AllyCat

I have a problem with binge drinking. A couple of weeks ago I started celebrating on a Saturday afternoon and didn't stop until Monday night. I'm not really sure if that is classified as binge drinking, more like a bender. I do drink on too many occasions, yet I do not drink everyday and recently stopped drinking during the week. My biggest problem is drinking shots. I will start with three to get a fast buzz, but then my brain takes over and I am drinking three shots an hour until I pass out (not all the time, though). If I drink beer, I never really get drunk. If I drink wine, I will get intoxicated but it will be at a socially acceptable level. I do not believe I am an alcoholic. I have read different material and have decided to give moderation a try. There is a program, well I'm not sure if it should be called a program, but a book written by Rahul Nag that describes how to go about drinking in moderation. I am going to give that a try before I decide if I need to abstain from alcohol completely.

It did scare me that when I stopped drinking 10 days ago (the program starts with a 30 day abstinance from alcohol) right after my bender, that I experienced more severe withdrawal symptoms than I was expecting. I had full blown night sweats, insomnia, anxiety, gastric issues, and depression. I also notice some physical signs of alcohol abuse that I didn't realize were caused by drinking until I was reading some literature. I have no doubt this will work for the short term (1 year), but I am hoping I can keep up using his techniques to become a casual drinker for life.

Before I started this program, I was an all or nothing drinker. I either didn't drink at all or I got drunk. This is what scares me about moderation, that I haven't moderated myself much before. Oh, I know how to when I must, such as in social situations. It is only a problem when I am at home.

One other obstacle will be my wife. She knows I drink too much now and then and has worried on the few occasions that I have "lost myself" for a couple of days, but other than that she doesn't see an issue at all with my drinking. She likes to have a few drinks now and then and occasionally has some beyond her limits, and enjoys this type of drinking. So, in a way I feel a bit pressured to be able to socially drink with her. In saying that, I am not trying moderation instead of abstinance because of her. My fear is that occasionally she does want to drink to excess and that is where I will need to let her know that I am fine with my three beers. I would be just fine with never waking up with a hangover again.

I know I may get some backlash at this post, as I think most of you will think I am being foolish, but I don't.....time will tell.

-AC

Boleo

I can see where your ability to "sometimes" abstain from drinking is giving you the impression that you still have control of your drinking habits. However, alcoholism is ALWAYS a progressive disease and do matter how small your problem seems now, it will only get worse in the future. It is the proverbial "slippery slope" that one can never back away from.

sugarbear1

I know of many binge drinkers who have alcoholism.

I wish you well,

doggonecarl

Rahul Nag must have found moderation difficult because he quit drinking all together. And he claims not to be an alcoholic.

Good luck. If you succeed it means you aren't an alcoholic. If your experiment fails, we'll be here, ready to support your sobriety.

tomsteve

best of luck to you. please let us know how that works for ya.

Newatthis34

Are you being honest with yourself? I wonder why you've posted if you don't think there is a problem with your pattern of drinking. Either way, best of luck to you and keep us posted on how things go.

AllyCat

True enough, I guess that's the question I will be trying to answer.

AllyCat

I do think there is a problem with my current pattern of drinking, that is why I am trying to change it, just not to the point of abstaining.

suki44883

A non-alcoholic doesn't have to try to moderate their drinking. They do so naturally. After one or two, they are done and don't care for more. I have found that total abstinance is much easier than trying to moderate, counting drinks, deciding which days I can drink and which days I shouldn't. Too much trouble.

LotusBlossom

For me, it was always about what was my intention when I drank? Not when I started but when that automatic...voice/impulse/whatever you want to call it took over. Was it to get obliterated?

For me, it was nearly always to get completely wasted and obliterated, never to just drink one or a half of one or a quarter of a drink (how absurd is THAT?!).

That's when I knew I myself had crossed a line and it was no longer a matter of "retraining". I just had to refrain and abstain...for good.

I wish you the best of luck and I hope whatever your path is it works out fabulously for you!

AllyCat

I agree, my hope is that I will find out if I am just drinking out of habit and boredom. My fear is just as your quote, it may just be easier not to drink at all. This will definitely be a test as to where my brain stands on the subject. I am trying to be honest with myself. If I find that I cannot stop at my limit without being comfortable, or that it is easier to just not drink at all, then I will go that route. As you have all stated, yes, I do have concerns about being an alcoholic. I'm not trying to deceive myself. I'm just on the edge of the fence. The last 10 days it's been easy not to drink. I know that doesn't mean I'm not alcoholic but it also doesn't mean I am. I need to figure it out as situations arrive and reflect on how I deal/feel about them.

-AC

suki44883

My fear is just as your quote, it may just be easier not to drink at all.

Why is that fearful to you? What is really so great about drinking alcohol?

AllyCat

I say that because then I would definitely have to admit to being an alcoholic. That is a hard realization.

suki44883

A lot of people just don't drink; not because they are necessarily alcoholic, but because they don't like the way alcohol affects them, or they don't like the health problems drinking alcohol can bring. There are many reasons NOT to drink alcohol other than being an alcoholic.

Even if you discover that you are alcoholic, that is far, FAR from the worst thing in the world. Most of us have gone on to have perfectly wonderful lives without alcohol. Again I ask, what is so great about drinking alcohol anyway?

BASEjumper

I did an experiment similar to yours early on when I felt I had a serious drinking problem. I quit for 30 days on the advice of a therapist. I felt like I had to prove I could control it.

But the mental obsession and cravings continued, and eventually I was back at it. For me it always got worse, never better.

Just because I passed the test didn't mean I was okay. As I found out later. I hope it works out for you.

BillyPilgrim

I think the point is, you have come here because you have an issue with drinking. None of us like admitting to the A word, however, if you can moderate without any problem , then you dont need to be on this site

Stop drinking for say, 90 days, then go back to it. If you can drink one or two from time to time and stop, then you dont have a problem

I personally see no problem with admitting to being an alcoholic, my definition of the word is someone who is not comfortable with their relationship with alcohol.

I am not on the street, I drank comfortably on my sofa, sometimes out of crystal glass.

Still made me an alcoholic

Tried to moderate, couldn't , stopped , felt better

tons better

AllyCat

Guess I should have done this first without posting then. Sorry if you feel I have wasted your time. I didn't realize this forum was only for those that had already admitted they were alcoholics. I guess I'll come back if I end up in dire straights.

suki44883

Oh good grief. You are welcome to post here anytime, AllyCat. To be fair, you took what was said totally out of context, but you are free to leave if you want, also. Good luck to you.

sugarbear1

We've tried to moderate, it didn't work.

Stick around, there is a lot to read!

Glad you are here!

BillyPilgrim

Ally the last thing I want is for you to suffer what I did. We have all tried moderation because we could not stop drinking. Stick around if you don't need us great, but if you do we are here.
Nobody judges here
Bp