Stopped going to meetings?
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by CoreyS 
...and I have no plans on drinking ever again.
Peace, Love, Sobriety
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Wilmington, DE
Posts: 1,549
Whatever helps you stay sober, do it. It doesn't have to be the steps if you don't agree with them. Just find something that makes you feel happier as a person while staying sober.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,949
I think it's an commendable that your going to give back to the community as an addictions counselor. I know for myself that AA's 12 steps wasn't for me and I needed a viable alternative to be recovered from addiction. The addiction treatment profession was just what I needed for ethical, qualified and efficient help with my once hopeless addiction disorder.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Originally Posted by zencat
The addiction treatment profession was just what I needed for ethical, qualified and efficient help with my once hopeless addiction disorder.
lol
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 583
I like you sobered up early. No one is the same. I will say that passing on in some way your experience will help that feeling. For me my body bounced back quick and God gave me a pass on my obsession.
Please take this from a person sober 20 years. If you do ever start drinking again the chances are of sobering up and staying sober decrees dramatically. Not only that the chances of your dying early go up exponentially. While I don't have the exact numbers I have 20 years sober eyes.
You may have cleaned out most of the bag on your back but we add stuff back in on a daily basis. So keep active somewhere.... As my kids say.. Just saying....
Please take this from a person sober 20 years. If you do ever start drinking again the chances are of sobering up and staying sober decrees dramatically. Not only that the chances of your dying early go up exponentially. While I don't have the exact numbers I have 20 years sober eyes.
You may have cleaned out most of the bag on your back but we add stuff back in on a daily basis. So keep active somewhere.... As my kids say.. Just saying....
Originally Posted by CoreyS
Hello, I'm new to this board. Let me first start by saying that I have over 13 months of sobriety under my belt from alcohol and drugs (alcohol was really my DOC though). I am 23 years old. I did the 90 meetings in 90 days in the beginning (more like 120 meetings in 90 days) and continued to go daily for another couple of months. I started working more and then cut back to 5 meetings a week. 5 months into my sobriety I moved to a different state with my parents. I went to the meetings in my new area and I just wasn't into it. The last meeting I went to was when I got my 6 month chip. I am not a religious person at all, I never got a sponsor, although I did make some close friends In my original state that were closer to my age. Today I have absolutely no desire to drink, but I have begun to feel guilty that I have stopped going to meetings. I almost went on my one year anniversary, but I felt I would not be sending a good message to the new-comers. I feel that AA is very important and I can say I would not have been able to stay sober during my first 90 days without the meetings. On the other hand, I feel like going to meetings makes me constantly think about drinking, and when I don't go, I think about drinking for weeks at a time with no problem.
Am I right in feeling guilty? Let me reiterate that since I have stopped going to meetings I have remained sober, held a job, and continued to go to school with no ill effects and I have no plans on drinking ever again.
Thank you,
Corey S
Am I right in feeling guilty? Let me reiterate that since I have stopped going to meetings I have remained sober, held a job, and continued to go to school with no ill effects and I have no plans on drinking ever again.
Thank you,
Corey S
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by stugotz
When I feel guilty, I usually am. Just sayin...
Guilt is and was never a simplistic gotcha! thing for me. Just sayin...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Merritt Island, Fl
Posts: 1,164
Originally Posted by RobbyRobot
Yeah, so true. And sometimes the guilt I felt was for leaving behind a life that wasn't working. Strange, eh?!
Guilt is and was never a simplistic gotcha! thing for me. Just sayin...
Guilt is and was never a simplistic gotcha! thing for me. Just sayin...
"Smart men learn from their mistakes, Wise men learn from the mistakes of others" I had to have this tattooed on my brain. Just sayin....
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 120
The AA 12-Steps and meetings don't have a monopoly on those sober in recovery. But for me, it was the last thing I tried that continues to work. Someone once told me although you can survive in barrel over Niagara Falls, doesn't mean it's a top choice for transportation.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 120
The AA 12-Steps and meetings don't have a monopoly on those sober in recovery. But for me, it was the last thing I tried that works. Someone once told me although you can survive in barrel over Niagara Falls, doesn't mean it's a preferred choice for transportation.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by CoreyS
I feel that AA is very important and I can say I would not have been able to stay sober during my first 90 days without the meetings. On the other hand, I feel like going to meetings makes me constantly think about drinking, and when I don't go, I think about drinking for weeks at a time with no problem.
Am I right in feeling guilty?
Am I right in feeling guilty?
Whether it's "right" that you feel guilty or not is impossible to say. ....and regardless of whether it's "right" or not......you FEEL that way. You can either address it or not.
I'll say.....I'd feel guilty myself though if I wasn't giving back to AA what I took from AA.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by sugarbear1
My sponsor agrees with helping others as an avocation, 'cause if you're gettin' paid for it, it's called a JOB.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: in the shadow of the rockies
Posts: 338
a few years ago- right after my sons TBi accident, i ran across an old friend. we had not seen each other in over a decade, He knew i was doing AA, He had almost 20 yrs sober without AA [had done AA early on, maybe a year] he had an 8 yr old son now. Turns out we all really liked to fish for bass and pike
So we started to hang out . And my son and i were discovering that fishing was the one place we could still connect. So this friend observed my challenges with my son. And he observed my responses . Turns out he was really feeling challenged as a father and husband. Had been thru some depression . Lots of anger...
Anyway, one day he just calls me and says "man, I really really want what you have. I think I 'm gonna go to a meeting"
Today, he is working 12 steps hard . And he's pro active in anger therapy, parenting classes, etc etc.... he and his son are the poster children for what a father and son should do- they are so damn beautiful together it just melts my heart.
Some one else commented that 12 steps give us more than just a lesson in how not to drink. For me [and for that buddy of mine] it has certainly been true.
So we started to hang out . And my son and i were discovering that fishing was the one place we could still connect. So this friend observed my challenges with my son. And he observed my responses . Turns out he was really feeling challenged as a father and husband. Had been thru some depression . Lots of anger...
Anyway, one day he just calls me and says "man, I really really want what you have. I think I 'm gonna go to a meeting"
Today, he is working 12 steps hard . And he's pro active in anger therapy, parenting classes, etc etc.... he and his son are the poster children for what a father and son should do- they are so damn beautiful together it just melts my heart.
Some one else commented that 12 steps give us more than just a lesson in how not to drink. For me [and for that buddy of mine] it has certainly been true.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters
There is a big difference between dry and sober.
Would you kindly explain the difference between 'dry' and 'sober'?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,180
Many people stop drinking without AA. you have stopped drinking, are sober and committed to not drinking again. I don't think you need to feel pressured into going to meetings if you feel they would be of no benefit to you. When I went to AA it was drummed into me that not attending meetings means you will drink again-if you know this isn't the case, as you have seen over the last few months then you have to ask yourself what benefit would there be in attending or feeling guilty about not attending.
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
Originally Posted by bluoval
I agree AA does not have a monopoly on sobriety. But, my question is, why wouldn't someone want to go to AA?
I think you're answering your own question -- AA is not the only show in town. That is reason enough, yeah? Whatever works for the individual is the best way forward. For some, that means choices. For some others, it means only one choice.
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