Recovery birthday dilemma... (AA)
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
by being an active member in the group, by participating in GSR and other related activities, by show up early and staying late to set up and clean up, by contributing cash over and above what I drink in coffee or eat in snacks, by volunteering for service work within the group, by managing the group website/online discussion forum and....for the first 2 I got, I paid the group cash for the coins (the last two were gifts from my sponsor, not the group).
I think, PD, had you thought about that, you wouldn't have had to ask but, as I predicted....many would react emotionally to what I wrote rather than taking the time to consider it.
I think, PD, had you thought about that, you wouldn't have had to ask but, as I predicted....many would react emotionally to what I wrote rather than taking the time to consider it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
Hudstar,
I say go get the chip. When I went to AA, I always loved seeing folks get their time in and take a chip. It was encouraging for me to see. I saw a woman get her 37th year chip! That really impressed me!
You know you can get a cake too, right? Here, we bring our own cakes to share at the break. I think out here there's a tradition of putting a dollar in the basket for each year too beside whatever one might usually kick in.
Anyway, congrats to you!
Love from Lenina
I say go get the chip. When I went to AA, I always loved seeing folks get their time in and take a chip. It was encouraging for me to see. I saw a woman get her 37th year chip! That really impressed me!
You know you can get a cake too, right? Here, we bring our own cakes to share at the break. I think out here there's a tradition of putting a dollar in the basket for each year too beside whatever one might usually kick in.
Anyway, congrats to you!
Love from Lenina
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 36
I had this happen too. I was attending AA a couple of times a month when my one-year came up. I didn't have a sponsor and I wasn't working the steps, but I enjoyed being there and I talked to people, helped stack chairs and basked in the environment. I approached one of the elder group members and told him - and I sincerely meant this - that I didn't want any attention. I hadn't committed to the program in a structured way and I didn't feel like I deserved it. I just wanted the one-year chip.
There was no having that. They were giving me a party. "It's not for you," he said. "It's for everyone else in this room who needs inspiration." When he phrased it like that, I agreed.
I shared the anniversary with someone who was celebrating 10 years. Everyone knew and loved the other person, had her over for regular meals, carpooled with her, etc. Everyone got up and said wonderful things about her. When it got to me, all they said was "Welcome to AA" (even though these were people I'd talked to several times over the year) and that they didn't see me very often. Another member sitting next to me whispered a joke to me - "This is like a roast!" I faked a big smile, but it was actually really painful and I haven't gone back since. A couple of months later, one of the group members called and left me a voicemail saying they hadn't seen me. I pondered calling her back and telling her how I felt but I didn't.
What I did hear from everyone, though, is that you don't have to be a regular AA attendee to get a chip. It was great to commemorate it with an actual event, and a chip in your hand. It was still an important thing for me to do. If you want to do it, I encourage you to do it. Like my counsellor said once, "How do they know how many other meetings you go to?" And most of all, congrats on your one year!
There was no having that. They were giving me a party. "It's not for you," he said. "It's for everyone else in this room who needs inspiration." When he phrased it like that, I agreed.
I shared the anniversary with someone who was celebrating 10 years. Everyone knew and loved the other person, had her over for regular meals, carpooled with her, etc. Everyone got up and said wonderful things about her. When it got to me, all they said was "Welcome to AA" (even though these were people I'd talked to several times over the year) and that they didn't see me very often. Another member sitting next to me whispered a joke to me - "This is like a roast!" I faked a big smile, but it was actually really painful and I haven't gone back since. A couple of months later, one of the group members called and left me a voicemail saying they hadn't seen me. I pondered calling her back and telling her how I felt but I didn't.
What I did hear from everyone, though, is that you don't have to be a regular AA attendee to get a chip. It was great to commemorate it with an actual event, and a chip in your hand. It was still an important thing for me to do. If you want to do it, I encourage you to do it. Like my counsellor said once, "How do they know how many other meetings you go to?" And most of all, congrats on your one year!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Surrey, UK
Posts: 99
Thanks to all for your thoughts.
Whether I go or not to a meeting for my chip or not, I've decided to commemorate my 1 year with an engraved ring. It will simply read: "One". As in 'one year sober', 'one month/day/minute/second at a time', 'one drink and I'm back in hell again', 'One moment to live in', 'One life, live it well'; whatever I need it to mean at the time.
That said, in the spirit of some of your responses I think I will go to the meeting because I remember earlier in the year seeing other people receive their one year chips and thinking "Damn, maybe I can do this too...".
Whether I go or not to a meeting for my chip or not, I've decided to commemorate my 1 year with an engraved ring. It will simply read: "One". As in 'one year sober', 'one month/day/minute/second at a time', 'one drink and I'm back in hell again', 'One moment to live in', 'One life, live it well'; whatever I need it to mean at the time.
That said, in the spirit of some of your responses I think I will go to the meeting because I remember earlier in the year seeing other people receive their one year chips and thinking "Damn, maybe I can do this too...".
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Surrey, UK
Posts: 99
Originally Posted by soberlicious 
Hudstar...love the "one" ring! What a great idea.
and for the record, I like to literally "mark" occasions lol...get a tat
and for the record, I like to literally "mark" occasions lol...get a tat
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
I have several, but the 2 "recoveryish" ones are "to thine own self be true" across my back and a wrist band with some devanagari script (love, freedom, peace, balance, compassion). The rest have to do with my kids, family, etc.
It seems to me another member, soberjennie, had a beautiful bracelet made that was significant to her recovery. I think there are pics in the secular section? That's also another cool idea (like the "one" ring)
It seems to me another member, soberjennie, had a beautiful bracelet made that was significant to her recovery. I think there are pics in the secular section? That's also another cool idea (like the "one" ring)
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 705
Originally Posted by sugarbear1
Just don't tat your sober date...a friend did that, then went back out.
He was not the brightest bulb I must say.
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