MaryAnn100

Hi,

I feel my problems are so unique that there is no hope for me. Just wondering if this is unique?

Annette

CarolD

Everyone is special.....
that is what I try to remember when I share with them.

Good to see you again...

Boleo

"Psychologically we are all different but spiritually we are all the same."

- Carl Gustav Jung

Dee74

good to see you again Annette

I felt my problems were pretty unique too - noone else lived my life - disabled man, uni degrees, professional musician, history of abuse....my drinking and drugging was 'understandable'.

I used to think I was beyond help because noone could ever know what I went through.
Then I nearly died. That changed my perception completely.

I came here and I found understanding...and more to that I found something to identify with and take away with me in every story I heard or read...

I realised I wasn't as unique as I thought. I realised people may not have lived my life - but they have suffered from addiction...and I can learn from them, if I want

I had to 'get out of my own way' tho

D

Zencat

I believe it is possible to recover no matter how different a person may be from others.

Soberpotamus

Hi MaryAnn, my personal opinion is that it's critically important YOU find a way to know that there's hope for you. No matter how different you think you are... of course we're all different... even down to our neurochemistry and even metabolically, the way we process food. Genetically, we're all unique snowflakes.

But it's important you figure out that you can change. Once you grab onto that... knowing that is is possible and that it is likely that you can change things... well, there's no stopping you at that point. Change must start with the seed of an idea that it's possible

And don't let anyone tell you otherwise

LosingmyMisery

I think as alcoholics, we are not unique. We are very much alike in our thoughts and behaviors and why we drink. I too thought I was unique, but the longer I hung around alcoholics, like myself, I was not unique and not alone. I can relate to your feelings. I thought I was hopeless, but was wrong. Work on a plan of recovery and give yourself a chance at changing your life and living sober. There is a solution...and I found it. So can you.

sugarbear1

Try listening to aa spekers online. The audience laughs cause they relate to what is said. Or read the story section here.

Welcome!

Terminally Unique

Not, this is not unique. It is where the expression on my avatar comes from. Addicted people - and I did it myself too - will often use circumstances, and their own "special" problems, as a justification for continuing the addiction. Addiction affects your perception negatively, however, and makes molehills look like mountains, impossible to climb. I think you will find, though, that if you quit, many of your problems will become far more manageable.

What is your current plan?

Mavis1

Hi there Maryanne, oh I felt the same way, no one had the problems that I had, I used to say to myself when I was drunk "if you had my problems, you'd drink too" and when I sat down front at an AA meeting and met others, I learned that it is not the exact same problems but as we identify with others we stop feeling unique and we start fitting in and belonging and understanding that we are just like everyone else there and it feels so damn good you eventually become happy and forget all about your "terminal uniqueness" as they used to say to me. you be good to yourself, go to a meeting...talk to other drunks, best people in the world when they are in recovery....m

Opivotal

I sure felt unique when I was drinking. I was so happy when I joined SR and found out I wasn't. Addiction is addiction..same for everyone IMO. We can and do conquer it everyday. Sure our circumstances are different, but recovery starts with putting the alcohol away for good. We just can't manage it. So, hang in there and keep trying. Maybe change up the way you are doing things, change your support, just find a plan that works for you. Never give up!


Best Wishes To You!

tomdecel

I'm an optimist..... I don't dwell on my problems. I focus my energy on my limitless possibilities.

kiki5711

I don't understand? What is unique about you or your situation?

laurie6781

I do believe, that if you start sharing some of those 'unique' problems, you will find folks responding who have gone through the same things and then 'your problems' will not seem so unique.

Please be a bit more specific so that we can share how we felt the same way until we found others who had gone through what we were going through.

Love and hugs,

Mark75

Friendly chuckle.....

No, it's not unique to think we are unique.... It is a very common amongst us who have substance and alcohol abuse/addiction issue... That we are unique.

"If only you had my life you'd drink too!!"

Stick around, you'll hear your own story at least once, if not over and over! Thinking we are unique getsin the way of our recovery.... Notice AVRT's avatar... It says "terminally unique"... For that reason, we can think we are so unique and beyond help until we become terminal...

Welcome to SR

Latte

I had an old timer tell me to look at the similarities rather than the differences. It opened my eyes in the beginning and then as I had more time sober it helped me start a new life.

I'm glad you're back.

Itchy

Good question Annette.

Something many may need to hear discussed, but won't bring up. The answer is usually used as a joke, but with alcoholics I think it is a major hurdle to overcome that feeling that we are the only one with it as bad/hard/painful/lonely/abandoned/trapped/uncommitted etc.

The answer is: Sure you're unique, just like everybody else.

We all did the same things over and over and failed until we didn't and didn't.

Not one of us could be unique because all of us got addicted to our DOC which was ethanol for me and for you.

sugarbear1

I listen to others speak and have heard MY story several times. It's all about me, me, me, NOT.

Hang with us!

yor5150

My disease tries to tell me I'm unique, different than, apart from, socially challenged, blah blah blah. It lies all the time but sometimes with a grain of truth, always trying to find a weak spot to penetrate.

We are all different in some ways but very much connected and the same in others. The disease of addiction would have me think otherwise so it can separate me from the pack. Once separated it can go in for the kill.

Please don't listen to the disease and look for the similarities, always the similarities.

Peace!