60-Days Today
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 452
60-Days Today
Today is 60 days sober. In that time I have run just under 300 miles, lost weight, been able to think clearly (including thinking things through), become a better husband and a father, and been able to go on several business trips.
I have to say, the thing I have enjoyed the most about being sober is getting along with my wife. I have been able to look at any situation for what it is. I am no longer blame-shifting . . . I can, and do, take responsibility for my actions. We are getting along beautifully. I am also there for my kids 100% of the time. I am proud to be a good example for them 100% of the time. I read a lot on the F&F Forum about spouses just "wanting that person I married back." I heard that from my wife countless times. It hurts to accept that I made her feel that way. Mainly because of the fact that I have no real idea how that must have made her feel.
I do not have many cravings to drink, but there are a few situations that are still triggers for me. When the thought of drinking even crosses my mind, I think it through and in a matter of about 5-seconds, I realize that it is not worth it. I will not put my family through another second of "my previous life." The strongest trigger is when I spend time with people that really romanticize drinking. They are not alcoholics, but they really relish the "social scene." I just have a different scene now. I was out of town last week and I went to dinner with a couple of friends. One was talking about the weekned and how he was going to get together with a family member and "go all out." I thought to myself "I'm going to go all out too, I'm going to go on a long run on the weekend." I am realizing that I am not a slave to these thoughts of drinking; in actuality, I can analyze and re-format the thoughts to be fuel for my own desires.
I also travel a fair amount for my job. I really used to look forward to this time as unfettered time to really go into the bottle. Over the past 2 months, I have travelled a lot. I was a bit on edge the first couple of trips. I spent a lot of time thinking about things to do to not drink before the first couple of trips. When I travel I stay on top of my workout routine and I relax, network, and enjoy treating myself to a few nice meals. I really feel a sense of satisfcation when I return home. No longer do I feel embarrassed, and completely depleated of energy upon my return. Now, I feel proud, energized, and ready to spend time with my family.
I have come to accept that if I want to have a drink or two I could maintain that pace for a while, but it will always end up the same (i.e., me going way overboard and becoming self-destructive). My ego used to get the best of me and I would try like mad to prove that I could be a social drinker. I have come to accept that I cannot. It is the best decision I have ever made. Nothing good came from me drinking. Even when it was at a social stage. I now have the ability to set goals, achieve goals, empathize, and achieve an overall feeling of self-worth.
I have to say, the thing I have enjoyed the most about being sober is getting along with my wife. I have been able to look at any situation for what it is. I am no longer blame-shifting . . . I can, and do, take responsibility for my actions. We are getting along beautifully. I am also there for my kids 100% of the time. I am proud to be a good example for them 100% of the time. I read a lot on the F&F Forum about spouses just "wanting that person I married back." I heard that from my wife countless times. It hurts to accept that I made her feel that way. Mainly because of the fact that I have no real idea how that must have made her feel.
I do not have many cravings to drink, but there are a few situations that are still triggers for me. When the thought of drinking even crosses my mind, I think it through and in a matter of about 5-seconds, I realize that it is not worth it. I will not put my family through another second of "my previous life." The strongest trigger is when I spend time with people that really romanticize drinking. They are not alcoholics, but they really relish the "social scene." I just have a different scene now. I was out of town last week and I went to dinner with a couple of friends. One was talking about the weekned and how he was going to get together with a family member and "go all out." I thought to myself "I'm going to go all out too, I'm going to go on a long run on the weekend." I am realizing that I am not a slave to these thoughts of drinking; in actuality, I can analyze and re-format the thoughts to be fuel for my own desires.
I also travel a fair amount for my job. I really used to look forward to this time as unfettered time to really go into the bottle. Over the past 2 months, I have travelled a lot. I was a bit on edge the first couple of trips. I spent a lot of time thinking about things to do to not drink before the first couple of trips. When I travel I stay on top of my workout routine and I relax, network, and enjoy treating myself to a few nice meals. I really feel a sense of satisfcation when I return home. No longer do I feel embarrassed, and completely depleated of energy upon my return. Now, I feel proud, energized, and ready to spend time with my family.
I have come to accept that if I want to have a drink or two I could maintain that pace for a while, but it will always end up the same (i.e., me going way overboard and becoming self-destructive). My ego used to get the best of me and I would try like mad to prove that I could be a social drinker. I have come to accept that I cannot. It is the best decision I have ever made. Nothing good came from me drinking. Even when it was at a social stage. I now have the ability to set goals, achieve goals, empathize, and achieve an overall feeling of self-worth.
Trudging that road.
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Seattle Wa
Posts: 6,840
Happy B-Day 60 days Ethos23
:day2 60 days
your a miracle Ethos23
One of the things I like to do when I travel is, every new town I go to I find a new AA meeting. Its great to see recovery working all over the U.S.
I would love to travel abroad and check out some of their meetings, maybe some day. I'll put that on my to do list
your a miracle Ethos23One of the things I like to do when I travel is, every new town I go to I find a new AA meeting. Its great to see recovery working all over the U.S.
I would love to travel abroad and check out some of their meetings, maybe some day. I'll put that on my to do list
Last edited by newby1961; 07-25-2011 at 07:14 AM. Reason: punctuation
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Plymouth, MN
Posts: 960
Congrats and thanks for sharing. I know that I did best in my recovery when I was doing a lot of running and working out. For me I need to focus on something else, something more. Continued success and thanks for giving me the little push and incentive to get back into leading a healthy life.
Congrats Ethos.
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