| yogaisland | 08-08-2011 03:58 PM |
Two Months Sober Today!
Today is two months since I gave up alcohol for good! I had been weaning myself down, but gave it up totally on 6/8.
It's weird, because I had a dream last night that I was at a wedding reception and the server was pouring everyone beers (which I never even drank) and I said, "Oh, not for me," but the server had already set one down in front of me. I thought, "well I have to drink it now, I cannot waste it," (a thought that got me in trouble many a times when my glass was refilled or someone bought me a shot I did not want "I can't waste it, it would be rude." But even in my dream I was committed to my sobriety, and called the server back over. "Could you please take this off my table?" I said. "I'm a recovering alcoholic." In the dream the server was very apologetic and took it away! I guess this reconfirms my faith that in the real world, if I refuse or even tell people I am an alcoholic, they are not going to get angry or disgusted with me, in fact they will probably apologize for offering!
I had a new volunteer at work that is doing court-ordered community service for a DUI. I didn't breach the subject but one of my little old ladies did (not knowing about the DUI or court order of course, just thinking this was a girl come to help just because). They were joking about vices because one old lady had said bread was her downfall and patted her stomach. The volunteer said she had many vices but bread wasn't one of them, and a different old lady said, "Oh, pray tell what are your vices?" The volunteer laughed and said, "chocolate first of all, and, ha ha, I do like to have a glass of wine every now and then." The old lady said, "I used to like that," and I said, "I did too; I had a very close relationship with the wine bottle. But we are seeing other people now!" I said it in a light hearted way, and everyone laughed. The volunteer said, "Oh well, I just drink every now and then" (might be true, DUI might be a one time mistake, I don't know her that well yet), and I reiterated that for me it was not every now and then, it was too much and so I put my foot down and stopped.
I know this sounds silly but this was a big thing for me to admit in public that I had a drinking problem (even if I did it in a lighthearted way.) I didn't even realize it was my two month anniversary at the time, I just felt like being open about it with someone that may or may not have a drinking problem herself. I know that if more people had been open to me, I may have realized "Hey, it's okay to NOT drink, not everyone does, here's someone who had a problem and stopped!"
Anyway, yay me :whoop | 