checkmate1

I've been on these forums a long time and I have only managed 6 months sobriety. My Dad asked me the other day do you realize the things you say when your drunk and the best I could come up with was that when people have a go at me when I'm drinking It's like they turn on a switch and I get angry and say the worst things under the sun.

What's worse is that my Mum carry's a baseball bat under the bed because they don't know what I'm capable of when under the influence....this in itself is bad and my Dad told me this.

I'm going to end up dead from the alcohol because I've abused my body so much or incarcerated or just plain mental it's scary stuff. I watch that hardest prisons show on TV and think to myself do you really want to be locked up for doing something terrible over having a drink?

My old man says just don't get rotten pissed but as everyone knows on this forum we alcoholics have little control over how much we drink after we decide to have just one.

Dee74

I'm sorry you're still struggling checkmate.
Do you have any thoughts or ideas on how you can stay sober now?

D

DarrenW

Your last sentence said it all....one beer has the power to put me in a box, hospital, or prison. Hang in there...

checkmate1

I feel like having a drink now to be honest....When I look back on when I had 6 months sobriety last time I think I was on the right track there but it's going to be a hard slog. I think just committing to not drink will be tough but with the facts about my drinking all around me it makes sense to quit especially when your mum has a baseball bat that's the thing that gets me the most.

DarrenW

Yes, I would tell you how hard it is but you already know. We all know. I so wish I could drink like a normal person..maybe even have one-two drunks a month. I got to a point where I could down 31 beers at a time (last November). I almost died so I decided to quit.

checkmate1

Yes I would be around that 31 beer mark too on a bad day. I have a huge gut and look unhealthy.

CarolD

You are fortunate you still have a place to live.
I would not be living with anyone in active addiction...bat or no bat.

Yes...I did ban my still drinking young adult children from my home.
Yes they did go homeless...jobless..to .hospitls and jails....finally
they both did quit...one is in AA and the other NA.

You do know how to quit...I hope you will stay sober this time..