toasty2

Hi all,

I am on day 1 again and determined after a terrible experience on Friday night/Saturday morning when the police were at my door. I got away with it but it has terrified me.

I went to AA twice several months ago and everyone was nice, gave me their numbers but I couldn't face the third meeting and went back to my old tricks. I know I need to start going again but wonder how forgiving people will be.

I cannot access the chat page so if anyone wants to pm.....

instant

I am on day 7 (again...... but not for a long time). we all have to find our own way- forgiveness and humility is part of the way back. we learn a little each time. Sites like this and AA exist because it is not easy to do- especially on your own

instant

toasty2

I am worried that I will do what I always do, stop when something really bad happens, start feeling ok and then drink again.

endlesspatience

Dear Toasty

All of can relate to that awful experience of regret and a desire to break the pattern of returning to our old tricks. It's extremely tough, especially when the alcohol - which is a depressive drug - is still in our systems.

As you know, having been to AA, the suggestion is do not pick up the first drink and bear in mind the consequences of drinking such as, in your case, a visit from the police.

Is there anything to stop you going to AA again? Can you get to a meeting today and tell your story there? I go to AA meetings every day and I keep in daily touch with my sponsor and this is enormous help in dealing with the drinking.

Do keep posting. You'll find lots of support here.

toasty2

The only thing stopping me is the embarassment of going to two meetings, being invited to call a few people to go out for coffee and then not calling them and not going to meetings.

I think I will be ok for today and then go to tomorrow's meeting. I know enough to know that I cannot do it alone.

CarolD

Welcome...

when I started my AA steps I shifted from shakey sobriety
into solid recovery....not had another drink...

Glad you will be returning...this time I strongly suggest you get into theSteps.

Please keep posting...many of us are winning over alcohol and so can you.

krug

What other people think is none of your &*#() business. With that said, who cares, it's not about them, it's you. GO TO THE MEETINGS, CALL SOMEONE. Most members have experienced the revolving door, it makes them no never mind.

It's being there and working it. Slips are part of the deal. We seek progress not perfection.

It's been 5 months for me and I miss my alcohol. I continually plan me next drunk and then MAKE myself get out of that stinking thinking. This is a continual process of recovery. Keep working it and good luck.

Kjell

THAT, right there, is your active alcoholic mind telling you that.

Trust me when I tell you that they'll understand and welcome you back with open, helpful, and friendly arms.

AA is a place where alcoholics come together to recover from alcoholism side-by-side.

There are people at AA, who have recovered from alcoholism and who already know you. They'll show you how they did it, free of charge

Maybe it's time to let go of some old ideas?

Kjell~

artsoul

People are in and out of meetings all the time. Infact, some people have massive collections of day 1 coins........ Which one of us wouldn't understand?
No matter what our past, it's always good to see people walk through those doors or come back to SR.

We don't like feeling humbled, but it's really a gift. It means we can say "I don't have it all together" and let others do the same.

It's going to get better......:ghug3