Huey

If you go to many AA meetings every week, get a 'sponsor', admit that you are powerless over everything in your life, do exactly what your 'sponsor' tells you to do, read the Big Book, accept pseudo Catholocism as your religion of choice, and confuse humility with continual self deprecation, you'll probably stay sober for a while.
The Very Best Of Luck

RobbyRobot

Sorry for your troubles, hope things get turned around quickly. Alcohol worked for me on many levels until it didn't, and nothing helped me like alcohol did for me to be me, so when alcohol failed me, I failed me too, it seemed.

It seems so obvious now, but to quit drinking, I needed to understand that whatever alcohol did for me was already inside me, and without alcohol, I still had the magic inside me. Alcohol made it easier to get to that magic, and yet, it also made it easier to not being able to hold on to myself enough to enjoy me being me. No matter how high alcohol floated me, into hell I would descend sooner than later, and no amount of alcohol saved me after that.

The writing was on the wall for me. Alcohol was no longer my friend. No substitute will ever be either. For better or worse, I am an alcoholic, and so alcohol is a poison for me.

There are choices for you to make to get alcohol out of your life. Many ways forward will accomplish that goal. Good to see you're willingly to share of yourself to become a different you who dosen't use alcohol anymore as a way of making your life easier.

NYCDoglvr

It helps to understand that compulsion to drink is part of alcoholism. But what I learned in early sobriety: you don't have to drink. You're not being struck drunk. You pick up a drink because you choose to. Now there are other options: get to an AA meeting and share about how you feel. Get a sponsor who you can call. Follow the steps. I owe my life to AA and you have to take suggestions. Stay away from alcohol and anyone who reminds you of drinking. It's willingness that makes the difference, willingness to do whatever it takes to stay sober. The compulsion and craving do leave, you get better. It's a disease and a progressive disease.

bloss

I tried many approaches to deal with my anxiety disorder, ultimately one on one therapy and meditation made it possible to tolerate being in crowded areas. I had to run out of my office one day, felt like the people and walls were closing in on me. I used alcohol to lessen my anxiety, which didn't work very well after I became addicted to alcohol, the 12 steps/Smart etc. are helpful for alcoholism, I needed extra help from my Dr. And a psychologist.

onlythetruth

Blue Eyes,

I know exactly what you mean about alcohol working to stop the panic attacks. I too had panic attacks when I was drinking and sure enough, drinking did stop them. Too bad it was destroying my life in the process.

When I quit drinking, the panic attacks did get better, less frequent, but they did not go away entirely, and no amount of "working" any program got rid of them. For me, they are chemically based and require medication, in my case, a low dose of Lexapro.

This is not medical advice, just my own experience, based on which I think you should work with a competent, licensed mental health professional.

soberbrooke

I couldn't just quit, because I am an Alcoholic. Other people don't think like I do, I am an Alcoholic.

MetalChick

Blue- I do not know-- I guess each person is very different. I think for me it is that I have had a lot of bad things happen when I was drunk, and I am scared to be like that again. And my mind is telling me that if I drink I will overdue it, and I will do something stupid. Plus I watched my dad die over alcohol complications. I am not saying I have it down- I am only 4 weeks sober, but I am feeling so good. Like I said-- I remember some really bad things that I know would not have happened if I was sober- I can not go through it again. But it is your journey, and maybe you are not at a place where it hurts to drink more then it does to be sober.

MetalChick

BTW-- booze only makes panic attacks worse

freshstart57

BehindBlueEyes, you can find many people that will tell you what you can and cannot do, and you can choose to listen to them or not.

People have been getting addicted to alcohol, getting sober and renouncing their alcoholism for literally THOUSANDS OF YEARS. Make no mistake about this. You most definitely can 'just stop drinking', just as they did. I used to be physically and psychologically dependent on alcohol, an alcoholic in every way, and I 'just quit'.

Just as you get to choose who to listen to, you also get to choose whether to continue to drink. If AA is not your style, there are other ways of thinking about getting sober and staying abstinent. Look into AVRT, SMART, Lifeline, mindfulness to name a few.

What is required to succeed is the understanding that you can no longer drink. That phase of life is over, and it is time to move on. Are you ready to make a plan about your future use of alcohol?