dawnie24

Back to day 1 of sobriety again - I feel like a failure, tomorrow I'm gonna go to my new GPs and ask for help from them. I can't keep living like this why can't I be someone different? Maybe I wouldn't be like this

scrambled2012

"Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely."
~ Henry Ford

Perhaps, dawnie, you're one of those mortal human beings we have all heard so much about? You are not alone; understanding that so many others have the same feelings, fears, and concerns as we ourselves do is an ironic basis for brotherhood, but its true.

Anna

You can be the person you want to be.

I'm glad you're talking to your dr, and I hope you keep reading and posting.

2granddaughters

dawnie, are you attending AA meetings in the UK ? Have a sponsor?
Wishing you the best.

Bob R. (in the colonies)

SparklingSeven

You're not a failure Dawnie. Sobriety is hard enough to get (and keep) even when you really want it. You didn't seem so sure in one of your previous posts?

I knew I had a problem at the age of 26, but I also felt like I was too young to stop, that I just wanted to relax and have a few beers at the end of a hard day. It never stopped at just a few beers though and sooner or later I would end up a bubbling mess again, asking myself how I let it happen again. I went through this process over and over again for the next 14 years. Maybe you don't need to suffer for as long as I did? I hope you get some help at the GPs.

If you haven't read it yet, please get yourself a copy of Under the Influence. It changed my life. Like others have said AA might also be worth a look.

Glad you made it back!

Stu.

dawnie24

Sometimes I find it so hard , tbh I don't even know why I drink I've ran out of making excuses to drink. I just go I'm havin drink tonight and its gone up from havin 8cans to 12

dawnie24

M
My old GP couldn't be bothered basically so I've had to change doctors bit I'm petrified if they will tell my social worker or somethin

dawnie24

Wish I knew were A A meetings where

SparklingSeven

Alcoholics Anonymous (A.A.) Great Britain

dawnie24

Thank you stu - its so hard to keep away from it I sometimes think am I always gonna be the binge drinker?
How do I keep away full stop

dawnie24

Thanx ill look at it now

NewBeginning010

HI Dawnie, Its tough not picking up that first drink but you can do it. I had to reach the point of being so sick & tired of being sick & tired that I knew I couldn't ever have a drink again, actually I didnt/dont want to (why would I want to feel sick like that again).

You can do this, one day, one hour or one minute at a time. Just don't pick up that first drink. Some face to face time working on your addiction with other alcoholics that are not drinking could be good for you too (AA etc.).

Can you admit your powerlessness over alcohol, do you truly want to give it up & improve your life for you and your children. Are you ready to do one of the toughest & most rewarding things you will do in your lifetime? Are you ready to give this fight everything you got to beat it? Because that is what it takes for some of us. If so please type it out to get the thought of doing it going.

This thing really is simple in the end Dawnie, just dont pick up a drink "Now" (in this moment). Just by doing this you will be sober for the rest of your life.

I have found that coming on here & reading books about recovery as well as many other tools have helped me along my path.

So day 1 it is.... it could be the first day of a lifetime of sobriety if you work on it & put everything you can into it.

All of the best on your recovery Dawnie ~ NB

Dee74

I agree with Anna, Dawnie - you can be the person you want to be

Change is possible for all of us...I used to be an all day everyday drinker for 5 years...I used to dream of being someone different...and now I am

I really believe you get out of your recovery what you put into it.

If you're prepared to give it everything you have, you'll be on the right road.

I believe you can do it - you owe it to yourself and your kids Dawnie.

D

dawnie24

Thank you - I am gonna try and not pick up that first drink coz I know it'll carry on ruining my life

I do wanna be sober for my kids coz they are my world - I think look at all them ppl that have died off alcohol do I really wanna be one of them no coz my children need their mother.

I've found an AA meeting but its just the place were it is. And at night its not a very good place to be

dawnie24

What would I do without yous - I really wanna believe I can do it to I'm actually happy I have no money coz that means I can't buy booze

scrambled2012

For the record dawnie, that isn't me in the picture, it's just something that sort of captures my identity (i can't PM etc yet not enough posts, thats why this msg is here).

thanks~~~

2granddaughters

"I've found an AA meeting but its just the place were it is. And at night its not a very good place to be"

That never stopped me from drinking there.
Here, the first number in our telephone book is AA, check your book there.
I will pray for you and your children.
Bob

TheOjibway84

As Chopper said. It can be hard at times to want to quit. Thats the issue of addiction. No matter how determined we are, sometimes it gets the best of us. That's why we have help. In these rooms and the rooms of AA.. I know how it feels though and it was a real struggle to pick up again because I beat myself down and my alcoholism was telling me... "Drink! You'll feel better, drunk!" And when I drank those feelings went away... temporarily. Once I sobered up again I felt like I didn't know where to go or who to be anymore. I made so many promises, had been through so many issues with family and jobs and friends that I nearly gave up life itself, I was prepared to live a drunk. But I knew it was impossible with my diabetes and all. So luckily my parents brought me back home after living on my own for 5 months. They brought me back under the safety of their wings in the family nest and I've been sober ever since August 2011. 5 months sober. I've relapsed so many times I didn't know how to show my parents I was dead serious this time. So I showed it by going to AA meetings, being pleasant around the house (I use to be grouchy alot!) Do chores, take the dogs for a walk (Which I love gives me time to think). They've been very proud of me so far because I have worked harder then ever to maintain my soberness. So truth be told, do what you can to stay sober and you'll reap the rewards of a goodlife once again. A life you've missed for many years. Good luck you can do it! You've done it before you can do it again but look more into yourself to figure out to do better this time around I did.

dawnie24

Lol thought so it looks like him outta matrix

dawnie24

Someone got murdered on same road few weeks back and there's lots of prostitutes at night and its like an hour away from my house