Gertron

Hey everyone, I relapsed over the weekend I was invited out to some get togethers, and was offered drinks. 1 drink became 2, became 3 and so on..... I'm back to second day of sobriety. Is there any good way to keep reminding yourself to never touch that first drink? I let my guard down for 5 minutes and lost all the work I did.

BillyWeaver

Yeah I im in the same boat. Relapsed yesterday. I was only 4 days sober but still. The thing that keeps me going is remembering where I have been these past 5 years...the binge drinking, the hangovers where I feel like ripping my eyes out and dying, drinking to "cure" the said hangovers...I could go on and on

Dee74

welcome back Gertron and welcome Billy

the best way I learned to remind myself not to take that first drink was to really plug myself into regular recovery - coming here every day, for example, helps me remember..

I also declined invitations to things where I knew there'd be drinking - at least for a little while until I felt stronger.

It's not forever...and you don't have to be a hermit...but I think you do have to be a little bit discerning about where you hang out, and who you hang out with, in early recovery

D

tomsteve

Is there any good way to keep reminding yourself to never touch that first drink?

my memories. been fired and/or quit many very good jobs, watched poeple die from alcoholism( both in recovery and while still drinking), hated myself, wanted to die, the 4 horseman that were there every time after a good drunk,killed a man while i was drunk( i drank for 14 more years even after that),alcohol never solved any problem i had, gloom, dispair, and misery, and the MAJOR thing was i remember the pain of getting drunk exceeded the pain of reality. i know it will only take a few seconds and my past will become my future and i choose not to go through all of that again.

this may not have happened to you yet, but You're Eligible Too.

instant

We forget, unless we do something to remember. SR is brilliant for that.

CarolD

Gertron...

I too returned to drinking after I decided to quit.

Then I read a book..."Under The Influence' that opened my eyes
not everything applied to me but a lot sure did.

Here is a link to excerpts ..please see if it's useful for you

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html

I took that info...re connecdted to God and Aa....and I finally quit taking
that destructive first drink...

It also helped in early sobriety to quit hanging out with drinkers.
I meet new sober friends in AA....and we do all sorts of interesting things..sober..

CarolD

Hi Billy....Welcome....

Yes you too can win over alcohol...many members here are doing so
useing a variety of methods....

Me? I'm a long time AA member and it's worked out great

Change4good

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back at it. You can learn from your relapse, and move on. The only harm now is not getting back on track.

You can do it.

RobbyRobot

It was never as simple, for me, as just dont touch that first drink. I didn't drink to have a drink, I drank to get a drunken buzz going. It was the buzz what attracted me back to drinking time and again when I would quit my drinking.

Weirdly, accepting that compulsion, that deep mental obsession, that psychic high/low booze brought me -- my surrender to these experiences and my acceptance i could not control these experiences -- this is the safe place i found myself absolutely unable to pick up that next first drink.

There are many paths to this place of living sans alcohol. Whatever works is what works. The real deal for me was not about controlling the drinking, or controlling myself about the drinking -- the real deal was my being free to be myself and still not drink. This took surrender and acceptance of where i actually found myself when I at last successfully quit now many years ago.

Being ourselves while being clean n' sober is the ultimate all-natural high!

Take it easy about quitting booze. Its impossible to screw up quitting, when you really look at the whole deal. What can screw up is we don't hold on fast to the outstanding hard truths of living our lives without alcohol, and when that line is crossed, not drinking becomes a foolish game of failure.

Whatever makes you want to quit -- work with it, nourish it, care for it, be one with it, walk with it, talk about it, live with it.

I hope things go better for you. Don't quit on quitting. You'll get it done.

TorontoGuy28

I had to get really honest and STOP putting myself in risky situations.

Even with my best intention not to order that pint of beer over a business lunch, I somehow always did.... Insanity.

The first 90 days were absolutely critical in early recovery.

tomdecel

I think of sobriety as an airplane. An airplane needs thrust to overcome gravity, pick up speed and gain altitude. You kill the engines in mid flight and what happens? Same with sobriety. I need to work on it continuously to keep from crashing down. I make my need to live sober stronger than my need to get loaded, every day.

You can study AVRT, go into psychotherapy, do the steps, meditate, whatever works for you. Just keep thrusting forward.

Zebra1275

Alcoholics are quick to forget the painful aspects of their last drunk. That's why some people go to AA meetings or log onto SR everyday.

rws177

I sometimes read about my last relapse as a tool. This is were I was 14 months ago and have not had a drop since that night...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...8-relapse.html

Gottalife

Like you I was without defense against the first drink. It seems to be a characteristic of alcoholics of my type, the we can't bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the humiliation of last night, let alone a week ago. It just doesn't come to mind, which is why I believe fear, the thought that I might suffer as I see others suffer from taking that fatal first drink, is totally ineffective in helping me achieve permanent recovery.

There is a certain insanity with alcoholism and it is probably at its most obvious in the few seconds before taking the fatal first drink. In spite of overwhelming indications to the contrary, the alcoholic mind says its ok to drink, this time. How could an insane mind be capable of a sane thought? It's like asking the impossible.

I came to AA full of fear and willing to do anything that was asked of me to overcome my drinking. As I tried to follow suggestions, which I didn't often understand, It changed from fear to desire. It took a week or two for the clouds to lift, but then I began to see what a wonderful life was on offer if I kept following those suggestions. The suggestions were the 12 steps of AA, and the further I travelled down that path, the happier I became. By the time I was half way through step 9, sanity had returned, the desire to drink was long gone and at last, I had an effective defense. It just doesn't occur to me to drink now. The idea never comes up, I have so many better things to do.

DayTrader

Gertron.......if ^^^^^^ doesn't make any sense..... lol, welcome to AA. It took me a while before I understood stuff like that. It does make complete sense to me now...and it can/will to you too if you use AA and the 12-steps. Some of the concepts seem "backwards" at first but, on the bright side, doing what seemed to make sense to most of us always resulted in another night drinking so the fact that AA seems so odd is actually a good thing.

2granddaughters

Yes, it's a daily reprieve. Are you going to AA meetings?

All the best.

Bob R (near Windsor)

Jeb18

When your near a drink take 10 steps back, and you'll never drink. LOL. Was it worth it though?

THEOjibway

Not much I can add myself. Everyone here has given you tons of advice. But it reminded me of everything this time last year when I was living on my own for the first time and I drank while on my own. Real bad things happened while drinking, almost losing my job, and my life to be honest. I remind myself everything that happened last year and I keep my chin up. I don't beat myself down anymore when I remember what happened. If anything I grow stronger because I am sober today. Reflecting on what you have done is a good way to remind yourself what happens when you pick up that first drink. I've also heard from a wise AA member say in a discussion that the best way he reminds himself why not to pick up that first drink by thinking what happens at the end when he picks up instead of imagining what happens when he first sips. It really helped me alot and thank god this thursday I've reached 9 months of being sober. Good luck my friend, it really works if you really want it and I know I do. Nothing but good things have been happening in my life that I never imagined last year while drinking.

tomsteve

. Is there any good way to keep reminding yourself to never touch that first drink? I let my guard down for 5 minutes and lost all the work I did.

dont let yer guard down.

now, to remind the me part of "yourself" in yer question, i remembered all of the gloom, dispair, and misery oif drinking.