Zube

Hi Everyone...

Been sober for 7-1/2 months. Felt horrible while detoxing, then a little better after the physical W/D, then felt great. Stopped drinking after 24 years. On top of the world. Total "Pink Cloud" syndrome. ETC...

Still going to AA 5-6 times a week, got a sponsor, working the steps, getting some exercise in, eating better, taking my vitamins, more spritual than before, etc...

Sometime within the past month or so the "Pink Cloud" vanished, and I feel as though I've fallen off a cliff into a deep depression. Tired all the time, but insomnia at night. Miserable at work. Not myself. Uncomfortable. Grateful to be sober, but not real happy.

Can this be PAWS? Or maybe just good old fashion depression after 24 years of self medicating? Anybody gone (or going) through this? Is it temporary? Any suggestions?...

thanks,
Zube

BackToSquareOne

Zube, I quit 3 years ago this August. I never had the pink cloud though, wasn't until about 6 months ago when I started looking into the spiritual side of the equation that I started feeling a lot better. I also saw a Doctor for depression but the meds didn't do much, they seem to work for some people though. It could be PAWS, at the time I quit I had close to 30 years of bender style drinking.

Kjell

Hiya Zube-

I had horrible PAWS symptoms around 6 - 8 months of sobriety.

Hard to think straight.
Headaches.
Wobbly walking.
If I stood up too fast, I'd get naseaus and even see stars (this one really worried me).
unpredictable sleeping patterns
etc...

It was confusing to me b/c I had been sober for 6 or so months, but I did some research (and posted here) and yep, those were PAWS sympstoms "to the tee".

I'm now about 18 - 19 months sober and it's getting better, but I still have moments where I go backwards for some reason.

Kjell~

PS - never had a pink cloud. not once (wonder why?)

wellwisher

Zube -

I had the same exact thing happen to me about six months into sobriety. It happened while I was still in outpatient treatment, and ended up getting a short term prescription for anti-depressants. Took them for about four months, and tapered off under a doctor's supervision.

Haven't had a need for medication since then. It will pass, but if it comes to the point where the feeling severly impacts your daily life, I hope you consider seeing a doctor to get you though "the hump".

Keep going....better days are coming

CarolD

Please check with your doctor...it may have nothing to do with either your drinking or recovery.

To keep my pink cloud sailing high....I find a new AA member to share with one on one....

SASA

I think I got PAWS after 3 month. I got really depressed, lost interest, got very dizzy. It then lifted, but from time to time I still feel like crap, I get headaches out of the nowhere, feel dizzy, lack of interest, feeling lost. It stops after 3-4 days, but the 3-4 days are really hard for me. I started my journey last year june 17th. I had 3 major 1 week relapse periods, one in august (1 week, visited my mother), one over christmas and new year (yeap guess what visited my mother, should have leanred it then right) and 2 one days in february, was tempted by a friend to drink for 1 night and broke up with a boyfriend and drunk.

1undone

Well I'm only two months and i have no idea what this "pink cloud" deal is and I've been having most of the PAWS stuff since the first month. So yeah I'm new to all this but I read up on it. I'm on an antidepressant and still have the symptoms. Maybe I need a different med? It seems like you can experience PAWS at any time after drinking long term.

notaloser

I thought I was through the PAWS part at 4-5 months...now 7.5 months and its full force again! Can't trust my own thoughts since I know I'm making mountains out of molehills. I'm crabby and angry and frustrated, anxiety is awful. Hoping it'll pass soon.

StPeteGrad

It sure sounds like depression. I drank for about as long as you and am a couple months shy of your sober time but it sure sounds like depression.

I've noticed I get symptoms of PAWS without depression, depression without PAWS and both together (ocassionally neither).

I know that I can sometimes feel the depression hit like a wave. Other times I feel like a 4-year-old walking around in his dad's shoes.

ahhhhh- "And this too shall pass."

AA is great because it's a way to meet so many happy sober people that can assure us much of this is temporary as our minds heal.

Hang in there- I can truely sympathize.

I'm going to start the "Reboot" diet next week and see if that will help kick depression's azz. It's an all raw fruit and vegetable diet to bring back vitamin balance.

SomethingBetter

Zube I know the feeling, it comes and goes for me, sometimes I get this deep down feeling to just cry and I dont know why, I have lack of intrest and crazy sleep patterns (4:30 AM as I write this).

but my life is better these days, sober...

Crow3000

I hit this wall around nine months. Seems quite common. I'm at around 14.5 months sober and things have gotten a lot better with time. Unfortunately I don't have any concrete solutions and this seems to happen to people regardless of their recovery method. One thing I would warn against is making anykind of big changes at this point. I was really raw and couldn't handle nothin new. Just hang in their and be low key and it should slowly pass. If things arent getting any better in a few months I would look into any depression issues, but again, for me at least, I did see a very slow improvement. Just remember, your in this for the long haul.

johnrambo

Zube, did you get it figured out? Glad you posted this, can't seem to get anybody to respond to my similar question.

I'm at 5 & 1/2 months right now and my symptoms just spiked again, I never had a "pink cloud" but just a period where I didn't feel like complete crap but yea, it seems to have gone away and irritability, anxiety, insomnia, and fatigue are back.

Once you got through this period did you feel a lot better or did your doc find a different problem? How do you feel? You're at 15 months sober now?

TheEnd

Try switching it up and doing something new.

johnrambo

What do you mean? You mean new as far as daily routine, activities etc?

Thanks for the reply.

SamanthaIam

Does anyone know why this happens? What the physical causes are that would make this occur so late after you stop drinking?

Curious... I'm new to this and thought I would soon reach "normal" and not have drinking-related issues anymore.

Any thoughts?

steelmagnolia

i felt this way at about 6 months. i realized what it was for me....boredom. i went back to work. now, i have found that my work can be exciting and rewarding. before, i saw it as a huge amount of pressure and very emotionally and physically draining. actually, it was the alcohol that was draining me. do something....anything but use....give your mind something else to discover. it will spark your entire being and there wont be time for negative thoughts and feelings. take pictures....color in a book-great therapy actually....start a project....learn a new dance....get up and boogey!! good luck..mags

johnrambo

I don't know but I guess it's common, as my grand-sponser said, "How long did it take you to get this way? You're not gonna get better overnight".

Looking back on a previous attempt at quitting, it was the 3 month mark when I broke down and drank again. People warned me of the 3 month milestone but it still caught me off guard this time around.

Almost at 6 months now, longest run yet, most thorough too. I'm looking forward to this 6-8 month period I hear so much about. I've heard a lot about the brain's biochemistry during this period, it's ability to heal, and a "feel good" feeling that reminds you of childhood before we got into alcohol/drugs.

NYCDoglvr

It sounds like depression to me. It may be transitory, such as being affected by change of season, approaching winter, November, getting dark early. Very common people are affected by Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). If treating these common causes of depression don't work it's time to get to a shrink; other kinds of depression can't really be treated without medication and therapy. According to what I've read, doctors say mental illnesses like depress more often than not run parallel to depression.

You're still in early sobriety, too. It was hard getting used to reality without the medication (booze) I'd used for years mainly because I didn't want to be present for my feeling. To learn that feelings change (yes, the good ones too).

CleanandSober44

I picked up my 90 day chip last year, and BAMM! Woke up the next day with the worst depression Id ever had. I had been on a pink cloud for approx two months before then.

The depression lasted for aprrox 5 weeks. I quit caffiene, started eating better and took fish oil, and I woke up one day and it was tottaly gone.

Im 18 months sober and do have bad days from time to time. But, I can handle days compared to months.

Peace,
Michael

johnrambo

Yea, the 90 day mark is the worst.