DayTrader

What if you look at it from a completely different angle......

I did the same deal......mad as hell that it happened TO ME. Hopped right up on the pity-pot and sat there for quite a long while, early in recovery.

Fast forward to where I am now.......5+ yrs removed from my last drink. If I had the option to "drink like other people" - to be "normal" as you put it - but, as a price, I had to give up everything I've gained, learned, and incorporated into my life by being in recovery and learning to live a spiritual life............there's no way in hell I'd take that deal.

I KNOW it doesn't look like it now......but you've been given a gift. A "nudge" to make some changes that you won't want to make, more than likely. Those changes though, they've made all the difference in my life and in the lives of millions of others just like me.

What I used to think of as a curse.......is really a gateway to a frickin way-cool life and lifestyle that I never would have sought out had it not been for the motivation alcoholism gave me.

So yeah, happy......lucky......and blessed that I'm an alcoholic -- because recovery from alcoholISM (ie, alcoholism is much more than just an alcoholic drinking problem) has been one of (if not THE) best things I've ever done.

rinky

Here is just another way of looking at things... I'm an alcoholic... that's for sure... I can have just a few... or just one... or many many many... the thing is... Everyday.. I end up having it... that is where my delimma lies.... If I had something going on that I was interested in enough.... I wouldn't even want to drink.. I've been through the ringer a few times with it ..... I didn't know then that I was an alcoholic.... and when my life fell apart .. I went off the deep end with the drinking.. had never done anythhing like that in my life till then... My curse is.. I can do the drinking... like I said.. but all that does is keep me in a state of not being able to just leave it alone if Im bored or things aren't going right.. or for any other reason... sometimes I think it would be much easier to know that I absolutely cannot have that first drink or I'll take it to the limit... I don't know if that makes any sense or not.. but I have been struggling with this for almost 2 years now and I do think at times I would have already been long into some recovery... sober recovery if it weren't for the fact that I can nearly be normal... in doing what I'm doing..... I'm just using every day which can't be good for my health... and I have learned how not to do so much that my body goes through any kind of withdrawls... but heck..... sometimes I'll have a couple of drinks before church on sunday am just to chase away nerves that comes along with menapause so anyway.. there is just another angle to the same ole problem... I don't even know if it is a help or not.. just wanted to throw my 2 cent in on some advice from a friend recently about not staying in just one forum... thanks and good luck to you and your recovery..... and Mine... lol,,,

SSIL75

I'm sure I'm not the only recovering alcoholic who found 'normality' for the first time once they got sober!

spryte

Keep up the great work...hang in there