Vick23

I went out and had a couple drinks a couple months ago after a little over a year of sobriety. I haven't drank since and I have stopped going to meetings. I am getting the urge to go out and having a couple of drinks, but I am embarrassed of going to a meeting and picking up one of those stupid ******* white chips and making the walk of shame. I figure it's just easier to stay sober without all the AA drama and judgement.

MrsKing

Whatever works for you is the best way, Vick23.

As long as you feel like you're strong in your sobriety then it doesn't matter what you do or how you do it.

Don't be embarrassed, it's not productive. You should be pleased with yourself that you haven't drank since a couple of months ago - that's a wonderful achievement.

All the best and welcome!

FredG

Funny, I've been to thousands of meetings, different locally, and haven't seen anyone forced to take a "walk of shame". I've seen lots applauded for having the courage and hoots-pa to keep on trying though. You don't even have to take a chip. There are NO musts in AA.

Sadly I have heard of people judging others unfairly especially considering where we've all come from, but unfortunatly some are definitely sicker than others.

Your choice though - I would, however, look seriously at what led you back to the bottle. I can say with absolute certainty, that it wasn't AA that did.

tomsteve

glad to see ya back. i see it more as humility rather than shame, which noone says ya gotta get one or make the walk.
as fredsaid, there are some very sick people in AA as well as every other program of recovery.
i chose to seek out the fellowship i wanted and stay away from the sickos.

Sapling

I have a question for you Vick...Do you have a sponsor and have you worked the steps?

2granddaughters

Please seriously examine the logic of this statement. Are you honestly going to change a whole lifestyle because you can't stand the fleeting feeling of being embarrassed or perceived judgment by others?

I humbly request you go back to AA and pick up where you left off. AA will save your life.

All the best.

Bob R

Huey

It's a program of recovery, YOUR recovery, not shame or humiliation. Ignore the ridiculous confessional aspect and simply enjoy your sober life.

Jitterbugg

I get the feeling that half the people in the AA rooms should be picking up their 24hr chip too! An exaggeration of course, but just keep it your little secret.

CarolD

What you think of as a "walk of shame" is simply not my
expereince in AA. I was in and out of AA ...took me 4
years to earn a 1 year medallion.

We did not give chips ..instead we raised our hand to let others
know we were in our first 30 days. Yes I kept raising my hand
and often felt embarrassed.
So what? my drinking often made me embrassed too.

I kept going back to my home group for support and not once
was I made to feel unwanted or unwelcomed

When I began working the AA Steps...and connecting to God...
I moved forward and actually stopped drinking...

Welcome to our recovery community....

Stay here with us...many members are useing a variety of methods
concepts and recovery programs. AA is not the only way to
live sober if that is your goal.

instant

Those who judge have their own work to do. There are plenty of us.

freshstart57

Inventory taking is part of AA, and that fearless examination of conscience is an important part of the twelve steps.

Whether your sobriety is conditional on this or not is up to you. You have responsibility for your drinking, and you have responsibility for your sobriety too. Ultimately your relationship with alcohol is up to you, and how you choose to deal with it is your call. There is only one rule about staying sober that really counts, and that is whether you drink or not.

Your way forward all hinges on your answer to this one question, Vick23. Are you going to drink again or not? 'I'm not sure, nobody can really say, you never know what might happen tomorrow, I might be able to stay sober but only if I do XYZ', all that stuff comes from that voice inside you that really wants to drink again some day. You get to choose whether to listen to it or not.

You can choose to never drink again and never change your mind if you want to. We all can.

jennikate

Well, it's your choice whether to go get the 24 hour chip but....as the "audience member" as such I always feel happy for the person when they get that chip or any other chip for that matter. I know what an accomplishment that is. Remember, we have all been there.

DalyCityTrain

I picked up one of those chips a short while back and know exactly what you mean about the walk of shame. Some people will definitely shun you and avoid you after a relapse,its just the way it is. Others will definitely not, people are all different.

Just go get the chip and start over, it happens to the best of us.

bmwcycle

I wish you well and hope you find the peace you seek,

There are many schools of thought about the AA chip thing as you can see from all of the good comments above,

To me what works for you, works for you. If AA helps you but you don't like the counting days and chips, then do not partake or be polite and go through the motions.

It doesn't matter what other people say or how they count day etc..

If it works for you, then it works!!!

I had a glass of champagne at my friends daughters wedding a few months ago, one of attendees who is a "super AA" member told me that I had ruined all I worked for and must start again (what ever that means). I thanked him and wished him well. I am not going to let him decide what I have done or accomplished in any manner.

I stopped drinking to get my life in order, stop the roller coaster I was on that was disrupting my personal, family and professional life. I did not do it for chips, or recognition of my accomplishments by others.

From what I have found there are a few that take things a little too far and interpret the "Big Book" as gospel and take it way too literal. Also I think some need to get a life other than judging others.

But for the most part (95% of the people I have shared with) I have been impressed and over whelmed by the acceptance and support of "AA" members and non-AA members in my decisions. I have learned a great deal and been helped tremendously by the insight and input of others.

Anyway good luck and remember you can't put the sh@# back in the mule, all you do is get the mule mad and your hands dirty, you can try to prevent the mule from s#$ting on the floor again.