bran

This is my first time to seek help, so I am not sure exactly what to say - but I will give it a shot.

I am a 31/m studying abroad in Australia. I have been drinking on and off for several years, but it has just recently become a problem. For the past 6-8 months - I have been consuming about 8-12 standard drinks a night. In the beginning, there were some days where I would not drink - but very few.

Right now, I am so scared. I broke up with my long-time girlfriend two weeks ago. For the past 10 days, I have been drinking a bottle of vodka a night. That is approx. 21 standard drinks (by AUS standards).

I MUST stop, but I am so scared. It has gotten out of control. I do not want to go to the hospital and I am afraid if I go see a doctor, they will just put me in there. For all I know, they may revoke my student visa because of this. I know this is the best option - to avoid DT, but I just can not do that. I am a full time student and I am in the middle of the semester. And yes - I hardly go to class now, because I am too damn hung over to attend.

One bottle of vodka a night - that is scary. Could someone please help with me some advice - maybe someone who has consumed this much in the past. Would it be possible for me to taper off??

Any advice and help would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you so much.

hypochondriac

I would start cutting down now if you can Bran, but I really think talking to a doctor would be best. I'm sure they won't be able to do anything against your will, or revoke your visa.

Please don't attempt to do this alone. There is a lot of help out there. Have you thought about going to a local AA meeting? Maybe someone there can advise you, and face to face support is invaluable.

Glad you're here x

Tute

Hi bran. I used to drink that amount but in beer and whiskey, for nearly three years, night after night. I too almost lost my job because of that spiral, and it's an spiral that only you can stop.

I agree with hypo. At this stage it's only too easy to see things negatively, so it's time to break the spell that you cast on yourself, shake those fears and be stronger than them, because it sounds as if right now they have a good grip on you. Unfortunately this is the nature of alcohol, it robs you of your capacity to think clearly. The moment you start looking for solutions you'll start finding ways to deal with your drinking, but for this you need to do the following: sit down for a while and gather all your might, and then decide what and HOW you would like the outcome of this particular story of your life be. Because you are the only one that can change the course of events. In the meantime, try limiting the intake of alcohol by forcing yourself to do other kind of activities, so that you don't catch yourself alone and fall in that trap of self-pity that is compulsive drinking. Find some friends, go to the cinema, attend some meetings, don't stay alone. Also, apart from cutting down, drink lots of WATER, and you'll see how your hangovers are much less than they are now.

Man up, bran, it's time to be your own superhero. Save your life.

Scolova

Just wondering if your drinking has ramped-up to 'self-medicate' the issue? (break-up) ... fear, anxiety,.. or just boredom?
If you are on the verge of DTs you should see a doctor before you detox, I went through it alone, but in a nice environment, would not want to try it in a school setting. I was drinking daily through my 30s and was starting to have very bad daily withdraws\DT.

Dee74

welcome bran

Please don't worry unduly about your student visa.

I live in Australia. If they revoked your visa for drinking there would be very few foreign student visas left active.

The only reasons your visa might be cancelled is because you stop studying or you get in trouble with the law.

It will be much easier for you to stay studying and on the right side of the law if you get and stay sober - and it will be much easier for you to stay sober if you get some help.

Your campus health service might be a good place to start if hospital is too scary for you?

There may even be some recovery related groups active on your campus too

D

bran

Thank you guys so much for your responses and advice. I feel so alone, and it helps tremendously to know there are so many others that have been in my shoes. I do hope I can repay the favors in the [near] future.

@hypo: I have actually searched, and found several AA meeting places so nearby - and I will for sure attend. But, I feel I need to get sober first - and that is my biggest obstacle I am afraid of. I am afraid of going through hell, but then again - it can not be any worse than what I am going through now. I know AA is key - just because I often feel so alone here in Australia, so, when I am bored - I drink. That is how it all started. My first plan of action is to cut down my drinking. My mother is a recovering alcoholic - so that has made me always be aware of how much I drink. Sadly, it did not keep me from drinking. I will try my best to stay busy, and titrate my drinks down week by week. I know this will be most difficult, but - I have to give it a try. I know if [or when] I fail, I will have no choice but to see a doctor.

@Tute: Thank you so much. Your advice seems to go alone with what hypo said. I do know, the key is for me to GET OUT of my apartment (as I live alone) and stay busy. If I am busy and getting out, then I will be happier, distracted, and I will avoid the main situation which causes me to drink. Well, I don't know about "causes" - but, I do know, I drink alone and when I have nothing else to do. But then again, maybe the alcohol addiction makes me forget about studies and other things I should be doing, just so I can have that drink? I know my comments may seem stupid to you guys, but this is my first time having to deal with this and I am weak. When you said "man up" - that reminded me of my 4 years in the Army. It was a common phrase - and you hit the nail right on the head. I need to man up, and get this done. It will probably be the hardest thing I've had to do in my life so far.

@Scolova: Yes, my drinking has definitely ramped up due to the recent break up. Before, it was somewhat managable. But I guess it was only a matter of time before I had a serious issue in my life come up, that pushed me over the edge. But - as I said in the above - the reason why I drank previously was due to boredom pretty much. I think that is how it started to spiral out of control ... I have been in Aus for almost 16 months, and I have a lot of free time on my hands as I do not have any close friends yet.

@Dee: Thank you. I will look into finding a school program that may be of some help. But you guys on here, the advice you have given me - and letting me know I am not alone - has helped tremendously. I just hope I am not too late to save myself. These days and months that alcohol has seriously had a negative impact on my life - I can not get those days back. I hope if I fix it now, it is not too late.

laurie6781

(((((Bran)))))

Welcome to Sober Recovery. You have found a really GREAT place with lots of folks who have been where you are, or are where you are, who are more than willing to share their Experience, Strength and Hope (ES&H)

Oh, and you do not need to be sober to attend your first AA meeting. Many is the member that attended their first few meetings either drunk, or coming down off of their latest binge and reeking of alcohol. That is what we are all about in AA. If you have an honest 'desire' to stop drinking is all it takes to become a member.

I will also say thought, that it really would be advisable to check with your campus health center before attempting a detox and if they suggest it or not to see a doctor. Detoxing on one's own can be DEADLY, as some of us on here can attest to from first hand experience.

And most of all, please continue to post and let us know how you are doing, as we do care so very very much!!!!

BTW I may be in the States and a U.S. Citizen but Oz is my second home!!!!! I love it down under!!!! Especially Alice (Alice Springs) on the edge of the Outback.

Love and hugs,

tomsteve

brian, glad you are here. one of the traditions of AA is," the only requirement is a desire to stop drinking." being sober is more than not drinking. it involves mental and emotional change. AA has given me that. i know many people that started attending while still drinking and are now sober. i myself started attending 2 days after my last drunk. it has been a blessing. i couldnt do it on my own. i needed the help of people that had been where i was and, more importantly, wanted it.

bjames

Someone once told me "you don't have to be fixed to come to AA" and that is absolutely true.

I was drinking about that quantity up until about 5 weeks ago. I dried out in rehab, and since then, AA has helped tremendously. I highly recommend talking to a doctor. He/she may be able to prescribe some medications to help you detox on your own if you don't want to go to a hospital/detox. Without any professional help, you most likely will at least have anxiety, shakes, nightmares, trouble sleeping, and quite possibly DTs. Why put yourself through that if you can get some professional help?
Best of luck!!

Tute

And you'll be OK, I'm sure of that. In a few days all this will be just a memory, bran. Go to AA or wherever you can find some company, including this site, and soon you'll see that the easiest way to get out of that hole is by sharing it with others.

Just try not to feel down, and remember that we support you, from every corner of the world.

CarolD

Thank you for your military service time.

Welcome to our recovery community..


Please take time to read this informational link and it has some of
our expereinces too.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...at-we-did.html

The Salvation ARmy offers free short term de tox facilities in some countries
Why not check in your area?

All my best as you move into a sober future...