TexasGuy

I found this site last year as I wanted to try to stop drinking. My will power wasn't very strong. I continued to drink since I was last on here. I have tried to stop many times from drinking. I can go about 4 days with out it and then I stop at a gas station to pick up beer.

I can say that I have cut back tremendously but I want to stop completely It's hurting my wife and kids which I love very much. The alcohol has affeccted them. They see me as a drunk because when I do drink now I have to get drunk. My wife and kids hate seeing me drunk. I hate it! As I type out this I lay in bed regreting the night before because I got drunk.

I drink for several reasons and when I look back at those reasons none of them make sense. My wife is a pretty smart woman and she is fed up with my drinking. She tells me that when I drink it only makes my problems go away for the meantime. That when I wake up the problems are still there and sometimes the are worse.

I don't hang around friends who drink anymore which I thought I'd be able to quit after that. But I found my self drinking at home by myself now. I have told my wife several times I wanted to quit. But I found my self buying beer and sneaking it or hiding it from her. She knows this and tries to understand the mind of an alcoholic but can't since she's not a drinker her self. I have made may excuses for my alcoholism but I am done make excuse and want to fix it.

I would like to find some local help to get on a solid path of recovery. Any ideas are welcome that can be free.

I really want to stop before I lose my wife and kids.

TheEnd

What have you tried to stop?

TexasGuy

Before I tried AA meeting but as right nothing other than me just trying.

Anna

Hi and Welcome,

Yeah, drinking never makes the problems go away for very long. And, alcoholism is a progressive disease and it will get worse unless you stop, so good for you for choosing to stop.

SR of course, is free and there's lots of support here. AA is easily available and SMART is an option many people use too.

suki44883

AA is free. Check out this link for a substantial list of meetings in your area:

Central Service Office of San Antonio | Where you will find Alcoholics Anonymous

2granddaughters

+1 on AA

Ghostlight

I could have written your post two years ago, except I'm not married, and therefore had no one two be responsible to.

I tried for years to quit, so I can totaly relate. I came here, what? Four years ago? And I've been sober two now. That's how long it took me.

Do what you have to to get sober. Go to AA, pray if you're a praying man. Come here and post and read the others posts. If you have a strong enough desire, yes, you can quit drinking.
I did after a thirty year drinking career. And, like you, I drank to get drunk. One or two drinks isn't in my vocabulary, I drank to get drunk. Plain and simple.

Alcoholism is a chronic, progressive and relapsing disease. And believe me, you will progress in your drinking till you are at the nadir of not being able to stop and not being able to drink.

I really feel for you. Your post moved me because, as I said, that was me for a long, long time.

Best to you and your family. Do whatever it takes to get sober. I did, and I was a hopeless drunk. You can do it too and miss the suffering I went through.

Zebra1275

If you are truly sick and tired of alcohol then go to an AA meeting and tell the group you are a newcomer and ask for help. Then do what they say.

langkah

'I have made may excuses for my alcoholism but I am done make excuse and want to fix it.'

If you could, with all the desire you show I think you would have done that. Perhaps you're an alcoholic who can't fix themselves with good intentions, for great reasons, utilizing self-help charts and books, and with the strongest of desires. One like me.

If so, it means your choices are limited. You can try to find people to fix you, but if their ideas don't work then pursuing a spiritual way of life to have your problem removed may be left as your only remaining option. That worked for me when all the good ideas from well-meaning folk did not. Obviously, that required actually doing all the stuff the sober people suggested and not shortcutting things, hoping to get by well enough by doing less.

We may now both be in the middle of our last chance. Your family is not yet lost to you. If you give up fighting this losing battle on your own you'll likely get to keep them, which would be a good thing. But either way, now or later, you can start a better life when you're ready to make use of the experience of the millions of AAs that have gone ahead of you.

Not a good idea to put off taking action, as things can go south in a hurry at any time when we drink.

TexasGuy

Today is my 3 rd day with out drinking. So far so good. No urge to drink yet. Only thing is that I have been laying around a lot. Just feel drained of energy. Is this normal?

BASEjumper

That's not unusual. So you're on day 3, by your own admission you drink around day 4. So you've got a day or two left until you start all over again.

Are you planning on doing anything differently between now and when you go to stop off at the gas station next?

TheJungianThing

Another echo for AA. All three parts of it.

TexasGuy

i just have to keep telling myself alcohol is bad for me. nothing good comes out from drinking it. i just went to the grocery store to get some stuff and i did good. didn't even look twice at the isle with all the beer. that has to count for something there. as far as the gas station goes ...pay at the pump and avoid going in there. i will switch my routine...gas up in the mornings before work instead at night.

i want to win this time!

i hope i can attend some AA meets this week.

ReadyAndAble

Good for you, TexasGuy! You can win, no doubt about it. You never have to wake up to that feeling of regret again. Do whatever it takes. If a meeting will help, then don't hope—make it happen. I found I only succeeded by making recovery my No. 1 priority, especially during those first few weeks. Really smart move, mixing up the old routines. Keep it up!

susanlauren

Texas Guy,
If you really want to quit drinking and stay quit ... choose a recovery program and do everything that that program suggests you do. 100% wholeheartedly. I imagine nothing stood in the way of your drinking; nothing should stand in the way of your recovery. If you would drive through a snow store to buy booze, then you can drive through a snow storm to go to an AA meeting. Please, if you go to AA, don't just go to meetings and then say that the program didn't work for you. You will get out of any program what you put into it. Go to meetings, get a sponsor, read the Big Book, work the steps, follow the guidance given to you by those who have found a way to stay sober. You do not have to drink again, but you do have to take action if you want to recover.
Susan

TexasGuy

Made through day #4

quitter13

Congrats of day 4. Your story sounds similar in ways to mine. I just made it through day 8. Longest I've gone in a long time and I'm starting to feel good. Keep it up

2granddaughters

Excellent !!
There is good AA in San Antonio. Quite a few of my friends attended the AA conference there recently.
We have all been where you are, you can do it.

Bob R.

omegasupreme

Group 12 | Central Service Office of San Antonio

That's Group 12 at Club 12, where my sponsor sobered up 18 years ago. That is where I would start if I were in San Antonio.

If you would like I can see about getting you hooked up with some guys over there that should be able to get you started on a solid path to recovery...Private Message me for more details if you are interested.

Peace

Omega

NYCDoglvr

I drank because I'm an alcoholic. What worked for me is not drinking TODAY. That's all, it's just today. Can you get to bedtime? I'm sure you can.

I also suggest AA. I wouldn't be alive without AA. It's the support of other alcoholics that got -- and kept me sober. I couldn't get sober alone.