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I Cannot Stay Sober

Old 04-08-2012, 09:30 AM
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I Cannot Stay Sober

I did treatment for 2.5 months. I was sober while I had to be because I was in treatment. I don`t know what to do. Yes I`m in AA. Yes I have a sponsor that I will shortly be starting to work the steps with. I don`t want to die of this.
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Old 04-08-2012, 09:49 AM
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Originally Posted by LifeBlows View Post
I did treatment for 2.5 months. I was sober while I had to be because I was in treatment. I don`t know what to do. Yes I`m in AA. Yes I have a sponsor that I will shortly be starting to work the steps with. I don`t want to die of this.
Same here. What I found to be true and believe is true for those of us who just can't stay sober is that if we are willing to call before we drink, and make our best effort to progress through our steps without flaking out, running off, or shortcutting things we are able to stay sober.

And those who choose to veer off and follow their inspired ideas eventually suffer from their choices.

No one I know likes to do this stuff, but the alternative is less pleasant. And on the other side of all that work is a good life where alcohol and all the drinking trouble is no longer the least concern.

So if you don't want to drink the rest of your life and more importantly live far better, then do those things. Not a complicated equation.

I'm a guy who couldn't stay sober for more than a few weeks or rarely some months. Often I'd decide firmly not to drink and wouldn't last a day. In another week I'll complete 30 years of this solution working well. No booze, no drugs.

You could be saying the same in April of 2042, unless of course you come up with a better plan along the way. Then you're pretty screwed.
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Old 04-08-2012, 10:53 AM
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Originally Posted by LifeBlows View Post
I did treatment for 2.5 months. I was sober while I had to be because I was in treatment. I don`t know what to do. Yes I`m in AA. Yes I have a sponsor that I will shortly be starting to work the steps with. I don`t want to die of this.
Don't get down on yourself. You can stay sober. It is completely in your power to not pick up a drink---as long as you choose not to pick up.

At the end of the day, you just have to make the right decisions. It's all up to you man. It's great that you've got an AA sponsor and that you've sought treatment, but those things are only for support so that you can do what you need to do---to make the right decisions.

Lots of people have learned to make the right decisions. You can too. So cheer up!

But it's not easy. There are no special tricks that are going to make getting sober a walk in the park. For a while it's going to be very unpleasant. But if you remain steadfast and resolute, you'll get through it, and after a while you'll start feeling a LOT better. Just stick it out man! You can do it, and there are plenty of people around to help encourage you along the way.

Good luck!
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Old 04-08-2012, 01:47 PM
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I'm really sorry to see you're still struggling LB.

I hope you'll find that a sponsor and the Steps is your key to getting out of the madness

D
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Old 04-08-2012, 08:30 PM
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Langkah said it "choice" - my disease wants to KILL me.... and so it had me convinced that all that work it might take to get and stay sober was not worth my time. much easier to sit and use....
it took real effort to develop a feeling of self worth - i was only trying to undo decades of actions guaranteed to keep me down.
AA [and NA] gave me the means to change that slow suicidal dynamic.
And for me, that meant [and still means] that i do the WHOLE deal- meetings, sponsor, steps, service- no more of my old shortcuts , excuses, procrastinations, BS. Just get in there and work it like my ass was on fire....

i came to understand that sage who said: "Your time is running fast. Pay attention!"
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Old 04-08-2012, 09:10 PM
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Keep trying. I had 2 setbacks after rehab, but what I had was a great set of tools to pick myself back up and do it again. Practice not perfection.

You can do this. Think about how many days over the last 3 months you haven't drank. I bet it's a big improvement from the 3 months before that.
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Old 04-09-2012, 05:23 AM
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i was in and out of rehabs and tried to get sober for over a decade before it stuck. i truely thought i was one of those people who would never get any time under their belt.

While i'm only a couple of years into sobriety, there is one thing that i have now that i never had before...that was a constant want to be sober more than i wanted to be drunk.

I play the whole tape through nowadays...all of the consequences, I mean. An really, it was only because i was teetering on the brink of death did i see that I had to abandon any hope that i could ever drink again.

what really helped me was carrying around a list of things that would happen to me if i drank again..I still have it and i'll copy it down for you. it was kinda a warning label i carried everywhere with me.

drinking any amount will lead to: shaking, nausea, hallucinations, seizures, itching, bugs crawling on me, nightmares, insomnia, headaches, lying, disappointment, fear, paranoia, anger, hopelessness, sadness, desperation, and death.

I probably read that list 2000 times before i hit a month of constant sobriety. for me, when i was locked in a desire, i forgot all of that. keeping the list dragged it to the front of my mind so i could see what would happen.

chin up. you'll get there.
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Old 04-09-2012, 06:14 AM
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Originally Posted by LifeBlows View Post
I did treatment for 2.5 months. I was sober while I had to be because I was in treatment. I don`t know what to do. Yes I`m in AA. Yes I have a sponsor that I will shortly be starting to work the steps with. I don`t want to die of this.
Personally, I think a positive attitude can go a long way, and if you're interested in having a positive attitude, you could get a major jump on it, by changing your user name. I'm not saying you have to become Suzie Sunshine, but LifeBlows??????
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Old 04-09-2012, 06:44 AM
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Originally Posted by LifeBlows View Post
I did treatment for 2.5 months. I was sober while I had to be because I was in treatment. I don`t know what to do. Yes I`m in AA. Yes I have a sponsor that I will shortly be starting to work the steps with. I don`t want to die of this.
Sounds like you've got the tools... now you just have to apply them.

You can stay sober if you don't stick the bottle in your mouth. Call your sponsor before you drink, not after.

Are you committed to AA or just involved ??

The difference is like a bacon & egg breakfast,

The chicken is involved and the pig is committed.


I agree with wheresthefun as well. You keep thinking LifeBlows and you'll believe your own horse-s#!t. Your choice.

All the best.

Bob R
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Old 04-09-2012, 06:57 AM
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Originally Posted by macknacat View Post
Langkah said it "choice" - my disease wants to KILL me....AA [and NA] gave me the means to change that slow suicidal dynamic.
And for me, that meant [and still means] that i do the WHOLE deal- meetings, sponsor, steps, service- no more of my old shortcuts , excuses, procrastinations, BS. Just get in there and work it like my ass was on fire....
Yes! This is where I am also. No way can I quit on my own, I need people who "get it", and the tools of recovery that AA offers; the book, sponsor, steps, and since I'm pretty new, service in small ways like making coffee, connecting with people, setting up chairs, helping to clean up after the meeting.
It's been very different for me to ask for help and take direction. I struggle with the direction part; "nobody tells me what to do", but trying to catch that old thinking and turn it around and it seems to be working. I never did that before in AA or NA. It's made a difference. Good luck to you, LifeBlows.
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