Flyersfan

Im seeing this girl, and everytime I have seen her ive been drinking. I haven't drank in a few days but she wants to come over tonight... I want to stay strong and not drink... so im thinking about just telling her that I am working late... She is not a big drinker at all btw...

What would you do?

Flyin2BFree

Tell her what's up with you and see if she supports you by saying she won't drink tonight. You may be suprised. But, if she says, "hey that's yer problem bro, I'm drinking" then ditch her.

oh, btw, I'm on day one

FF

Flyersfan

No she wouldnt drink, I just dont get why I feel the need to drink when shes round... rather just sit home alone ... weird huh

InsertNameHere

Why is it that you feel compeled to drink around her? to relax, to not be annoyed, because she does/wants to? If you answer that then you have a better understanding of whether or not she should be allowed in your life or if it is you that is causing the problem.

Without more information my answer is probably overly simple. Tell her to come on over, don't drink.

DayTrader

For me..... alcohol was my "fix-it-all" tool. I wouldn't believe that at the time........but looking back, I drank AT just about everything. Wanna play golf better, get a buzz on. Wanna last longer in the sack with a girl, get a buzz on. Wanna pick up girls, get a buzz on. Wanna be comfortable in a stressful business negotiation, get a slight buzz on. Wanna REALLY have a nice relaxing evening without having to go anywhere special, get a buzz on at home.

....... old habits, sometimes, die slow deaths.

InsertNameHere

No not weird, at least not to me. I have always been nothing but thumbs when it came to women (I mean no offense in what follows ladies) and anymore would almost rather not have them around. I just feel akward and somhow unworthy? (thats not the right word but its close enough). So I understand the desire to rather be alone than have her around, though probably for different reasons than you.

My question still stands as I am not you, why do you feel compeled to drink when she is there?

Flyersfan

Its almost that I'd rather be doing other things , and I just feel bored when shes around... but I pretty much feel bored with a lot of things in my life

InsertNameHere

Well I am probably not going to be much help there then, the last relationship I had ended up the same way. When I started almost dreading the days that she was going to come over because I knew I was going to be bored to tears is when I broke up with her. That was about six years ago though so I have been out of the game for a while . That last part was just to give you an idea of my experience (next to none) in relationships so you can put any of my advice in perspective.

Dee74

Please remember this forum is open to a wide variety of members of all ages and from all works of life.

I removed some inappropriate posts.

not drink - seriously.

Recovery needed to be my priority - if anything else is more important to you, you're making a hard road for yourself Flyer.

If you need to drink to feel comfortable or whatever - thats something you really need to deal with, I think.

D