Higher Power and porn
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 137
Higher Power and porn
Hello Everybody,
In my recovery, I have occasionally looked at pornography to satisfy lustful urges. My life is not consumed with thoughts of lust towards woman, but I feel there is something "wrong" about it.
It is my understanding that the church frowns about upon looking on pornography, but I am not a Christian and choose not to follow Christianity. After I watch a pornography, I feel that it releases some stress, but brings additional stress because
My main concern is the concept of that people in recovery should engage in pure thoughts and not have lustful thoughts towards the opposite sex. It does not matter whether Christianity is the true religion, but rather that lust as a lustful thoughts cuts us out with making conscious contact with our high power.
The question is that whether I should treat pornography and lust in general, like the church does and call it sin or immoral even though I do not believe in Christianity. Should I try to obtain to purity of the soul in order for me to remain sober?
Or is looking for pornography on occassion is okay as long you do not develop an addiction about it?
In my recovery, I have occasionally looked at pornography to satisfy lustful urges. My life is not consumed with thoughts of lust towards woman, but I feel there is something "wrong" about it.
It is my understanding that the church frowns about upon looking on pornography, but I am not a Christian and choose not to follow Christianity. After I watch a pornography, I feel that it releases some stress, but brings additional stress because
My main concern is the concept of that people in recovery should engage in pure thoughts and not have lustful thoughts towards the opposite sex. It does not matter whether Christianity is the true religion, but rather that lust as a lustful thoughts cuts us out with making conscious contact with our high power.
The question is that whether I should treat pornography and lust in general, like the church does and call it sin or immoral even though I do not believe in Christianity. Should I try to obtain to purity of the soul in order for me to remain sober?
Or is looking for pornography on occassion is okay as long you do not develop an addiction about it?
Last edited by Dee74; 01-01-2012 at 02:18 PM. Reason: fixed title typo
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Midwest
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In my opinion, masturbation is not only perfectly fine and normal, but also healthy. I think this is particularly applicable to folks who are relatively new to sobriety (such as myself), because there is no way I could handle a sexual relationship with another person right now.
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Join Date: Sep 2010
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Originally Posted by crisco 
My main concern is the concept of that people in recovery should engage in pure thoughts and not have lustful thoughts towards the opposite sex. It does not matter whether Christianity is the true religion, but rather that lust as a lustful thoughts cuts us out with making conscious contact with our high power.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
This is a complex issue, at least I believe that it is.
Pornography is harmful if it diverts you away from the one you love. All that energy being displaced to a computer screen. If you are not in a relationship then it could divert you from putting your energy to find that special person. Sex is awesome. It can be wholesome. It can also corrupt.
It is really between you and your higher power. I don't believe that there are no victims in hard core porn. It's just unclear to me who they are... The viewer? The exploited? The significant other?
Porn has it's place and can be an exciting part of one's sex life. But it can isolate the viewer if done alone and to excess.
Well that is my opinion.
Pornography is harmful if it diverts you away from the one you love. All that energy being displaced to a computer screen. If you are not in a relationship then it could divert you from putting your energy to find that special person. Sex is awesome. It can be wholesome. It can also corrupt.
It is really between you and your higher power. I don't believe that there are no victims in hard core porn. It's just unclear to me who they are... The viewer? The exploited? The significant other?
Porn has it's place and can be an exciting part of one's sex life. But it can isolate the viewer if done alone and to excess.
Well that is my opinion.
Guest
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 57
Originally Posted by crisco
My main concern is the concept of that people in recovery should engage in pure thoughts and not have lustful thoughts towards the opposite sex.
Stop and think about what you wrote for a moment. Having lustful thoughts towards the opposite sex (if you're hetero) is a normal part of the human condition. I could be married to Brad Pitt but I would still think or fantasize with being with other men. Now, notice that fantasies are NOT actions. They are just thoughts. I don't have to act on my impulses.
When you are in recovery, you WILL at times think/fantasize of drinking now
and again. This is normal for someone working toward sobriety. However, it's what you do with your thoughts is what matters. YOUR THOUGHTS ARE NOT YOUR ACTIONS.
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
Porn is bad for me. I never go away feeling good or even OK. I know it is an issue for me, because it does "get me off", but I get a spiritual and emotional hangover for it. The consequences are NOT good.
I do need to "get off" sometimes, but I can do it in ways that don't involve porn, or unhealthy fantasies, etc, and if I do that, I find I feel ok, tension relieved, no guilt, no sense of self disgust...
Feeling good is not a problem, it's the things I do to make myself feel good that can be a problem. I need to put healthy things into my mind and body in order to get a healthy outcome.
If porn compromises your integrity, or leaves you feeling yucky...I'd stay away from it.
I do need to "get off" sometimes, but I can do it in ways that don't involve porn, or unhealthy fantasies, etc, and if I do that, I find I feel ok, tension relieved, no guilt, no sense of self disgust...
Feeling good is not a problem, it's the things I do to make myself feel good that can be a problem. I need to put healthy things into my mind and body in order to get a healthy outcome.
If porn compromises your integrity, or leaves you feeling yucky...I'd stay away from it.
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Personally I take a very prudish view on porn, I don't even like novels that get too explicit (even the scene in the time traveller's wife was distasteful to me).
That being said, I think porn/masturbation is a natural, healthy part of life for most men, and a lot of women too. Sex, also, is a healthy, natural part of life, as are the "lustful" thoughts you've mentioned. I don't think you should feel ashamed for it, it's just a natural thing. Even animals do it, and they don't feel ashamed!
That being said, I think porn/masturbation is a natural, healthy part of life for most men, and a lot of women too. Sex, also, is a healthy, natural part of life, as are the "lustful" thoughts you've mentioned. I don't think you should feel ashamed for it, it's just a natural thing. Even animals do it, and they don't feel ashamed!
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 873
I think there are a couple of things at work here.
One is whether it's wrong to think about and want to watch sex and my personal view is that it's not wrong in any way, and it's completely human nature to gravitate in that direction. Now there are some elements to porn that are (imo) disgusting and degrading but you don't have to watch that. But I wouldn't beat myself up over something so natural.
The second thing is (and there are different views on this) that you might want to think about your priorities. Substance abuse can be the cause, the symptom, the consequences of lots of other problems and if it were me I'd ask myself whether I wanted to tackle all of my vices at once or deal with the most important ones first. Suppose you decide that you really want to eliminate porn from your life. Think about whether that has to come in conjunction with quitting drinking, or whether it's better to deal with one thing at a time.
One is whether it's wrong to think about and want to watch sex and my personal view is that it's not wrong in any way, and it's completely human nature to gravitate in that direction. Now there are some elements to porn that are (imo) disgusting and degrading but you don't have to watch that. But I wouldn't beat myself up over something so natural.
The second thing is (and there are different views on this) that you might want to think about your priorities. Substance abuse can be the cause, the symptom, the consequences of lots of other problems and if it were me I'd ask myself whether I wanted to tackle all of my vices at once or deal with the most important ones first. Suppose you decide that you really want to eliminate porn from your life. Think about whether that has to come in conjunction with quitting drinking, or whether it's better to deal with one thing at a time.
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