't want to drink.

Do you have any hobbies or interests?

that can be a good way to meet new friends...and the common interest/passion can help with the shyness, in my experience

D

eldorado9288

Hi D Thanks what you say about being 2 parts really makes alot of sense for some reason ive never heard it put that way but its a great way to put it i guess im stuch at step 2 lol i like to fish camp being outdoors computers. ive gone fishing a few times this year and it just wasnt the same i didnt get that sense of enjoyment without drinking it makes sense that common interest will help with making friends but im just extra shy i guess lol idk especially with women kind embarrassing to admit but is more than being shy its also a confidence an self worth like why would she be interested in me typa thing

thanks for your comment tho the 2 stage thing gives me a bit of hope ty

Dee74

If you're friends are the same ones you've always had and they're hard drinkers, that can be a little hard.

I found a few new friends tho - or reconnected with old ones who I lost contact with when I started drinking heavily...

D

eldorado9288

i dont have any friends the ones i had were not drinkers tho i always drank alone but the ones i thought were my friends were big time phoneys an 2 faced as could be an i cant tolerate that in a friend so they are not any more

Itchy

Dustin,
If you have been drinking since 14 you have missed getting all of the good social skills. You are not alone, but you don't have to stay that way. Now I am gonna brainstorm for you a bit because another perspective can help, but you hafe to do it. The idea is to realize the self imposed limits and excuses we make to avoid repeating poor attempts from when we were 12. If this helps a bit then sit down and write a list of your own as fast as you can even if what comes to mind seems silly. Do that until you have at least 50 entries. Then go through and cross off the obvious.
Join toastmasters and work at it
Toastmasters International - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Take a community college class
Gateway Community & Technical College
Sign up and attend sports camps for your three year old
Parks and Recreation Programs | City of Florence, KY
Take scuba classes, flying lessons, buy a small used RV and camp.
Before you think you can't afford any of it or more, think again. All the booze money and legal fees are over with.
Cmon! Help yourself and others out here. Make a bucket list and share it.

IdaNeedHelp

You need to find things to make YOU happy. Hobbies, sports, church, college, etc. Going back to your old ways will only lead you down a dark, dark road. Life is not always sunshine and roses, so you need to find what makes YOU happy. You are young and have your entire life ahead of you. What a blessing. Please make good choices for yourself and your little girl.

~Ida

CarolD

Congratulations on your sober time....I'm glad you got thru the
early days....excellent.....

Itchy

How are you doing today Dustin?

eldorado9288

Im doing ok today thanks for asking and thanks for your great advice above. Earlier today i filled out the application for gateway college and am waiting for someone to call me back to set up an appointment to see what all i need to do and what all i can qualify for and that kinda thing. ive been busy today with my daughter whos sick with a fever. ill look into the other things that you mentioned also tonight maybe. thanks again to everyone

Itchy

Terrific!
You don't waste any time once you get yourself pointed in a direction! Good for you! And thanks for letting me know. Kepp us posted as you go, and read some posts you might help answer too!

eldorado9288

Will do thanks again

dmc1960

I am the adult child of an alcoholic father. I have wished I was so special that he could have stopped drinking for ME! Unfortunately, that is not the case. I will pray for your little girl. We are so easily damaged...for life. Please wake up, give your little princess
the life I wished I would have had. God bless.

Itchy

Dustin,
How is your little angel doing today?

ForMyGirls

Thanks for that. I needed it...