spryte

I am in the process of putting my medical work in to my employer - within one week. Then I go to rehab.

I feel like such a failure. But not really.

Everyone I know looks at me with such disappointment. But every professional I know tells me I'm doing the right thing. They are so consistent that I feel paranoid, like they are in cahoots with each other and they are plotting against me.

I don't know who to trust. I think maybe the people that "know me" don't know me that well. They don't know the stuff I get into, they don't know the way I (unessecarily) put myself through misery.

Thoughts?

spryte

Impurrfect

(((Spryte))) - glad you're going to rehab. I don't think the people who knew me, back then, ever had a clue as to what was going on in my head. It took me getting into recovery (addiction and codependency) for ME to even figure out who the real me was and what drove me to make some really bad decisions.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Dee74

Well, I definitely don't see this as a failure spryte - you're taking back the reins here...that's never a bad thing.

As for disappointed looks - like Amy said - noone really knows the full story but us - and you'll be surprised at how ephemeral people's memories can be

I'm really pleased to hear you've taken this step for yourself

D

iliveforyou

I am so glad that you've made the decision to go to rehab. I've been several times. Just make sure you pick up the tools they will give you and putting your recovery #1. Is it a 30 day?

I wish you luck

-Jess

spryte

Thank you all for replying.

Those replies meant a lot to me I read them carefully.

Jeff63

Congrats on rehab!

I went a little over 3 years ago and the things I learned were invaluable. It helped me to address the underlying causes of my addiction.

Keep in mind that you will only get out of it what you put in. Also, most likely you will be working somewhere else in a while anyways, so who cares what those people think.

Look at this as an opportunity to learn about yourself and be grateful you can do this. Many people cannot.

MaximaBella

I think its awesome!!!

mercurial me

Takes guts. You're doing the right thing. Anyone at your workplace who wants to talk about you behind your back should get a life of their own.

This thing is a disease, not a flaw or weakness in character

CarolD

I too am glad you are being pro active....

Opivotal

There are a lot of people who hide their problems. They suffer for a very long time out of fear, or any number of reasons. It takes a brave person to address their issues and deal with them. I commend you, on your decision to seek help. Who knows you better than yourself? I would hold my head up. Never be embarrassed or disappointed that you are getting your life in order. I wish you the best. Please keep us updated on your progress!





Best Wishes To You!

MycoolFitz

My best friend told me, when I was going to rehabb, that I didn't need to because I wasn't an alcoholic. Somethings professionals know better than best friends. And I definately knew better. What I did for me, not to please my friend or even to satisfy the pros. Trust yourself and my best to you and your decision.

sugarbear1

I am you and you are me. Insides are similar although our experiences are different.

It takes a strong person to do what you are doing. You will find many paradoxes along the way. Congratulations on your wise choice. And the paranoia does go away.