dawnie24

I regret drinkin and feel stupid for writin on here, atm I'm jus really worried I miss my family bein away in a different town makes me feel what stupid mistake I done. I'm gonna view another house next door to my bfs aunts which I will feel more secure there , esp when I been really down.. I don't know what social services will say bout me wantin to move again n how it'll look on cp coz of kids, the house next door to my bfs aunts is nice and there's a gate between houses so my children can go there when they plz I know my children would love it ... And this house I'm in now is fallin apart and I mean literally and I'm pretty scared of the woods behind my back garden I get paranoid a lot coz of it.. For last hour I've been feelin like I'm gonna go mad and try to do somethin stupid.

Why am I like this? I know its prob somethin to do with booze last night and my mind now wonderin and its stressin me out

For all ppl that wanted to know are children on child protection coz of alcohol, my children are on it coz of my other childrens father batterin me and me ringin police when I had a drink and him smokin weed

Dee74

I think most of us have 'after drink anxiety' Dawnie - I hope you feel better soon.

I'm glad you're back with us - I've read your posts for a long time - I really think not drinking might be best for you

D

BackToSquareOne

Hang in there Dawnie and be kind to yourself. Getting all bummed out over what's already done is pointless. Try to remember some of the happiest times in your life, if you take your mind there for a while it may cheer you up.

neferkamichael

Hi Dawnie. Every time I see a thread you start or a post you've made is just makes me stronger than I was the day before. Your talking and its important to keep talking. SR is a life line for me, and honest to god Dawnie, if I can stay sober you can to. You're still a youngster and you'd be better of in the long run if you stop using. KEEP POSTIN!

Sudz No More

No Sense in getting upset, we've all been there. You realize where you want to be and that is all that matters.

Threshold

I'm glad you're rethinkin, drinkin. But sorry you're having a rough day. Anxiety is a stinker. Looks like you are looking at some REAL solutions to address the causes, not just a way to escape the feeling.

We like having you are part of our recovery family.

ForeverDecember

Hey Dawnie, glad you're back on track today, not glad things aren't going so well though.

Are there any support agencies you can go to for some free counselling and advice? I wish I could help you out more.

dawnie24

Thank you dee, I wouldn't know what to do if I didn't hve this site its become a big part in my life which I never thought possible and jus coming on here knowing I have people to talk to lifts weight off my shoulders thank you

dawnie24

Happiest times in my life is my children bein born, me and my bf first gettin together, moving away from the worsed place that ruined my life

Hevyn

Hi dawnie. Please never regret coming here to talk about things, no matter what. We're here to listen and help if we can. We just want you to give yourself a chance to get healthy again so you can lead the best life possible.

dawnie24

Coz my phone keep messin up and runnin slow ill reply this way lol--

Michael - ill be on SR for long time to come coz on here I can open up and noone knows me and that's importnant coz tryin to talk to someone I know its hard apart from openin up to my bf and I cried and told him how I felt.

Sudz - I wanna be with my children and my bf and a house were I know someone close is gonna be there ... I'm a very emotional person and I'm kinda person to worry a lot and it sets me off into paranoia and anxiety

Threshold - alcohol is a real stinker I agree, but why does it ruin lifes

December - there's no support agencies round here that I know of but can always ask I supose.

Hevyn - believe me I never regret comin on here everyones supportive of me, even at my lowest, I can trust SR to help everytime

Sarah85

Dawnie I'm sorry you're having so much trouble with anxiety! That's been a tough thing in my quit too. Just know that it does get easier with each day you put between yourself and that last drink. Keep posting, sometimes venting is the best way to get things off your mind. And just keep thinking about those amazing kids that you're doing this all for.

KarrieJay

Dawnie, it's so good to see you back here posting. I was quite worried about you when I read you thread yesterday.

Don't beat yourself up about have had a drink. We've all done it. As they stay, quitting is easy. It's staying quit that's hard.

Keep strong. I hope you get your house.

SteppingItUp

Hi Dawnie, I have been following your posts, and although my heart goes out to you and understands the power of alcoholic delusion, from any other point of view there just could be no way to deny any longer that you have a serious problem. Being a mother of small children with another on the way, it is beyond time to grow up and take responsibility. Don't know how to do that? That's okay, I didn't either. The solution that has worked for me has been through the 12 steps of AA. I throughly believe that we are not responsible for our illness, but we are responsible for our recovery. My experience is that moving house wasn't nearly enough of a solution when faced with the power of alcoholism in me. There is a lot I did that was just as akin to rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. If you are willing to do the work required to get well, then the resources are 100% available to you, and there are no excuses left. If you are seeing that what you have been doing clearly hasn't worked because you have gone back once more to the insanity of drinking again, and you actively choose not to work a program of recovery, then I pray to God for the sake of your unborn baby and your other innocent children. This is no longer all about you. I mean this with love, but I truly believe a reality check is really in order. I sincerely hope you get it. Prayers, SIU

dawnie24

Hi sarah, I keep thinkin of my kids no matter what if it weren't for them I wouldn't of been here today. I rememeber each day gets better and anxiety will prob go away again

dawnie24

That's prob the hardest part is not giving in to alcohol when I give in to drink I feel like a weaklin

dawnie24

I found out I wasn't preg in the end which is a very good thing, sometimes I don't understand myself on why I need to drink its jus a disease that is killin me slowly, I need to do what I did last time n STAY sober keep my mind occupied take kids places they never been