My story, pleasre give input, very sad.
I looked like that holdin beer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 627
Hi, I think it is cool though that you have family that is helping you out. I don't have family, so I know if I don't keep and get my Sh*t together, I would be screwed for sure. You can count that as a blessing.
You mentioned that, "i just have these days that i feel so profundley sad and i wounder if all i have done is worth what i have lost."
Dude, if you kept on drinking you probably would have lost everything anyhow, and still been drinking. Also, I think almost everyone has been through the extreme heartbreak of a relationship ending, but eventually it does get better
I was going to mention too, that you might want to see a doc for depression. It might help.
Take care
You mentioned that, "i just have these days that i feel so profundley sad and i wounder if all i have done is worth what i have lost."
Dude, if you kept on drinking you probably would have lost everything anyhow, and still been drinking. Also, I think almost everyone has been through the extreme heartbreak of a relationship ending, but eventually it does get better
I was going to mention too, that you might want to see a doc for depression. It might help.
Take care
Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 145
DeathKnight, I can relate to your story quite a bit. Boozed too hard, did the drugs, liver began to fail, spent a week in the hospital, and was abandoned by a few people during one of the darkest times of my life. I was very lonely after I got out of the hospital, and faced sobriety by myself at first. I relied on only myself, and felt like this was my only chance. If I had stuck with a program or professional help, instead of doing it completely on my own, perhaps I wouldn't have relapsed and thus experienced further liver trouble recently.
I don't suggest going through this on your own. It sucks, a LOT, to be abandoned during a time like this. I totally feel for you, and can relate. You're at a new point in your life. Starting over. The past is gone, along with the liquor, along with the abandonment you experienced. I'd suggest joining a program, and perhaps seeing a therapist about your loneliness and sadness. Get up on you feet and face this. Find your inner strength, your self-respect, and find the help that you truly deserve. You do not have to suffer like this.
I don't suggest going through this on your own. It sucks, a LOT, to be abandoned during a time like this. I totally feel for you, and can relate. You're at a new point in your life. Starting over. The past is gone, along with the liquor, along with the abandonment you experienced. I'd suggest joining a program, and perhaps seeing a therapist about your loneliness and sadness. Get up on you feet and face this. Find your inner strength, your self-respect, and find the help that you truly deserve. You do not have to suffer like this.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Originally Posted by DeathKnight 
besides that i have nothing going for me, other than im clean.
Sometimes I feel sorry for my self and a bit down, but if I think back to how I felt when I was drinking and thought I'd never be able to quit...and to see so many other people out there still struggling! It must be awful to still be in that place. Hold on to the fact that you are clean and sober and the rest will follow. Your recovery is the most important thing right now. Is there any group support you could go to near you, just to have some face to face support? Hope you feel okay x
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Cambridge, England
Posts: 31
DK - i think you sound very depressed and unless this is managed I don't think you will be able to move on. The bad/regretful aspects of our past are set in stone but how we view and deal with them is critical and dependant on how well our minds are functioning. If you are depressed you will never be able to get past beating yourself up over this stuff. Your mind will continue to hammer you regarding what could have been etc etc- it's obviously not healthy and just makes the whole thing worse- it's a very sinister downward spiral. I am not sure if you have had professional help for depression but it sounds to me that this will be very important for your recovery. Good luck DK. David
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: middletown ohio
Posts: 38
I have to agree with Bobcat, I had a 38 year addiction to opiates
and beer on 1/12/08 I gave it to my Higher Power and go one day
at a time. Beleave me after 41/2 years at times I feel like saying
forget it. But I look at my life now then I think about my life back
then. I chose living one day at a time sober.
and beer on 1/12/08 I gave it to my Higher Power and go one day
at a time. Beleave me after 41/2 years at times I feel like saying
forget it. But I look at my life now then I think about my life back
then. I chose living one day at a time sober.
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