LifeBlows

Its Saturday and when my drinking career was really bad, I would get completely and utterly wrecked starting on Friday night all the way up until Monday morning. Put simply, weekends were for drinking. I don't know when this calcified into a belief but I do know that the fear of being sober over the weekend has stopped me from staying sober many many times.

I just didn't know what else to do with myself and for some reason I was willing to spend $100 or more a week on alcohol but was not willing to spend that money on any other activity. The money seemed less expensive spent on alcohol than spent at one time on something else.

I also spent hours and hours watching TV and surfing the internet. Over the last week that I have been sober, I have spent time away from home during the magic hour. i.e. from 9p.m. to 10p.m. I realized that when I am away from home and not watching TV I don't have cravings during that time. The cravings happen earlier in the day and are much shorter. Instead of having cravings for hours that peak just before the LCBO closes, I have cravings for about 1 hour from 7 to 8 or 8:30 and then its over.

Anyway I have been looking into volunteering options. I want to work maybe in the area of mental health of which there isn't much during the weekend. I think I would even like a volunteer shift that would go late into the night like till 2 a.m.

But I guess my days of watching TV for hours are over because that just seems to be really triggering for me. Anyway, now that I've realized how I view the weekends my craving has gone and I feel much more able to say no to drinking. I think that I will stay sober this weekend.

artsoul

It's great that you're having those insights..... I stopped playing video games when I got sober - they were just a time-filler which allowed me to drink and I think they made me anxious. I found out that I really enjoy doing things with my hands and have started making Christmas presents. It feels good to be productive again.

Thanks for the post, LifeBlows! Good to see you're doing well!

mikefreak

Sounds like you are on the right track......... How I remember the feeling of antcipation I would get mid-friday afternoon.

eJoshua

This sounds just like me. I hardly ever watch TV anymore and rarely surf the internet because I was the same way: I'd get plastered all weekend and waste my time. Eventually it got to the point where every weeknight was this way too.

It's great to see that you are thinking these things through. You are really setting yourself up for success!

I don't know if you are involved in AA, but going to meetings was a great way for me to fill up the time I used to waste.

NYCDoglvr

Bravo!! It's people, places and things that trigger relapses. It's important to change habits and it's a good idea to get out. How about getting a dog? Or, going to meetings on those nights?

LifeBlows

Ive actually thought about getting a dog but right now I'm having trouble feeding myself so that will have to wait. I have thought about AA too and I've been there before but sitting through meetings makes me really antsy. (i've got ADD and no money for medications right now.)