30 Days...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 16
30 Days...
December 6th, 2011 was my first day sober. Since then I've had to deal with some pretty intense and scary physical and emotional issues. I've had the stress of dealing with the holidays sober and on Sunday I'll turn 30 and fully expect to remain sober.
For the last 30 days I've lived in my house with 9 beers in the fridge and a cabinet full of liquor without even the slightest urge to drink any of it.
Deep down, in the deepest reaches of my soul I know I'm better off for being sober. However, I'm emotionally a wreck, dealing with both depression and anxiety. The medications help to a degree but I'm more numb than anything.
I continue to push on though. I will always continue to push through. My wife and children need me as much as I need them and I know without them I'd surely be dead, dying or trying to die.
I live with the hope that someday soon it will all be better. That I'll be able to undo the physiological damage I've done with alcohol. That my efforts in therapy and thinking will show positive results and that I'll be able to live, happily without medications as a good father, good husband and healthy human being.
Hope is all I have some days. Today is one of those days...
For the last 30 days I've lived in my house with 9 beers in the fridge and a cabinet full of liquor without even the slightest urge to drink any of it.
Deep down, in the deepest reaches of my soul I know I'm better off for being sober. However, I'm emotionally a wreck, dealing with both depression and anxiety. The medications help to a degree but I'm more numb than anything.
I continue to push on though. I will always continue to push through. My wife and children need me as much as I need them and I know without them I'd surely be dead, dying or trying to die.
I live with the hope that someday soon it will all be better. That I'll be able to undo the physiological damage I've done with alcohol. That my efforts in therapy and thinking will show positive results and that I'll be able to live, happily without medications as a good father, good husband and healthy human being.
Hope is all I have some days. Today is one of those days...
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 2
Hello V,
I'm sitting here feeling proper fed up, craving a drink massively, and reading the posts on here, to busy my mind and my fingers. I just wanted to say that reading your post, has helped lift me.
It's actually quite uncanny, for my quit date was the 2nd December, and its my birthday - the week after yours !
I too, am suffering terrible anxiety, and wondering when this will ease. I think the hardest part for me in staying sober, is when I can't see any benefits - feel shite, cant sleep, have zero patience, and am full of self pity, cuz I can't do what normal people can do. I know tho, that I am NOT going to drink tonight.
It's just nice to know, that there is someone else out there, at around the same stage as me and who feels the same as me.
Let's try and get thru this together.
x
I'm sitting here feeling proper fed up, craving a drink massively, and reading the posts on here, to busy my mind and my fingers. I just wanted to say that reading your post, has helped lift me.
It's actually quite uncanny, for my quit date was the 2nd December, and its my birthday - the week after yours !
I too, am suffering terrible anxiety, and wondering when this will ease. I think the hardest part for me in staying sober, is when I can't see any benefits - feel shite, cant sleep, have zero patience, and am full of self pity, cuz I can't do what normal people can do. I know tho, that I am NOT going to drink tonight.
It's just nice to know, that there is someone else out there, at around the same stage as me and who feels the same as me.
Let's try and get thru this together.
x
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 482
Originally Posted by Viginti 
For the last 30 days I've lived in my house with 9 beers in the fridge and a cabinet full of liquor without even the slightest urge to drink any of it.
I would be getting rid of all that booze though. It's just mean to keep it around. Tip out the lot of it, or give the liquor to a friend or family member. No reason to torture yourself!
Sally1009
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 467
Congrats on your 30 days. I would pour the drink down the sink though, because there is always the f***it factor. It's happened to me too many times to take the risk in early sobriety.
You are being very brave, and clearly a loving husband and father. Good luck on your journey.
You are being very brave, and clearly a loving husband and father. Good luck on your journey.
Sally1009
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 467
Congrats on your 30 days. I would pour the drink down the sink though, because there is always the f***it factor. It's happened to me too many times to take the risk in early sobriety.
You are being very brave, and clearly a loving husband and father. Good luck on your journey.
You are being very brave, and clearly a loving husband and father. Good luck on your journey.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 16
Thank you all for the kind words. As for the suggestions of pouring the unused booze down the drain...
I have all intention of giving the beers away. The liquor has never been my drink of choice, could never stand to drink it so it's not even on my mind to be honest.
The other thing helping to keep me on the straight and narrow is fear. I've been having panic attacks, anxiety and depression since stopping drinking. I have a very real fear of drinking again. I know if I do I may feel better short term but once I come down from it my depression and anxiety will be 10 fold or more and I honestly don't believe I could handle that.. Additionally the meds prescribed to me by my doctor for my panic/depression don't mix well with alcohol and I definitely don't wish to tempt fate with that.
Most simply wouldn't or couldn't live in the house with the alcohol and I get that but for me it's simply not an issue at this time and should it become one the booze will be gone.
I have all intention of giving the beers away. The liquor has never been my drink of choice, could never stand to drink it so it's not even on my mind to be honest.
The other thing helping to keep me on the straight and narrow is fear. I've been having panic attacks, anxiety and depression since stopping drinking. I have a very real fear of drinking again. I know if I do I may feel better short term but once I come down from it my depression and anxiety will be 10 fold or more and I honestly don't believe I could handle that.. Additionally the meds prescribed to me by my doctor for my panic/depression don't mix well with alcohol and I definitely don't wish to tempt fate with that.
Most simply wouldn't or couldn't live in the house with the alcohol and I get that but for me it's simply not an issue at this time and should it become one the booze will be gone.
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