2 months
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Bellingham
Posts: 513
2 months
I quit for 4 months, 'relapsed' and have managed another 2 months with AA. It's a lot different with AA. I really like AA.
It's like peeling the layers of an onion or artichoke. Self discovery is only painful and scary when you are not doing it. We experience pain and don't know how to deal with it. In the face of apparent woeful inadequacy, we construct a blustry outer scaffold to compete in a world where we don't listen for fear of hearing, don't see for fear of seeing. And then alcohol comes in and tells us that the way we are living is problematic.
I could have gone on for years. But I'm glad that that last tequila drunk shook something inside of me and told me to look elsewhere for a rich experience. And isn't that what we're all looking for in alcohol? The rich experience we chronically deny ourselves? Thoughts of early sobriety. Key word early.
It's like peeling the layers of an onion or artichoke. Self discovery is only painful and scary when you are not doing it. We experience pain and don't know how to deal with it. In the face of apparent woeful inadequacy, we construct a blustry outer scaffold to compete in a world where we don't listen for fear of hearing, don't see for fear of seeing. And then alcohol comes in and tells us that the way we are living is problematic.
I could have gone on for years. But I'm glad that that last tequila drunk shook something inside of me and told me to look elsewhere for a rich experience. And isn't that what we're all looking for in alcohol? The rich experience we chronically deny ourselves? Thoughts of early sobriety. Key word early.
You are on the right path!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: NJ
Posts: 594
I love that you love AA!!! And you have learned an important point already. The program is constant work on self. We have to see our part in every good and bad situation. You will make friend that genually care for your well being. One of my favorite parts is you have to give it away to keep it. The feelings you get when helping another alcoholic is so satisfying!! Good to see you my friend :ghug3
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Cambridge, England
Posts: 31
Our brains are the most complex construct known to exist in the Universe - it is here that the battle waged against alcoholism occurs - in your mind - my mind -thousands of minds - the dysfunctional drinking mind versus a deeper more rooted mind that knows the temporary relief-peace etc of drinking is a facade and that true peace will only be found when the alcohol is permanently banished from our lives. Recruiting other minds (friends/SR and of course AA) can only help swing this complex internal battle in our favour ... alone i think it would be near impossible - it's great you are so mentally positive - Good luck DD
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