FaithfulQuest

Ok, here I go...I have not had much of a libido in forever. I make it happen for my husband's sake, but if it were up to me, I'd be fine without it. The time frame between "sessions" is increasing to a level I'm not comfortable with so I *know* he's not! Is this due to the years of increased drinking? Is this something that as my body regulates it self again, will return???

My counselor has said (I haven't addressed the alcohol problem in depth with her as my decision to finally quit has come one since I've seen her 3 weeks ago) it's a result of not being able to relax and settle...that once I learn to relax, that urge (or whatever you call it LOL) will return. She might be onto something but just didn't know the cause of the anxiety.

I know being intimate is important to my husband and it should be to me!!! But it's just not

I'm 9 days going strong btw!!!

Dee74

Hi FaithfulQuest

I'm no expert - I was not in a relationship when I quit drinking...but I think you need to give yourself, your body and you mind time to readjust to sobriety....

9 days is great - but it is just ...9 days.

Give yourself a little more time

D

sugarbear1

It will return!

OklaBH

Welcome---have you talked to him about your drinking? Does he know you are going to a councelor? If you are uncomfortable start with that. Its not about him...its about changes youve recently made.

Glad youre here.

DoinThis

I'm the same! I think cos this recovery process kinda consumes us in the beginning I struggle to think about much else when I have free time. I'm usually on SR, haha. I'm sure it'll come back when we start feeling ourselves again

yeahgr8

It will more likely be one of the underlying issues that you have been using alcohol for as a form of self medication...i have tackled multiple issues in sobriety and would not have been able to do so whilst "getting myself right" with alcohol...intimacy was a big one for me too, it's not libido:-)

KDL

Faithfulquest-

I couldn't have written your original post myself. I don't understand it, and my husband is starting to take it personally.

I'm know I've often used alcohol to relax and maybe reduce inhibitions. Without alcohol, I'm not the same. I'm at 45 days. I'm wondering if this is just the real me, or maybe things will change in time. ???

FredG

Congrats on 9 days

I'd like to say that everything will get better in that area, but truth is - I have absolutely NO idea.

I do know this - If I drink I die (this I know for sure), and I think that would put a BIG damper on my SD. Don't know that for sure either though

FaithfulQuest

So true LOL!!! You're on to something there.

Elisabeth888

Not medical advice, but I think sec drive is hormonally driven and alcohol messes with hormones just likeit does practically every other system in the body.

2granddaughters

Are you going to AA meetings? The girls there will be able to help you.

All the best.

Bob R

onlythetruth

I had the same problem, but it didn't last that long.

Based on conversations with other women, I'd say this is pretty common. And at 9 days, nothing to be too worried about. Give yourself time...really.