Self will????
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
Luke 12:24 Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!
Ponder it. Your still here your still alive and well. Theres a reason and a season for everything. You have to let it go sometimes.
I find myself in impossible situations. There isnt anything i can do but let go. Living by faith. Regardless of who your higher power is its a pretty awesome thing to know that your not alone He's looken out for you he's got your back he's got you coverd your life has value and is always going to be very important to at least Him.
pretty friggen cool if you ask me.
Ponder it. Your still here your still alive and well. Theres a reason and a season for everything. You have to let it go sometimes.
I find myself in impossible situations. There isnt anything i can do but let go. Living by faith. Regardless of who your higher power is its a pretty awesome thing to know that your not alone He's looken out for you he's got your back he's got you coverd your life has value and is always going to be very important to at least Him.
pretty friggen cool if you ask me.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Great questions!
We can't give what we don't have, and so being responsible for 'owning' our self-will is paramount and essential to honestly living with the realities and rewards offered with practising the change over from self-will to free-will.
My self-will runs riot when I live as a drinking alcoholic. No matter my game-plan, my self-will always ruined my life, driven by the destructiveness of my alcoholism. This short description of my alcoholic self-will is what was handed over to my HP. In exchange, I received a sober free-will, and with this new responsibility, and new psyche, and new practices, I achieved sober living.
To some of course, self-will, and free-will, are one and the same, To me, the differences are as obvious as the qualities between abstinence and sobriety.
So my suggestion is to differentiate your problems with self-will and drinking, and your solutions with not-drinking and free-will. Discriminating between the two opposites opened my mind to a different world of understanding, and with such a new understanding, the ways forward became crystal clear.
We can't give what we don't have, and so being responsible for 'owning' our self-will is paramount and essential to honestly living with the realities and rewards offered with practising the change over from self-will to free-will.
My self-will runs riot when I live as a drinking alcoholic. No matter my game-plan, my self-will always ruined my life, driven by the destructiveness of my alcoholism. This short description of my alcoholic self-will is what was handed over to my HP. In exchange, I received a sober free-will, and with this new responsibility, and new psyche, and new practices, I achieved sober living.
To some of course, self-will, and free-will, are one and the same, To me, the differences are as obvious as the qualities between abstinence and sobriety.
So my suggestion is to differentiate your problems with self-will and drinking, and your solutions with not-drinking and free-will. Discriminating between the two opposites opened my mind to a different world of understanding, and with such a new understanding, the ways forward became crystal clear.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by Innerchild 
I would just like to talk to an alcoholic without the mention of God. Nothing against Him but thats all I hear.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Don't sweat accusations. Opinions are everywhere, and so it is rare to discover an opinion that is a deal-breaker, you know?
If you're not drinking, that is awesome. If you're having trouble letting go, that is honestly a normal condition, don't sweat the experience. Go with it, and follow your heart, your intuition, do the program, let go of your alcoholic mind, and grasp dearly onto your changing psyche, and you'll be good to go.
If you're not drinking, that is awesome. If you're having trouble letting go, that is honestly a normal condition, don't sweat the experience. Go with it, and follow your heart, your intuition, do the program, let go of your alcoholic mind, and grasp dearly onto your changing psyche, and you'll be good to go.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
God gave us free will but our corruptable flesh is what drives us to do some of the nonsense we do.
The solutions are simple to many issues in life but we as humans have such a hard time getting it sometimes.
I'm not sure what you mean by not giving your will to God. I might say hope I'm doing Gods will. And or doing the right things.
The solutions are simple to many issues in life but we as humans have such a hard time getting it sometimes.
I'm not sure what you mean by not giving your will to God. I might say hope I'm doing Gods will. And or doing the right things.
Grateful AA member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the middle of the woods, NJ
Posts: 567
I posted more in the New o Recovery section. I would like to talk to someone in early sobriety about how it sucks without the mention of God bc right now I dont get it. I just want a friend to talk to not just someone who is rehashing the BB. Thats what you get when you talk to people in AA, just rehashing the BB they dont care about how u truely feel. They ask you to talk then tell you pour pour me another drink and read the BB.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 184
I have a hard time with the "God thing" too - the closest I can come to conceptualizing a "higher power" or "life force" or whatever you want to call it, is when I think of a seed. I can hold a seed all day and it will never grow. I can plant it, and water it, but I can't make it grow. I don't know what does, I just have to trust it has something to do with something I don't understand. Maybe I won't ever understand, but I don't need to understand it to trust that the seed will, somehow, grow.
It's a free-will thing: choosing to trust.
It's a free-will thing: choosing to trust.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
"I posted more in the New o Recovery section. I would like to talk to someone in early sobriety about how it sucks without the mention of God bc right now I dont get it. I just want a friend to talk to not just someone who is rehashing the BB. Thats what you get when you talk to people in AA, just rehashing the BB they dont care about how u truely feel. They ask you to talk then tell you pour pour me another drink and read the BB."
Thats exactly my problem with AA. I dont exactly want to talk about drinking or the big book my problem is the issues that got me there those are the issues i'd like to just talk to someone about and work through. those are the issues i went to AA for thinking i'd get help with. But the focus of AA is all about staying sober it seems. This is why I havent picked a sponsor that and I dont know anyone all that well.
Maybe i should just pay a therapist. I've talked my friends ears off rehashing the same problems and getting no answers.
I think I see what your saying.
Thats exactly my problem with AA. I dont exactly want to talk about drinking or the big book my problem is the issues that got me there those are the issues i'd like to just talk to someone about and work through. those are the issues i went to AA for thinking i'd get help with. But the focus of AA is all about staying sober it seems. This is why I havent picked a sponsor that and I dont know anyone all that well.
Maybe i should just pay a therapist. I've talked my friends ears off rehashing the same problems and getting no answers.
I think I see what your saying.
Grateful AA member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the middle of the woods, NJ
Posts: 567
I get you ZJW, I understand that members in AA are going to be honest tell you how it is but I dont always want to talk about alcoholism. YOu do this or that bc you are an alcoholic. I am human too with emotions!
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
All I can tell you is how I think about this. IMO we were all given a “will”, that is, the power of choice, for a reason. We cannot give it away, or give it back. However, exactly because of this, we are free to ALIGN our will with that of a higher power. In other words, to do what we think is the right, ethical, and/or moral thing to do. This is often in conflict with what seems to be the thing that will make us “feel good”. Doing this right/moral/ethical thing is not giving up self-will, but rather the choice to live an existence on a deeper and more meaningful level. It’s a level more free from the boundaries of self . The experience of this can only be obtained when those right/moral/ethical decisions are made, and experienced most fully when those right/moral/ethical decisions are made when they seem to be at the expense of ourselves.
I'm not sure if this addresses any of your concerns but it's where I go when I hear something like what you have posted.
I'm not sure if this addresses any of your concerns but it's where I go when I hear something like what you have posted.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Originally Posted by Innerchild
I would like to talk to someone in early sobriety about how it sucks without the mention of God bc right now I dont get it. I just want a friend to talk to not just someone who is rehashing the BB. Thats what you get when you talk to people in AA, just rehashing the BB they dont care about how u truely feel. They ask you to talk then tell you pour pour me another drink and read the BB.
Grateful AA member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the middle of the woods, NJ
Posts: 567
Thanks I am having a really hard time letting goand frustrated that I cant talk to anyone who is not a therapist or someone in AA who tells me I am a baby and pour me another drink.
Member of SMART Recovery
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 1,722
Innerchild,
I understand the struggle you're having; I had it, too, and spent a lot of years tying myself up into knots trying to figure this stuff out. I never did. I felt much better when I stopped trying. I've now been sober for almost 14 years without turning my will over to God.
There's nothing wrong with AA if it works for you, but if you aren't comfortable there it's okay! You can give another recovery approach a try, or join the large number of people who just use SR support.
I understand the struggle you're having; I had it, too, and spent a lot of years tying myself up into knots trying to figure this stuff out. I never did. I felt much better when I stopped trying. I've now been sober for almost 14 years without turning my will over to God.
There's nothing wrong with AA if it works for you, but if you aren't comfortable there it's okay! You can give another recovery approach a try, or join the large number of people who just use SR support.
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