I'm scared of becoming an alcoholic
Late stage optimist
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Auburn, WA
Posts: 306
Hi, Tetras2:
I did the same thing you did. However, I ran into a cyclical use pattern no matter what my intentions were as far as stopping. And I was addicted to nicotine too, like you. When I entered college, I entered a new phase of alcohol use. Different environment. The alcoholism morphed into a different form. When I graduated from college, it morphed once again. When I went to graduate school, again it morphed.
Good luck staying off the stuff. Your concern is something you may want to get a few tools to deal with. Anxiety by itself drives a lot of alcohol use. College is a place where anxiety is a common friend to the student. There may be feelings you have such as anxiety that help fuel your alcohol use. Gaining an awareness of this, and finding tools to manage the feelings without using alcohol will help you stay out of the dark places many of us such as myself have plunged into while active in our alcoholism and/or drug addiction.
I completely concur with Sugarbear1. This disease is progressive whether you consume your drug of choice (here, alcohol) or not, and drinking is but one symptom of the disease. Someone can be abstinent from alcohol and still demonstrate behaviors that are hallmark characteristics of alcoholism.
I did the same thing you did. However, I ran into a cyclical use pattern no matter what my intentions were as far as stopping. And I was addicted to nicotine too, like you. When I entered college, I entered a new phase of alcohol use. Different environment. The alcoholism morphed into a different form. When I graduated from college, it morphed once again. When I went to graduate school, again it morphed.
Good luck staying off the stuff. Your concern is something you may want to get a few tools to deal with. Anxiety by itself drives a lot of alcohol use. College is a place where anxiety is a common friend to the student. There may be feelings you have such as anxiety that help fuel your alcohol use. Gaining an awareness of this, and finding tools to manage the feelings without using alcohol will help you stay out of the dark places many of us such as myself have plunged into while active in our alcoholism and/or drug addiction.
I completely concur with Sugarbear1. This disease is progressive whether you consume your drug of choice (here, alcohol) or not, and drinking is but one symptom of the disease. Someone can be abstinent from alcohol and still demonstrate behaviors that are hallmark characteristics of alcoholism.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: CA
Posts: 4
oh man... this totally spoke to me. i am not drinking everyday (but most) and always more than I plan. I can totally feel it changing and it's scary. and I don't want to be an alcoholic (like my dad) or crazy (like my mom) .... but lately I am feeling like I got the very worst of both of them. and I'm newly married (remarried actually) to awesome hubby... and I know he knows something is up. he seldom drinks. but I don't want him to know how I'm actually feeling. I don't want to say it out loud (but typing is ok? haha) but I can feel it headed that way...
Late stage optimist
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Auburn, WA
Posts: 306
Hi, gingo: If you can find some alcoholics where you live to talk to, it may help you get some relief mentally. Just to meet with some people who are like you. Your husband probably knows more than you think.
Take a look on line for an AA meeting schedule for your area. Check out some open meetings (you don't have to be an alcoholic to attend those meetings). I don't know if you are an alcoholic, and even if I did, you have to come to believe it yourself before you will be able to get the help you need to get well. Listening to others live, talking about their own life in alcoholism, and about their family life, can be an eye opening experience.
Take a look on line for an AA meeting schedule for your area. Check out some open meetings (you don't have to be an alcoholic to attend those meetings). I don't know if you are an alcoholic, and even if I did, you have to come to believe it yourself before you will be able to get the help you need to get well. Listening to others live, talking about their own life in alcoholism, and about their family life, can be an eye opening experience.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
gingo....welcome to our SR Alcoholism Forum...
I did read your earlier posts.....and with your on going health issues drinking is sure not going to be in your best interest.
It really is important to quit and stay that way. Please check with your doctor and be honest about your concerns.
All my best to you and your husband...
.
I did read your earlier posts.....and with your on going health issues drinking is sure not going to be in your best interest.
It really is important to quit and stay that way. Please check with your doctor and be honest about your concerns.
All my best to you and your husband...
.
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