JADIII

Hello, I've been browsing in the site for a couple of months to see if I had a "problem" or try to match my experiences to others. Long and short is that I do have a problem with alcohol and abusing it. I'm not a morning drinker or drink every day however when I do 80% of the time I'll have too much and either black out or pass out. I have a wife and kids and am realizing that little kids absorb much more info that you think so seeing me drink is not a great way of life.

So I sit here after going on a 3 day little blitz (Friday) being the worst and yesterday I just had 4 or 5 to prevent the inevitable hangover, which is here. I didnt sleep at all last night and just feel a haze over my entire body with no motivation to do anything at all. I've done this before and promised myself that I'd never feel like this again but here I am.

I mostly am a weekend drinker and am fine with drinking beer but when it gets to wine or hard liquor, I'm done. I want to stop drinking but can only usually make it from Sunday night to Friday at around 4 o'clock but I need to change that for health reasons, work reasons and much much more. I'm not into AA as I've already been there I just think that I need to work on some of my triggers as its straight downhill from there.

I know the changes I have to make, some new friends, new places to go and new hobbies but I always seem to go back to old tried and true. Just wondering what you've done out there that helps you make it through the day/week/months. I think I know but sometimes the smallest trigger can lead to a couple days of boozing.

Thanks

Beebizzy

Hello JADIII!

Welcome to SR!

I did exactly the same as you, for exactly the same reasons. Started reading on SR in Nov 2010 and finally quit in August 2011.

What made me finally quit for good was really, fully getting the impact of what alcohol was doing to me, and how it affected my life all the time, not just when I was consuming it. As you point out... That was in February - it took another 6 months before I quit. But when I did quit I was fully ready and committed (actually, I couldn't wait, I hated alcohol by then). This made it 'easier', I believe, than it could otherwise have been.

I was a very habit-driven, ritualistic, solo, every day drinker, and was expecting to be seriously antsy around the 'witching hour' and all evening. I wasn't. I put new habits in place immediately, mixed things up a bit, started walking in the park a bit and now, three weeks later, I feel already much better. I don't have new friends, places to go, or hobbies (yet :-)) - I started with the small stuff which, believe it or not, had fallen badly by the wayside - actually making dinner and doing the dishes afterwards - that sort of thing. Made me feel good too.

I was also accountable to a doctor and a counsellor - this helped immensely. I highly recommend a medical visit prior to quitting. And it was more than just accountability and medical safety - it was a way to formalise and 'break' the old routine. If it had been down to me only, I'd just have kept going.

I don't do AA either.

In any case, I hope I have been of some help - I can relate to a lot in your post, and you're right, it's not a way to live. Good luck to you moving forwards! (Keep reading and posting - it really does help you move to where you want to be).

BB

dawnrunner

Do some thinking about where and when you are most likely to drink. Then it is necessary to backtrack to where and when you start planning to drink.

For me, the planning was almost continuous. If drinking had been a military operation, I would have been a super tactician. Everything else revolved around my drinking time, which was much like BeeBizzy's: solitary, daily, safe at home planted on the couch where there is now a little indentation to remind me of all those hours. OK it is not so little.

I did need to put new habits in place quite deliberately, so I take my dogs for long walks - which they love!, and watch movies being able to actually remember the plot afterwards, and signed up for an evening yoga class, took a few cooking classes, etc.

As far as feeling lethargic and listless, you will be amazed at how great you feel after a completely sober week. I promise you! Your kids will be thrilled at their new super-dad.

Best wishes in putting alcohol behind you and a bright new future out in front!

CarolD

Please do read this link....it's from the book that finally convinced me to quit

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...influence.html

I had no idea that my body was no longer able to process alcohol correctly...:Wow!
Not all the info in the book applied to me but a lot sure did.

welcome to the posting side of SR...glad you are here....
Blessings to you and your family as you move into a healthy future

raindancer11

Welcome! I also came to this site wondering if I had a problem. I went back and forth for several years until one time something clicked and I just didn't want to be in that cycle anymore. I put all my energy into staying sober rather than figuring out how to have just one or two occasionally.

Keep reading and posting. There are several successful methods of stopping and staying stopped. But you have to really want it and be willing to not drink no matter what.

artsoul

Welcome JADIII -

We know what it's like to swear off drinking and be back at it without hours/days..... I'm glad you're reaching out for support.

We'll be around at 4:00 on Friday.