DryerthanDubai

Hi All,

I've just marked a milestone in my sobriety, one month without any drinking. I'm smoking still but cut down massively and plan to quit shortly.

I haven't missed drinking, and have been filling my time with software development and going to the gym. I've been to the gym before but never achieved results like I'm getting now. My situation is far from standard, I'm not working as I'm travelling, I've been staying in Manila with a friend and she has been extremely supportive. We even did a 7-day Master cleanse together.

I have quit drinking for a few reasons, one of which is that I wish to study Kung Fu in China and the school disallows drinking, smoking and Drugs. However I will be returning home for Christmas and I think i will wish to enjoy a few drinks with friends. Should I try drinking before then to see if I can drink responsibly? This would give me a good basis for the upcoming Christmas I think. Any advice is much appreciated.

A bit more info, I am not the sort of person that needs to drink every day but am the sort of person who will get far too drunk once I start to drink. Before i quit I would at least have two beers per day (as I'm travelling it's the done thing) back at home I wouldn't always drink as I had work the next day.

CarolD

If your goal is to be a non drinker...then please continue to be one.
Alcohol never notices holidays or jobs or school or traveling.

Hope you will stay sober...it really is a great way to live

DryerthanDubai

my goal was to be able to drink responsibly, at the moment I don't want to break my sobriety just to see if I can do so. Thanks for your response.

justhadenough

Congrats on 1 month

Personally,I'd tried thousands of times to be a normal drinker and failed each time -that's why I came on SR.

We all wish we were normal drinkers but if we were we wouldn't need to try and control it so much

Only you can answer your question

good luck

DryerthanDubai

Thanks justhadenough.

Unfortunately you've said what I've been thinking all along, it's possible that I can't drink without going to excess.

Did you find that you would be able to control your drinking a couple of times and then when you were least expecting it you'd end up on a binge. That's kinda what would happen to me when I was continuing to drink but trying to drink more sensibly?

justhadenough

Hi DTD

Yes,definitely.I would stop for week or 2,be so please/proud and say I obviously didn't have a problem.Then I'd have couple of glasses of wine for a few nights,then it turned in to a bottle then more.It was gradual but happened every single time.The effort involved in trying to control it(unsuccessfully) was immense

I totally understand where you are coming from./ I'm a month sober too(this time) but it is my final time.

Are you using any program? RationalRecovery/AVRT will teach you that what you are hearing is the beast-your addictive voice telling you you can handle it.It teaches you techniques to not give into your AV.

DryerthanDubai

I'm not with any program. I didn't really consider myself an alcoholic until I quit and got all the withdrawal symptoms that an alcoholic would experience. That really caught my attention.

When I was drinking, some nights would be fine and others would end up really badly, it might be, cause an argument or get tood fun all the way, remember everything that happened. No drama.

I wish I could identify what leads to the bad nights and omit it (I know it's alcohol in general) but why some alright and some soooo bad?

My plan is to carry on being sober indefinitely but I can't imagine seeing all my friends and family at Christmas (for the first time in 2 years) and not going out for a drink. Guess it's just a question of my willpower.

sugarbear1

I had no withdrawal symptoms. I am still an alcoholic. One is never enough, I drank to get drunk, plain and simple. Once I crossed that imaginary line into drinking to excess, I knew I could not go back. I tried for many years!

Being totally abstinent has been a wonderful thing for me.

Whatever you choose, be careful. Stopping drinking then drinking again always led me to drinking "worse" than before, as if my body was trying to "make up" for not drinking. It can be lethal for some.

I wish you well on your sober time and in your Kung Fu learning!!

DryerthanDubai

Thanks for the advice sugarbear.

In all honesty the thought of drinking repulses me a little at the minute. I used to love the idea of necking a cold beer but when I imagine it now it seems wrong to me. However when I imagine being with my mates back home in the pub then that seems right (as a situation).

I won't really know how I feel until I'm in the situation, I'll make sure I'm prepared to deal with the peer pressure that I know I'll experience, even from family I think.

When I was drinking, I definitely drank to get drunk, no doubt about it. I remember even saying it a few times. I would like to know what it is in me that loves to get drunk, high or generally act up now and then.

Thanks for all the replies everyone.

justhadenough

I agree with Sugarbear-it gets worse after a period of abstinence

I don't get caught up labelling what I am other than alcohol is a big problem for me. I just think of the effects of my drinking on behaviour/health etc. And once I start I really can't stop.

For me now,it is more problematic,physically and mentally, than enjoyable. I want to live a sober life more than I want to get drunk. It has taken me 20years to get here.

best of luckto you