tooling

Ha! Can you believe this? This month will be a year sober for me. And today I had some really strong urges to get drunk. Thoughts passed through my head today making my life insignificant. Which then dissolved any good thoughts of my sobriety.

I feel like demons have made a return to try to get me to drink just so I miss the one year mark. So they can laugh at me or something.

Don't even think you are ever out of the water when you quit. Like they say you are only one drink away from being an alcoholic all over again.



Well I didn't drink and don't plan on it. But I was caught off guard today by the strong desire to drink,.

suki44883

Congratulations for recognizing it for what it is. I've been sober for a little over 3 years and I still get the occasional thought to drink. I won't do it, but like you say, we're never more than one drink away, so stay vigilant.

least

Glad you came out the victor.

SomethingBetter

Maybe its something in the air, Ive been off for about 4 days in a row, not worked or done nothing much exept wonder why I stay sober, without working I am going broke but I dont feel like being around people at the moment.

Like you I hang on to being sober, hoping these thoughts will pass, I'm 13 days from the 6 month mark and I really dont want to screw it all up.

Good for you for not drinking, as hard as it is, I know its the best thing.

MycoolFitz

Good for you. Maybe sometime we need these reminders as rotten as they seem?

Dee74

for some reasons anniversaries can be troublesome sometimes.
Glad you pulled through

D

LovesToTravel

I had trouble around the 1 year mark too. It is just another day. Congratulations to you! Hang in there.

sugarbear1

Give us new people hope! Don't cave in to those demons! 1 year is fabulous!

Tendencies

Congrats on 1 year. Fantastic. I'm struggling today. 8 months. I hope to be one year some day.

Terminally Unique

Such thoughts are only dangerous if you are not aware of them. If you take notice of them and recognize them for what they are - a lie - they will fall silent.

tooling

Thanks everyone. I'm very thankful to be around people here that acknowledge the bad in alcohol. It's what keeps us all strong and on the same page. It's the common denominator of us all.

gibson3479

maybe anniversaries are a goal and once we clear it we think we have made it clear..let it pass.....I have decided to no longer count for that reason,.....when I do...I make it a week and want to celebrate...guess how???? Just be happy you have made it this far and think about all the other days youve fought through....

bcboy

Right on for almost a year Tooling!

Think how strong you are to beat that voice to a pulp by not drinking.

That little beast in your head is dieing and this is one last attempt to try
to get a last breath before the end.

the force is strong in you

yor5150

you may want to consider celebrating your year by going out of your way to do something nice for someone else and don't tell anyone about it.

anything of a positive nature to get out of your head...

if you have to, make your year to spite the demons...

gravity

I'm a firm believer in getting help for alcoholism. I am an AA member and I went to counselling for a couple of years (he declared me sane and didn't want to see me anymore. lol).

Lasting sobriety requires a change in the way you think. It's about seeing through the BS and accepting reality. 1) I am an alcoholic and cannot drink - period. 2) My life was hell when I was drinking and I will return to that hell if I drink again.

In counselling, I was told that the one year mark is significant in terms of being able to get through the usual annual drinking events sober. I also read somewhere that it takes the brain a year to re-wire itself.

I don't really look at it as demons but rather as those old delusions creeping back in my head. Happens very rarely now and I recognize them for what they are.

Congrats on the sober time! It gets better.

Hudstar

Thanks for this and well done. My 1 year will be up in a couple of months and to be honest I'm apprehensive. The 'demon' analogy is fitting as I believe mine (that is, my alcoholic thinking) are just priming for an assault on me as I make a year, ready to bombard me with alcoholic nonsense like "You proved you can handle life with alcohol again", "You deserve it", "Have a drink, if it gets bad you can always quit again", etc.

All we can do is be real with ourselves. The lie is always more enticing than the truth, but the lie will indisputably lead to madness, sorrow and shame while the truth will keep us moving forward to undiscovered joys and meaning.

Walking with you, Tooling. :-)

tooling

Nice. Make a post. I'll be there to celebrate with you once you hit it.

Thanks

switchboard

I recently had my one year sober anniversary. In the couple of weeks preceeding the date, I had a few thoughts of "maybe" ... maybe one glass if I go out with friends ... or .. since I don't crave it anymore, maybe I am "cured" and can handle a couple of drinks.

I found once I passed the one-year mark, most of those thoughts went away for me. Fortunately, I don't actually crave it .. but I have a feeling that if I had one, I'd start craving. I've worked hard on a sober life, and I'm not chancing ruining it. It's soooooo not worth the risk!

Hopefully once you've passed your one-year anniversary date and gone a couple of days farther, it won't feel like an issue for you either.

Congrats on your sobriety!