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Old 05-11-2012, 08:24 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Welcome to SR!

Cocaine changes how our dopamine is in our brains. It can give us permanent brain damage and we may or may not feel totally happy again....it will take about 7 years to heal from that abuse. I've been there, too.

Lots of programs are available for recovery; AVRT, Rational Recovery, SMART, AA, addiction counseling. Find a program and work it like your life depends on it!

SR is a great community, stick around.

Glad you are here!
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Old 05-13-2012, 08:41 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by jitz View Post
thank you everyone for your concerns and warm welcome.

Have not been online today, have been dealing with major issues regarding my home and rent - not what I need and the urge to buy a large bottle of spirits was with me all day.

I have drank today, I've had 5 4% beers so far and if it wasnt 1:45 am would happily double that - but I think I will just try and sleep instead

V - how did you find the sertraline? I have been MASSIVLY anxious since taking them. Am back at the doctors next week and he did say it might happen the first week or two. If this carries on am going to have to stop taking it or ask for some sort of sedetive just to get me through the day.

I really didnt realise just how messed up I had become until I started to do something about it.

J
Give it some time since the majority of the side effects are during the first two weeks. The worst side effect for me are the vivid dreams. Its not listed as a side effect, however if you go online and do some research you will see that a lot of people complain about this. Good luck!!
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Old 05-18-2012, 06:47 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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well its been about a week I think since my last post on here so thought I'd offer up an update.

I carried on taking the sertraline for a few days even though it was sending me mental, my brain was 'wooly' and I kept having audio and visual hallucinations and was totally unable to sleep for more than 20 minutes before electric shock type feelings would 'zap' me awake again.

This didnt help with my tapering off and I did indulge in a large bottle of scotch and a few beers after I stopped taking the tabs, though I could still feel the effects of them in my body.

It all came to a head last sunday, I had been vomiting with no sleep for about 4 days, as well as the scotch, and I kind of had some wieird fit in the bathroom, my brain must have totally melted down. I had felt it coming on for a few hours, my hearing had gone to pot and my vision kept flickering.

I stayed up again all night sunday, with no booze, knowing I had a doctors appointment on Monday. It got to about 8 am and had to call 999. My anxiety was through the roof, I was still being sick and my heart rate was flying. They took to me the hospital and gave me Librium which helped A LOT. took tests on my BP and heart rate etc.

The doctor said it was probably a combination of everything over the past few weeks, lack of food, sleep, medication, alcohol, stress but all the tests they did checked out ok and they sent in a worker from the local drug and alcohol clinic. I spoke to her for about an hour and agreed to go along to some meetings. That was all, then they sent me home.

I couldn't face going back to my empty ****** flat so laid the entire truth out to my family, who came to pick me up, my mother knows I've been in trouble in the past but she didnt know the extent of my behaviours. Luckily for me they have been very calm about the whole thing and I have decided to move back into my parents house for a month or 2 until I get my head back together. This week has gone pretty well, I have managed to cut the booze down to none in the day and 3 4% beers at night.

The only thing that bothers me is the doctor, I have asked him constantly for some kind of anti-anxiety meds but he just tells me if I feel anxious maybe I am not drinking enough?? Is it just me or is this lousy advice from a doctor?

We will see how this goes now, I have to attend a weekly meeting for 6 weeks at the drug/alcohol place before they will even think about any kind of detox. The more I look into it Im feeling I'd be better off just getting hold of some librium myself and just doing it at home.

Sorry for the long ramble again, it seems a lot has happened this week and I'm still not sure where my head is at.
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Old 05-20-2012, 11:56 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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That is terrible advice from a doctor Jitz! I'd keep changing doctors til you find one who listens...

These meetings..? Are they a UK thing? It really does seem to me that all the local drug and alcohol agencies encourage cutting down...and 6 weeks seems to be a long time to be having to do that! I know it's my pet hate and it shouldn't make me so angry but I can't see how 6 weeks cutting down before detox is going to help...? Does anyone else get this?

Are there any SMART or AA meetings in your area? It sounds like you could do with some face to face support with people who will actually 'get' what you're going through!

Glad you're with your family though x
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Old 05-20-2012, 03:35 PM
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These meetings are in the UK yeah. Basically its like a drop in center for drug/alcohol problems. From what I gathered from the very basic leaflets they gave me was to get a one on one counciller you need to attend 6 'lectures' on what alcohol does to the body etc. These are once a week - hence 6 weeks before you start to get any real help.

Just to rub salt into the already sore wound the 1st lecture was all about the amazing drugs they can use these days to help people who are having trouble stopping stop.

I doubt I'll go back for the other 5, will seek help elsewhere.

Yeah its good to be back at the parental home for a while. Its a huge weight of me to have sat down with them and be brutally honest. It was also good to catch up with other family members and meet my niece for the first time - she is 12 weeks old.

Ah well, registering with a new doctor tomorrow, hopefully he may be able to advise me more than the last one.

Jitz
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Old 05-20-2012, 03:54 PM
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Hi and good luck

My pennies worth - in a way its a obessive thing drinking it takes effort - im trying to break it by being obsessive about quitting - dont try not to think about it- do think about it all the time - i think one has to think about it being so important not to drink so much of a habit that it breaks the habit - because if your not looking that subconcious part of your brain that wants it will sneak in

Oh and drink tea as well
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Old 05-20-2012, 04:02 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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I'd go to the meetings anyway Jitz, it doesn't hurt to get all the help you can get. Just don't let it stop you from learning about other stuff too. It just sounded like they were forcing you to carry on drinking rather than encouraging abstinence, but maybe they're trying to weed out the people who are serious about quitting. If it means free detox then go for it x
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