Silly Resentments
Peace, Love, Sobriety
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Join Date: Jan 2012
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Silly Resentments
NOTE: this is meant to be a fun/upbeat topic, if we can't laugh at ourselves in recovery, we aren't being honest! 
Something sparked this idea in my head, about some of the more "silly" resentments I have had to overcome during my step work. I thought it might be kind of fun for us to share some of these.
One of my earliest resentments was a little girl in my kindergarten class, and I remember that one day she brought her "hooked on phonics" game to class for sharing day and the class took turns playing with it. When I asked her if I could play she was snotty and said "no! its mine and i get to choose who can play and who cant and you cant because i said so!"
and here I am at 24 years old, a newly recovering alcoholic and during my 4th step this was the first thing that popped into my head. I am sitting here laughin my butt off right now because the first thought was "THAT LITTLE BITCH!" LOL!
I know its silly, and I have since let it go. But isn't it funny the things that we allow to bother us? even after 19 years have passed?
What are some silly things you have found yourselves resenting?
Something sparked this idea in my head, about some of the more "silly" resentments I have had to overcome during my step work. I thought it might be kind of fun for us to share some of these.
One of my earliest resentments was a little girl in my kindergarten class, and I remember that one day she brought her "hooked on phonics" game to class for sharing day and the class took turns playing with it. When I asked her if I could play she was snotty and said "no! its mine and i get to choose who can play and who cant and you cant because i said so!"
and here I am at 24 years old, a newly recovering alcoholic and during my 4th step this was the first thing that popped into my head. I am sitting here laughin my butt off right now because the first thought was "THAT LITTLE BITCH!" LOL!
I know its silly, and I have since let it go. But isn't it funny the things that we allow to bother us? even after 19 years have passed?
What are some silly things you have found yourselves resenting?
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Join Date: Nov 2009
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I am very picky about chairs - if the chair in a place is not comfortable, I am liable to build up a resentment against the group for putting it there. It's weird, b/c I am pretty easy-going in many ways, but chairs? CHAIRS?! Don't even get me started...
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Location: Poconos PA
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Maybe this is just my Alcoholism talking but I hate when people stand around bantering about how they drank. Or small talk to me, like how they want to have a beer when they leave or can't wait for a glass of wine. Then I have to play along to avoid looking stiff and act like I don't really know too much about it. I certainly don't want to come off as the old drunk I really am so I just yes and yeah them and say as little as possible without looking uninterested in their chatter. Peeves me though and I am glad when they leave.
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Originally Posted by spryte 
I am very picky about chairs - if the chair in a place is not comfortable, I am liable to build up a resentment against the group for putting it there. It's weird, b/c I am pretty easy-going in many ways, but chairs? CHAIRS?! Don't even get me started...
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
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The chair thing really made me laugh, I've got the same thing at work. My colleagues tease me about it now and deliberately move it or sit on it themselves!!
I also have my favourite parking space at work, and get rattled if someone else DARE park there! How petty, I'm ashamed!x
I also have my favourite parking space at work, and get rattled if someone else DARE park there! How petty, I'm ashamed!x
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Maryland
Posts: 120
i resent my lawn on the regular!!! the damn thing needs to be mowed, and badly. as i type this it's probably growing gnarly new weeds in an effort to make me look like the worst homeowner on the block!! unbelievable, the gall of nature!
hahaha- ridiculous, i know
hahaha- ridiculous, i know
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,348
What a fun thread, sometimes it helps to relieve the pressure of all the heavy recovery work we're doing! When I worked my 4th step a few little things came up that I was embarrassed to even write down! Out of nowhere I realized I had a resentment with my 6th grade gym teacher. She was just so flippin fit and happy and capable and strong, and she made me get out there and try...and totally fail. How dare she (try to help me)?? Now I see that I was just jealous.
It's so relieving to let these things go!
It's so relieving to let these things go!
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 1,191
Being a clevelander, I had a hard time with a resentment towards Lebron James when he went to Miami. I sat back and talked about how silly it was that all of Cleveland was so mad at him when on the inside I wanted to choke him. Like he did something to me personally or something.
He ended up on a written inventory and hasnt bothered me since. Ridiculous!
We can be quite childish cant we?
He ended up on a written inventory and hasnt bothered me since. Ridiculous!
We can be quite childish cant we?
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
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Where to start.....................
1. A Physical education teacher when I was 9 years old made me run round a tennis court twice in Novemeber cos I put my hands in my pockets cos they were so cold. The basket ball smarted every time I tried to catch it. The teacher has since died and I still cannot forgive her.
2. A girl I went to infant school with used to fib to the teacher that I had done something to her, like stabbed her hand with a pencil, so untrue. Still not friends with her on facebook 30 years later!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Could probably add another 100 resentments of the same petty nature.........
1. A Physical education teacher when I was 9 years old made me run round a tennis court twice in Novemeber cos I put my hands in my pockets cos they were so cold. The basket ball smarted every time I tried to catch it. The teacher has since died and I still cannot forgive her.
2. A girl I went to infant school with used to fib to the teacher that I had done something to her, like stabbed her hand with a pencil, so untrue. Still not friends with her on facebook 30 years later!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Could probably add another 100 resentments of the same petty nature.........
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Originally Posted by Jeni26
The chair thing really made me laugh, I've got the same thing at work. My colleagues tease me about it now and deliberately move it or sit on it themselves!!
I also have my favourite parking space at work, and get rattled if someone else DARE park there! How petty, I'm ashamed!x
I also have my favourite parking space at work, and get rattled if someone else DARE park there! How petty, I'm ashamed!x
Oh yes, parking!!!! God help someone if they take MY parking space. LMAO!
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When I was sober eight years I was doing hospitality at a meeting. Before one meeting I felt insulted by what someone said (we were both making coffee and setting up snacks). I stormed out of the meeting and, 14 years later, still haven't walked in the room.
Alcoholics are very thin skinned and hopefully we learn that not everything is about us.
Alcoholics are very thin skinned and hopefully we learn that not everything is about us.
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Originally Posted by NYCDoglvr
...
Alcoholics are very thin skinned and hopefully we learn that not everything is about us.
Alcoholics are very thin skinned and hopefully we learn that not everything is about us.
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Yeah, I have one against a third grade teacher! I just moved to America from England so I was only nine years old. I made a mistake on some math assignment I was doing in class so I raised my hand and asked for a "rubber". The teacher started laughing at me and so did the class and he told me never to ask for a rubber again it is an ERASER! He is on my resentment list the f%@&er :rotfxko
Oh, I must have been six years old and I was waiting in line for the bus to drive me home from school clutching my My Little Ponies which I just adored and some little brat walks over to me and starts singing "my little pony so skinny and bony made of elastic all covered in plastic!" I lost it and started bawling my little eyes out lol. Funny how certain things stick with us.
Oh, I must have been six years old and I was waiting in line for the bus to drive me home from school clutching my My Little Ponies which I just adored and some little brat walks over to me and starts singing "my little pony so skinny and bony made of elastic all covered in plastic!" I lost it and started bawling my little eyes out lol. Funny how certain things stick with us.
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Originally Posted by Innerchild
Yeah, I have one against a third grade teacher! I just moved to America from England so I was only nine years old. I made a mistake on some math assignment I was doing in class so I raised my hand and asked for a "rubber". The teacher started laughing at me and so did the class and he told me never to ask for a rubber again it is an ERASER! He is on my resentment list the f%@&er :rotfxko
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Originally Posted by Innerchild
Yeah, I have one against a third grade teacher! I just moved to America from England so I was only nine years old. I made a mistake on some math assignment I was doing in class so I raised my hand and asked for a "rubber". The teacher started laughing at me and so did the class and he told me never to ask for a rubber again it is an ERASER! He is on my resentment list the f%@&er :rotfxko
Oh, I must have been six years old and I was waiting in line for the bus to drive me home from school clutching my My Little Ponies which I just adored and some little brat walks over to me and starts singing "my little pony so skinny and bony made of elastic all covered in plastic!" I lost it and started bawling my little eyes out lol. Funny how certain things stick with us.
Oh, I must have been six years old and I was waiting in line for the bus to drive me home from school clutching my My Little Ponies which I just adored and some little brat walks over to me and starts singing "my little pony so skinny and bony made of elastic all covered in plastic!" I lost it and started bawling my little eyes out lol. Funny how certain things stick with us.
And, I can soooo relate to the My Little Pony thing!!! They were my absolute favorite toys, My favorite was named "FireFly". Anyway, I have 4 brothers so I heard that song many times and also shed many tears over it. I feel ya pain!lol
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When I was a little girl Barney was popular and everyone used to make fun of me for watching it, and they would also sing horrible songs about it. I'm sure you've heard them. lol
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There is another way to look at these resentments that we carry. These resentments are always a result of some belief we hold that is simply not true.
It goes like this: something happens, we process it through some idea that we have, and then we react. Sometimes the idea or belief is unreasonable or irrational, for example, the belief that people must always treat us fairly and be considerate of us, and if they don't, they are rotten and bad and need to be punished. This leads us to feelings of resentment.
We don't need to think that these beliefs mean that we have defective characters to move beyond these resentments. Acceptance and mindfulness are effective ways to alter these beliefs and our reactions.
It goes like this: something happens, we process it through some idea that we have, and then we react. Sometimes the idea or belief is unreasonable or irrational, for example, the belief that people must always treat us fairly and be considerate of us, and if they don't, they are rotten and bad and need to be punished. This leads us to feelings of resentment.
We don't need to think that these beliefs mean that we have defective characters to move beyond these resentments. Acceptance and mindfulness are effective ways to alter these beliefs and our reactions.
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Originally Posted by freshstart57
There is another way to look at these resentments that we carry. These resentments are always a result of some belief we hold that is simply not true.
It goes like this: something happens, we process it through some idea that we have, and then we react. Sometimes the idea or belief is unreasonable or irrational, for example, the belief that people must always treat us fairly and be considerate of us, and if they don't, they are rotten and bad and need to be punished. This leads us to feelings of resentment.
We don't need to think that these beliefs mean that we have defective characters to move beyond these resentments. Acceptance and mindfulness are effective ways to alter these beliefs and our reactions.
It goes like this: something happens, we process it through some idea that we have, and then we react. Sometimes the idea or belief is unreasonable or irrational, for example, the belief that people must always treat us fairly and be considerate of us, and if they don't, they are rotten and bad and need to be punished. This leads us to feelings of resentment.
We don't need to think that these beliefs mean that we have defective characters to move beyond these resentments. Acceptance and mindfulness are effective ways to alter these beliefs and our reactions.
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