Why is sober date, time sober, etc., an accomplishment?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Tacoma, WA
Posts: 57
TU I guess you are one that has all the answers. For myself I have been around long enough to no the real sobriety is know as honest recovery and faked sobriety is known as a dry-drunk they might be sober but they are miserable and it is only a matter of time before they start drinking again. But who knows maybe I've got it all wrong!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Tacoma, WA
Posts: 57
Don't fool yourself
Originally Posted by soberlicious 
This is huge! Not just in staying sober, but in all of life. I believe the false/harmful beliefs we hold as truths are huge hindrances to growth. For me it's worth questioning the beliefs I hold, because they drive my behavior. When a behavior is problematic for me...it is based on a pernicious belief. Luckily I can change that.
LOL "pernicious" rhymes with "soberlicious"...but I am NOT pernicious
LOL "pernicious" rhymes with "soberlicious"...but I am NOT pernicious
Originally Posted by Beebizzy
I've been thinking about this too. Wondering exactly the same thing. What occurs to me is that even asking myself the question is a red flag. Not in the sense that I want to drink again, but more in the sense that either I've quit or I haven't. Not sure if that makes sense :-)
Also, the way to find it out involves taking a HUGE risk. The experience of others tells me that that risk hardly ever pays off. I'm not sure I'm willing to take that risk just to find out if I can drink alcohol moderately. I am more and more thinking 'why would I want to drink it anyway?', you know?
Although I only have 4 weeks sober, I am loving it. I drank to get drunk - I enjoy not drinking or being drunk (and all that goes with it) - so why would I re-introduce alcohol at a later stage for a HUGE risk I'm not willing to take, and for the possible, but unlikely, pay-off of one glass of wine with dinner here and there? Food tastes good anyway.
I know we are not here to discuss moderation and I don't want to go off topic, but this post struck me and I think these are valid questions in the context of a thread about day-counting (ie. I have x days, therefore I am 'cured', therefore I can drink a bit again).
BB
Also, the way to find it out involves taking a HUGE risk. The experience of others tells me that that risk hardly ever pays off. I'm not sure I'm willing to take that risk just to find out if I can drink alcohol moderately. I am more and more thinking 'why would I want to drink it anyway?', you know?
Although I only have 4 weeks sober, I am loving it. I drank to get drunk - I enjoy not drinking or being drunk (and all that goes with it) - so why would I re-introduce alcohol at a later stage for a HUGE risk I'm not willing to take, and for the possible, but unlikely, pay-off of one glass of wine with dinner here and there? Food tastes good anyway.
I know we are not here to discuss moderation and I don't want to go off topic, but this post struck me and I think these are valid questions in the context of a thread about day-counting (ie. I have x days, therefore I am 'cured', therefore I can drink a bit again).
BB
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Tacoma, WA
Posts: 57
Originally Posted by BackToSquareOne
Your right Beebizzy from Brusles, Belgium (a lot of B's going on there), it would be a bad idea to experiment with it. I just visualize all of the alcohol withdrawal nonsense that each bender ends in and I have no desire to ever put myself through that again. I'm not really sure if one night out on the town would end in a bender of epic proportions or if I'd just be able to stop like Supercrew mentioned in his post, probably best not to tempt fate though.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Tacoma, WA
Posts: 57
I don't want anyone to take this wrong but we are never cured we are only blessed with the blessing of remission if we maintain abstinence and work on a life of recovery "believe it or not that means that you actually enjoy being sober in your daily activities". What a concept!!
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
Posts: 5,273
Originally Posted by lilotto
we are never cured we are only blessed with the blessing of remission if we maintain abstinence and work on a life of recovery
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Tacoma, WA
Posts: 57
Hudstar; I couldn't have put it better. When you quit enjoying life you no it's time to find new things to do. For me I have made trips to the park, beach, and museums. I am now going to go bowling as that was something as a kid I always enjoyed. So slowly life is really getting to be exciting.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Tacoma, WA
Posts: 57
Originally Posted by soberlicious
First, thanks lilotto, for your kind words in your earlier posts. Secondly, I'm going to respectfully disagree with your above statement. The words "cured" and "remission" surround the disease model of addiction, which not everyone subscribes to. That said, for me, my life has never been better and that is the direct result of not drinking alcohol. ever. Another member put it beautifully when they said that "recovery" just means living life well and happy.
PS I wasn't aware that I used the term cured, remission yes but not cured. Correct me any time!
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
I now view my alcoholic past as a time that I spent in a prison, trapped by the illusions afforded me by a substance that destroys you while convincing you that there is no pleasure or meaning in life without it.
There is no hardship or privation for me in remaining sober. In fact, sobriety has no downside; any perceived benefit that comes from alcohol is a con and a lie. If I look at my sobriety this way, it makes more sense to talk about how long I was in prison and drinking, instead of how long I have been out of prison and sober.
There is no hardship or privation for me in remaining sober. In fact, sobriety has no downside; any perceived benefit that comes from alcohol is a con and a lie. If I look at my sobriety this way, it makes more sense to talk about how long I was in prison and drinking, instead of how long I have been out of prison and sober.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
Posts: 3,680
Originally Posted by lilotto
TU I guess you are one that has all the answers. For myself I have been around long enough to no the real sobriety is know as honest recovery and faked sobriety is known as a dry-drunk they might be sober but they are miserable and it is only a matter of time before they start drinking again. But who knows maybe I've got it all wrong!
Are you going to drink/use again in this lifetime, or are you not?
I got nothin'
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: My house.
Posts: 4,890
A dry drunk is a drunk who remembered to bring an umbrella for the rain. A wet drunk obviously didn't care enough to plan ahead.
That sobriety brings peace, happiness, tons of money, etc. is an illusion. There is nothing wrong if a person is miserable sober. I've been there many times. I'm also dealing with depression. The idea of 'if you're not happy you're doing it wrong' is very discouraging to a lot of people.
As to the OP, sometimes my sobriety is the only accomplishment I have to hang on to. There's nothing wrong in setting goals and being proud of yourself for reaching those goals.
That sobriety brings peace, happiness, tons of money, etc. is an illusion. There is nothing wrong if a person is miserable sober. I've been there many times. I'm also dealing with depression. The idea of 'if you're not happy you're doing it wrong' is very discouraging to a lot of people.
As to the OP, sometimes my sobriety is the only accomplishment I have to hang on to. There's nothing wrong in setting goals and being proud of yourself for reaching those goals.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Instead of these broad sweepting generalizations of what others
should ..would could.. do in regards to their recovery...
please do share your own expereinces if you have any. Put away your crystal ball...take off the halo.
:..
should ..would could.. do in regards to their recovery...
please do share your own expereinces if you have any. Put away your crystal ball...take off the halo.
:..
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
