doggonecarl

I'm with Smacked. There was something extremely liberating about knowing I could "never" drink again. No more trying to convince myself I didn't have a problem, or that I could moderate. I wasn't a normal drinker; I was never going to be a normal drinker; hence I could never drink. Ever.

There is life and freedom on the other side. Stay sober and you'll see.

Zencat

Hi Hopeless71, welcome to SR.

I found it takes some time for the mind/body to rebound from years of alcohol abuse, so be patient please.

Regularly participating here at SR is a great recovery tool. I would suggest getting some more recovery tools together and make a recovery plan out of them. Below are some great links to recovery principles (tools) that may interest you.

SOS' and 'LifeRing
SMART Tools and SMART Articles
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Addiction Recovery Tools from cbtrecovery.com
DBT Life Skills For Emotional Health Great tools for maintaining sobriety. (from dbtselfhelp.com/index.html)
Rational Recovery: The New Cure for Substance Addiction. By Jack Trimpey. (Google book preview including the Addiction Voice Recognition Technique or the AVRT)

CarolD

Hopeless....
Welcome to our recovery community

Early sobreity is difficult and confusing for most of us
please give yourself time to heal.

Hopeless71

I really was nervous about joining this site for various reasons, however I must say it has really been an amazing source of support from you all. I can t believe the amount of growth that I have experienced in the very short time by reading and hearing from everyone. Desertsong I am going to look at my sobriety just for today "right now" and not worry so much about ever again, it's a great point.

Holly7 my kids are such a driving force and the true joy they bring is unreal. I really don't want my boys to grow up watching me drink, and believe, that's just what men do. Unfortunately my daughter has seen me drink more than I would have liked, mostly in her early years. Whats kind of odd to me is my drinking was so much worse in my late 20's and early 30's usually 10 to 12 beers a night for a least 10 years, then i realize there was a problem but didnt want tmo stop so I scaled back to maybe 6 to 8 beers 5 nights a week and has been that way since 6 days ago. And it's still a problem, thats why I have scaled back again, to zero beers a night.

Smacked and doggonecarl, I pray I will get to that point, and can one day re-pay those exact words.

I am looking forward to look into the resources
you posted zencat thank you.

Everyone else thank you for everything, with the support of you all I will get to day 7...

2granddaughters

Must be quite different across the bridge here in Windsor. I went to rehab with Fire Marshals, Ontario Provincial Police, Windsor Police Sergeant, Chief of Staff doctors, Customs Officers along with the usual lawyers, priests and convicted killers.
I'm sure if you asked around you would meet lots of recovering cohorts in AA, Brighton etc.

I wish you the best in your recovery.

Bob R

Hopeless71

Bob r,

Sometimes I think things are a bit different here, just like insertnamehere said it is often encouraged and at times pushed on you. But I am finding out that I will work at it my way, and I'm not going to worry about them finding out my situation, if they do, they do. Thanks for the info about AA, I may just do that.

NYCDoglvr

Hi ... this alcoholic (recovering) can relate to your post. This is the disease of "yets". I haven't lost my job ... yet. Haven't lost my home ... yet. Alcoholism is a progressive disease. I started out just like you. I took a drink, the drink took me and at the end I was a blackout drinker consuming a magnum (two bottles) of wine every day.

I commend you on facing your problem squarely. In AA's "Big Book" Bill Wilson says "alcohol is but a symptom". Boy is that true.

BlueMoon

Hi Hopeless and welcome to the forum!
(is it poor taste to say that while I don't know any police officers *personally*, I have met a great many of them when they have come knocking at my door to take my {alcoholic} husband off . . . ? ok - I'm bad . . . )

Seriously - I totally agree with what Dee74 said about breaking the time down into smaller/more manageable pieces. "FOREVER"?
But one day - one hour - heck, 10 minutes sometimes - isn't so huge and UNdo-able. That has helped me thru ALOT of rough times.

One thought - if you are interested in rehab, would going out-of-state be a possibility? Just a stray thought . . .

oh and - imho - AA ROCKS!

Blue

Hopeless71

Blue moon,

That's what I'm going to focus on I think, anything is worth a try at this point. Thanks for the post, it really does help. BTW love the Poe(never more) quote. My fav poem!

InsertNameHere

I am really new to it but what has been working for me this week (haven't finished it yet) has been Rational Recovery/AVRT (addictive voice recognition training). Coming from similar backgrounds it might help you as well. There are threads about it in the secular connections forum, I am still making my way through them as they have answered a lot of questions already and the insite there and from supporters on my thread have really helped me.

Just giving you more options to choose from.