Back in that horrible place
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 41
Back in that horrible place
Well I did it again, I relapsed after 3 months sober and I'm coming down off a 6 day bender. God why I do this to myself. I'm going to an AA meeting tomorrow, after begging the wife to give me one last chance.
I'm in that dark place of guilt, shame, regret. The only thing keeping me going right now is that I know it will get better.
I'm in that dark place of guilt, shame, regret. The only thing keeping me going right now is that I know it will get better.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 41
Originally Posted by sugarbear1 
Welcome back!
What can you do differently this time?
I wish you well!
What can you do differently this time?
I wish you well!
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Glad you are back and don't ever give up. Your life does not have to play out that way. You can quit. You can walk free, but it's not going to happen on it's own. You must decide. As sugarbear said, you might want to think about what you are going to do differently. Best to you and hang in.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,564
Hi Hip. How I remember that dreaded feeling. I finally stopped fantasizing that I could control the amounts I drank - that somehow 'this time' I'd use my willpower and not overdo it. For us, that's not possible. Such a hard lesson to learn, but we can learn it - and never go back to that miserable place again.
You can do it, and this time it can be forever. A whole new life awaits you.
You can do it, and this time it can be forever. A whole new life awaits you.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,954
Originally Posted by Hip2beSquare
...why I do this to myself...
I say do the regret and disappointment stuff some time down the road. Focus on how you are going to change for the better, because you can do this but it takes full attention to do it.
Linkin Park Enthusiast
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 548
You do this to yourself because you are human. So what? So are the rest of us.
We all make mistakes. And you need to be commended because you are already working on fixing your mistake. Some people just relapse, and continue, because they already messed up, might as well continue messing up.
Congratulations for owning up to it. Now get out there and continue not drinking!
We all make mistakes. And you need to be commended because you are already working on fixing your mistake. Some people just relapse, and continue, because they already messed up, might as well continue messing up.
Congratulations for owning up to it. Now get out there and continue not drinking!
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Many of us had false starts before we actually quit...I sure did.
However...when I began working my AA Steps...I found solid recovery...
Welcome back Hip..
However...when I began working my AA Steps...I found solid recovery...
Welcome back Hip..
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Il
Posts: 42
Originally Posted by Hip2beSquare
AA has to help, it's my last chance. I've already taken the first step of admitting I am powerless with alcohol.
SHARING THE LOAD
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: In the Slowlane
Posts: 878
Hi Hip,
Thanks you for your update and very glad you survived to post here after 6 days in oblivion. However, it can get much worse with untreated alcoholism, been there done that no need anymore. Hope you stick around the meeting to get a good welcome.
Thanks you for your update and very glad you survived to post here after 6 days in oblivion. However, it can get much worse with untreated alcoholism, been there done that no need anymore. Hope you stick around the meeting to get a good welcome.
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 14,921
God why I do this to myself?
My guess is, it's because you are an alcoholic.
I don't know if begging your wife to give you one last chance will work. She's probably heard it all before.
If your wife stays with you it won't be because of anything you say, it will be because of your actions. So go to an AA meeting tomorrow and try to get a temporary sponsor. Keep going to meetings, if you are desperate enough, do 90 meetings in 90 days. That's tough, but it will show your wife the depth of your committment to sobriety.
My guess is, it's because you are an alcoholic.
I don't know if begging your wife to give you one last chance will work. She's probably heard it all before.
If your wife stays with you it won't be because of anything you say, it will be because of your actions. So go to an AA meeting tomorrow and try to get a temporary sponsor. Keep going to meetings, if you are desperate enough, do 90 meetings in 90 days. That's tough, but it will show your wife the depth of your committment to sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 138
Find a program of recovery that works for you, commit to it, and follow through. That's what I did to get sober. I used AA, but there are lots of options. Recovery is an ongoing process which takes work on your part. Everyday I get up and I commit to 1 more day sober. Some days are easier than others. For me commitment and the willingness to work a program of recovery are key to my staying sober. Best of luck.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
Originally Posted by Hip2beSquare
Yes
Then make sure you get a big book and read it.
Let us know how it goes.
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