DrunkDan now SoberDan
 

Hi SR, Just wanted to introduce my self and tell a bit of my story, I'm 35 and have been drunk every day for 20yrs an now I am 3 months sober.
I have a mortgage a beautiful wife a 2 wonderful children one is four and the other is one. my children are a big reason why I am sober today, I couldn't stand to have them grow up with an alcoholic father I don't want them to be alcoholics and I didn't want to die before they grew up and with the amount I was drinking I don't think I had too many years left in me. I was drinking a bottle of rum a day about 20 standard drink and more on weekends for as long as I can remember. I use to wake up sick and feeling guilty every day. I use to think about alcohol 24hrs a day, when i was working I'd spend all morning wishing I didn't drink then all afternoon wishing I had a drink.
I have lost my license 3 times and as a truck driver I was still driving over the limit every morning.
it got too the point where I couldn't have a shower without taking a drink, I couldn't drive without a drink between my legs and I couldn't even play cricket with my son because I couldn't put my drink down, if I wasn't working I had a drink glued to my hand.
I tried every thing to cut down or stop, only drinking light beer, not drinking alone, not drinking at home I even tried ant abuse and drank on that (don't try it). I can't even remember how many full bottles of rum I've poured down the drain just too prove to myself that I was never going to drink ever again. But inside me lives a Monster that was always stronger than me, I always felt like I was fighting someone else inside me that wanted to drink and it wasn't me , its not till you really try to quit that you realize how much trouble your in.
So after hundreds of attempts on my own and two attempts at AA I am now 3 months sober and Loving it. AA and my children are what got me sober.
I haven't been going to many AA meetings now but I know they will always be there for me if I feel I need them.
I have just fully! accepted that I am or was alcoholic" I don't care! and very addicted to alcohol. And have made a decision to never ever drink that poison again as long as I live "one day at a time" if I need to.
If I ever get an urge to drink or start thinking about what it use to feel like I just remember that it is my Monster or "disease" trying to get me to drink.
Today I love my life ( i use to hate it) and am very grateful for every thing I have, A beautiful wife two wonderful boys a roof over my head a car and a job.
Now I can play cricket with my son my wife doesn't have to drive me everywhere, I surf every day I go fishing when the weather is good and I don't ever have a hangover.
Now I work on always staying positive and not thinking negative thoughts, living in the moment and not worring about the past or future and I don't forget that any thoughts about drinking is just that Monster inside me and he will never ever trick me or win again.
I love being sober it is not easy but it is great.
I am anxiously waiting for my new book Rational Recover because I relate so much to the Beast or "Monster", I think if I take a bit from everyone that has something to teach I should be OK and I then maybe be able to help someone else.
I am very thankful to AA, Allan Carrs and now SR.

Dont want to **** on your bonfire but if you dont remember you are an alcoholic everyday you are screwed. I see this happen at AA all the time. Person comes in screwed and starts to grow over the following weeks. Gradually their ego returns as they think they have cracked sobriety and dont need AA or any form of recovery anymore. Give it a few more months and the ego has told them to try some controlled drinking again.

Bang they are right back to where they started.

Hi Dan
Welcome to SR :)

sounds to me like you're doing pretty well - congratulations on the improvements in your life :)

D

Congratulations on your 3 months SoberDan. Sound like you are doing everything you need to do for you and your family. Nice to see post like yours. Wishing you much success.

Well Come

Dont want to **** on your bonfire but if you dont remember you are an alcoholic everyday you are screwed.

That is AAs belief and I respect that, but as I have found there are many Happy sober people that have stopped drinking without AA. I am gratefull to be sober everyday.

Congrats on 3 months!!!:c011:

Awesome. welcome to SR

What I am trying to say is that you have been drinking for more than 20 years which is more than half your life. If you believed you have cracked it after 3 months then well done.

I thought the same once. Then I tried controlled drinking again ended up being barred from 10 plus joints in less than that amount of days and ending up having to leave town fast.

This takes time for you to learn how to live sober. I do realise you have done it without AA but I would take the AA advice of a day at a time at the moment.

SoberDan - Thanks for your example, Friend.

SR is at its best when we are valuing and learning from each other's experiences rather than beating one another over the head with our respective truths. I need that reminder now and then.

Thanks Tomsk, I will take it a day at a time and not pick up that first drink. I don't think Ive cracked it I'm only 3 months , as I said its not easy but it is great. i think ultimately what we want is to be happy to be sober and I feel like that today , tomorrow might be different.

:c011: Love it SD! Welcome to SR :ring

Nice to meet you SoberDan:
Sounds like you're on the right track.. "on the beam".

Wishing you the best in recovery.

Bob R. (also in the colonies)

I've only been without alcohol for about 2 weeks. But I have family in AA and have been to meetings in the past as a visitor. I know it works for a lot of people but I don't think I am one of those people. I have been going it alone with support from some close friends and family that know what I am doing and with help on these forums. I've read some Rational Recovery stuff on recommendation of other people here and I personally relate to that more as well. But I think everyone should use whatever helps them not drink. Congrats on 3 months!

Hi Dan

Congrats on your achievement

I am only on day 26 but have also read RR and can highly recommend it. I know AA works for many many people but for various reasons it is not for me and as others have said, it is not the only way. So I gave RR a try and it is brilliant. As I said, I'm very early into this but if I keep feeling like I do now then I will remain happy. I feel like a big weight has been lifted off my shoulders and out of my life.

good luck

Good spot to be in SD, enjoy it.

Welcome to SR!

Thankyou all for making me feel so welcome, I think it is amazing to have so many people supporting each other world wide. Today is 14 weeks sober for me.

Congratulations Dan! You sound how I felt at that stage. I still feel that way and I am 17 months sober now.

I used SR and RR for my recovery. I feel grateful/conscious every day for my recovery but not scared of relapse.

Enjoy your kids. I have small ones too. Parenting sober is a whole different ballgame!

Hello and congratulations to SoberDan!!!! You sound so happy. Best wishes for a continued journey into health and sanity!